


The 100: Ways To Survive

by Bandicle



Category: Hunger Games Series - All Media Types, Hunger Games Trilogy - Suzanne Collins, The 100, The 100 (TV), The 100 Series - Kass Morgan, The Hunger Games, The Hunger Games (Movies)
Genre: Apocalypse, Bi-Sexual, Bisexual, Bisexual Character, Bisexual Clarke Griffin, Bisexual Female Character, Bisexual Octavia Blake, F/F, F/M, LGBTQ Character, Lesbian, Lesbian Character, Minor Clarke Griffin/Lexa, Minor Octavia Blake/Lincoln, Past Clarke Griffin/Lexa, Past Octavia Blake/Lincoln - Freeform, Post-Apocalypse, minor clexa - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-24
Updated: 2019-03-17
Packaged: 2019-10-15 16:32:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 40
Words: 54,022
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17532269
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bandicle/pseuds/Bandicle
Summary: Set in between Seasons 3-4.ALIE has fallen and after the death of Jasper and the revelation of the Apocalypse, Clarke, Bellamy, Octavia, Monty and Raven set off to explore the world around them. Only to find a place darker than they imagined. Will the find a solution to the end of the world or be dragged down with it?





	1. Loss

**_ Octavia _ **

 

"Octavia, I love you," Lincoln whispered in my ear. He hugged me from behind as I gathered my weapons. He kissed my neck, I could feel his warmth. He passed me a flower, the same flower that lead me here all that time ago, it feels like a lifetime away since I first met him. Before the others landed when it was just The 100. I remember the days of lying in the cave whilst he sketched my picture or put a flower in my hair or we'd just talk and talk and talk. He'd tell me about the ground and I'd tell him about being on the Ship, the Arcadia. Not that there was much to tell, I spent my life under the floorboards.

 

His hands were on my hips now, I breathed in his scent. "Octavia kom Skaikru, you're so beautiful," he told me.

"I'm a warrior and I'm not Skaikru, I'm Lincolnkru," I responded as I turned around and faced him. His hands touching my bum, pulling me closer. I put my hands on his neck and pulled him close. His lips collided with mine, a gentle kiss. His hands went under my top and lifted it off, he was already topless. I put my hands over his chest, his heart still beating. His hands grabbed at my hips and gently squeezed them. He lifted me up and laid me down on the cave floor. He took off my bottoms and now we were just in our underwear. His hands tracing all over my body, his warmth. My hands traced all over his. Tracing his tattoos. His abs. His face shape. I put them on his head. I removed them as they felt sticky and suddenly they were red with his blood. He went cold and still, his eyes blank. A hole in his head. I stood up immediately. "Lincoln?! No, don't leave me, not yet, please!" I screamed. I stood up and backed away from his body but suddenly I wasn't in the cave, I was in the forest.

 

I began to run, grounders chased after me. They threw spears and arrows, I dodged them, I kept running, my heart pounding. My hands still sticky with his blood. I blinked back tears as I ran, I couldn't die here. And I couldn't cry with the grounders chasing after me. I jumped over logs and tree stumps, I almost fell but I kept good balance. And suddenly someone grabbed me, I was about to scream but he covered my mouth and he pulled me down. He let go of my mouth and I could see, it was Lincoln. A tear fell down from my eye, he gestured for me to be quiet. The grounders passed us. I stared at him. "Don't leave me," I whispered to him.

"Octavia Kom Skaikru, I love you."

"I'm not Skaikru," I sobbed,  "I'm Lincolnkru!"

 

And then he was gone...

 

* * *

 

Light blinded me as I peeled open my eyes, feeling the tears escape my eyes, tumbling down my cheeks. The cracked white ceiling above me, blurred and slowly came into focus as I managed to rub my eyes, trying to piece myself back together.

 

I rolled over, placing an arm into the cold space next to me. I was alone.

 

I felt alone, but the reality is that there are more people on this Earth than what we thought; we found others. Other people and now we have houses and flats and buildings to live in. We were told this used to be a Hotel and somehow survived the apocalypse, it did even more than that - it has electricity! Lights and showers with taps, plumbing. I still don't trust this place though, something seems off and isn't just my paranoia.

 

I sighed as I sat up in my bed, hugging myself as I managed to open my bedside table draw, delicately pulling out Lincoln's book. I flicked through the pages, lightly fingering through the ageing pages, taking in the flowers and the butterflies and of course...me.

 

Tears stung my eyes, he told me I was the most beautiful thing on this planet, but he was wrong; it was him.

 

I quickly shut the book, trying to a contain another wave of tears as I threw myself out of bed, heading to the showers. Fabric slid off my body as I stepped into the shower, holding my breath as I turned the tap and icy fingers scraped down my back. The water here was freezing, I swear it was sometimes even colder than the lakes I used to bathe in. The cold water touched my skin and sent shivers down my spine, it stung my wounds and it felt like it seeped into me. I wish Lincoln was here, he'd warm me up under the icy waters. I washed my face, the warrior paint turning the water black. I let the water wash into my hair, it made me gasp at the coldness. I turned off the taps and dried myself with a towel. I then put my clothes on and was about to put my paint on when I heard a knock at the door. "I'm coming," I shouted. I opened the door.

 

Bellamy.

 

"What do you want?" I snapped at him.

"It's time for breakfast," Bellamy gently told me.

"I don't want to eat with you," I bitterly said and I went to close the door but he stopped me, "move out the way."

"O, don't be like this," Bellamy said, trying to push his way through the doorway.

I slammed my palm onto the door frame, blocking his path, growling, "Be like what? I'm not being like anything."

Bellamy sighed, frustrated but also guilty as he folded his arms, softly saying, "I'm sorry, Octavia. If I could go back, you know I would. Just tell me how I can make this right."

"There is nothing you can do, Bellamy. You murdered him and now I have to live with that." I snapped, feeling tears stinging me again.

Bellamy nodded, "I know, you're right. But if we are going to survive this world, we need to do it together; we've all lost some-"

"What do you know about loss?" I shouted, standing up at him, "what do you know?"

"Is everything alright?" Clarke asked, appearing at the door, behind Bellamy.

I snarled, feeling like a volcano erupting, leaving no inch of land left, "See, you haven't lost anyone. Not really, okay, mum died but we dealt with that. So tell me, who have you lost?"

 

Bellamy looked hurt, "Octavia, I know you're hurting, but you need to calm down."

I shook my head and shouted, "No! Don't tell me what to do! Jasper lost Maya and Monty lost Jasper and he had to kill his own mother. Raven lost Finn and Sinclair, Clarke lost Finn and Lexa. So who have you lost?" I growled. Clarke looked away and I became aware of the eyes stood in the corridor watching, all of them hurt as I called out the dead. I couldn't stop now, the fury had taken over me as I pressed, "C'mon, Bellamy, who have you lost?"

"I lost, I lost Gina," Bellamy sadly said as a tear rolled down his cheek.

"You didn't even love her! You were sweet on Clarke, pining for her to come back, so don't bullshit me. You took away Lincoln, you caused this. You may as well have pulled the trigger!" I screamed at him, shoving him out of my doorway, watching him stumble back, Clarke stared in shock.

 

"Easy, calm down," Clarke tried to soothe.

I looked at Clarke, still shouting, "No, I won't calm down. He killed Lincoln. Like he killed those grounders. Jasper blamed Clarke for killing the Mountain Men, but she did that to save us," I then scowled at Bellamy, pointing at him, I snarled, "You, you, Bellamy, you killed innocent people for no reason. You are the murderer. Clarke did what she had to, to survive. You killed because you're a monster," I growled, shoving past him.


	2. Guilt

**_ Clarke _ **

 

"You, you, Bellamy, you killed innocent people for no reason. You are the murderer. Clarke did what she had to, to survive. You killed because you're a monster," Octavia growled and then she stormed out of her room, slamming the door shut behind her. Monty and Raven stood together, watching closely before deciding to go back into their room.

 

I looked up at Bellamy, as we both stood silent in the corridor. I felt my heart sinking, it was still painful to hear Lexa's name and even more painful to see Bellamy this broken. I knew how Octavia was feeling, I knew she was looking for someone to blame and I knew Bellamy regretted his choices. But I felt guilty for that too, I left him. I left him alone, time and time again. He needed me and I left him. Maybe its me she should blaming.

 

"She's right you know," Bellamy said, his voice cracking, as he leant against the wall, arms folded and tears I his broken brown eyes.

I shook my head, feelings my own tears caught in my throat, "No, she's just grieving."

"Don't. Don't defend me," Bellamy lamely said and he looked at me, his eyes red with tears, "she's right. I killed those innocent grounders. I killed Lincoln.”

I shook my head, "Pike killed Lincoln.”

Bellamy slid down the wall, knees to his chest, head in his hands, "No. I killed him. If I didn't go with Pike, if I didn't-"

"Bellamy, you saved her in the end, you did the right thing," I tried to comfort him, sitting down with him.

"Too late," he weakly said, looking at the floor, placing his hand closest to me on his knee.

"She'll forgive you. She's just angry, like Jasper, like Raven," I sadly said, remembering about the pain I caused them. Remembering when I inserted the knife into Finn, my heart broke. I loved him, but it was the only way to stop him facing a much worse fate. Blood must have blood. Such a stupid saying. And the pain I caused Jasper, but I had to save my people. I had to rescue them. It doesn't make it hurt any less. And Lexa, I miss her. She's all I think about, her dying on that table because her own people shot her. It's funny, Murphy actually helped for once.

 

"How do you do it?" He asked me, lifting his head to look at my eyes.

I looked into his and softly asked, "Do what?"

"Carry the guilt. Live with it. How do you stop seeing their faces at night?" Bellamy asked, his eyes lost and sad. I tightened up.

I firmly said, squeezing his hand closest to me, "You survive."

"How? And the dreams? And the guilt? How do you survive? How do you sleep at night without seeing their faces? How do you look in Monty's eyes? Jasper is dead because of what we did at the mountain. Monty lost his best friend, his brother even, because of us." Then he sighed and threw his arms up in frustration, "How do I look at Octavia?"

My head swirled. I didnt have the answer, I carry it so they don't have to. I _bare_ it so they don't have to. How do I take it the pain from Bellamy? How do I fix him now? I swallowed, "You, You apologise, you tell them you regret it. And you never hurt them again. And the dreams, you deal with them. Eventually it gets better and better for them and for you."

 

This is the first time we've spoken properly since I left and since the City of Light fell.

 

The first time Since I left him alone. Maybe if I didn't leave him, none of this would have happened. I was a coward, I ran from everything. I couldn't bare to see Jasper's eyes. And now I face Bellamy's. He begged me to stay and I left him, I won't do that again. "I'm sorry," I apologised.

"Sorry? Sorry for what?" Bellamy mumbled, looking in my eyes.

I looked down, "I'm sorry for leaving you."

"It's okay. Don't worry," Bellamy said and then he stood up.

"No it's not," I said, standing up with him, "I shouldn't have left. You needed me and I left. I left because I was a coward I couldn't face Jasper and the blood on my hands. You needed me and I left because I was a coward."

Bellamy turned his hand over, holding mine in his, trying to comfort me, "What's done is done. You lost Lexa."

"You've lost people too," I firmly said. First my dad, then Finn and now Lexa.

 

"I've missed you," I mumbled.

"I've missed you too," he replied. I lifted my head to look up at him, he used his free hand to delicately wipe away my tears with his thumb. Our eyes were hooked on to each other's, our faces drifted closer and our lips touched. Salty from the tears, slow and gentle. We pulled apart.

 

Bellamy croaked, "I'm sorry."

I shook my head, "Don't be. But I can't do this, Bell. Not now, not after Lexa. I need time."

Bellamy nodded, his eyes looking down at our fingers intertwined, "I know and I'll wait. I'll always be here, always. It's me and you, Princess."

 

* * *

 

"Do you think we'll ever be happy?" I asked Bellamy, as we laid on his bed, staring up at the ceiling, our hands still connected.

Bellamy squeezed my hand, "Of course. One day, there will be no more wars or killing. We'll have a patch of land and a home, where we'll grow crops and you can decorate the walls with drawings of space and Earth. Maybe we'll invite Kane and Abby round and Monty will have finally asked Raven out and have geeky babies whilst drinking moonshine."

I placed our hands on his chest, not quite believing his fairytale and feeling too broken to play along, "You still have hope? Even after what ALIE said?"

Bellamy nodded, "We still breathing?"

Before I could say anything, a voice echoed through a speaker:

 

**“Can** **all** **parties** **return to their meeting**   **stations.”**

 

* * *

 

We walked back to the main building and into the Great Hall. We weaved through the crowd until we saw Raven, Monty and Octavia. "What's going on?" Raven asked Bellamy.

"No idea." Bellamy replied.

"More survivors?" I suggested, remembering the first time we came, the leader greeted us and hosted a ceremony to introduce us to the whole civilisation here.

"Maybe," Bellamy replied.

"Or maybe not," Octavia muttered, she was sat down at the table, she didn't trust this place and I had my doubts too.

 

**“All residents sit down in your designated seats.”**

 

I sat down in-between Octavia and Bellamy, Monty in between Bellamy and Raven. Men in white suits started to fill into the room, I had goosebumps, afraid. I saw Octavia pick up a table knife, all our weapons had been confiscated. Me and Bellamy shared a nervous glance and I nodded at Raven, she also had fear in her eyes. The white men began to approach us, with a machine. They were advancing to our area. "What's going on?" Monty whispered.

"I don't know but I don't like it," Octavia muttered back, slipping the knife down the waistband of her pants. The man in white was now closer, two people away, I felt nervous and so did the rest of us, it was like the Mountain all over again. He was now at Raven. "What's your name?" He sternly asked.

"Why do want to know?" Raven suspiciously asked, facing the man, her back towards us. I stared at him, white skin, dark eyes, black hair and a clean shave.

"It would be best if you complied, missy, now what's your name?" The man firmly said, with a hint of boredom in his tone. He held a machine in his hand. By now, another person in white had showed up and was about to grill Octavia. Octavia, the girl with the table knife down the waistband of her pants. Octavia, who never wanted to come here in the first place. Octavia, who gave a look that could kill, never mind the things she could actually do in combat.

"I'm not telling you my name," Raven argued back, "I want to know why."

"Routine check, just comply," The man told her. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The end of this chapter is a little shite, I tried my best to make improvements but there is only so much I can do.
> 
> I hope you enjoyed the Bellarke scenes anyway, Jason may never make it canon, but I will try to in this story ;-)


	3. Lies

**_ Octavia _ **

 

"Madam, what is your name?" The woman in white asked me. She was basically in a white hazard suit. I didn't trust her at all.

"What's _your_ name?" I retorted, feeling for the knife in my waistband, I could easy take her.

"My name is Clara Watkins, now what is yours?" She answered, calm but stern.

"No. Why should I tell you?" I growled, taking a step closer to her.

"Because, this is a routine check of our residents and we wish to make you a citizen of the Survivors Guild," the woman responded.

"Can I have a minute to talk with my friends?" I asked her, suspicious.

"Of course," she replied.

 

I turned away and formed a circle with Bellamy, Clarke, Monty and Raven. "Look, we could easy take these two, I don't trust this place," I muttered.

Bellamy shut me down, "Look, it's safe here, they would've separated us by now, split us up, harmed us, this isn't the Mountain and these people go outside.” He thinks he knows everything.

"Then why the suits?" I argued, "something isn't right here, I know it-"

"Well," the woman interrupted me, "this place is perfectly safe, you can leave whenever you wish."

"Then let's go," I demanded my team, "this place is dangerous, I can feel it."

"Well, actually, you can't leave just yet," the woman informed us, "you have to be logged into the system."

"The system?" I questioned, "what system?"

"Just your name and clan so we can keep your room open and give you jobs and make you welcome here, free medicine and food. Clothes. Anything you need you can have, once your a citizen," Clara informed us.

 

"Take off your helmet," I demanded.

"What?" Clara asked, shocked.

"Take it off, if you're who you say you are, then take off the helmet," I demanded again.

"Why?" Clara asked, bored.

"Take it off!" I yelled.

"May I remind you to not shout, this is a peaceful facility and-"

"Take it off!" I yelled again.

"Fine," Clara muttered and removed her helmet, I stared at her light-skinned face, waiting for the radiation to consume her, but nothing. I scanned her brown eyes for any signs of pain, but again... nothing.

"He takes his off too," I ordered, pointing at the man next to Raven.

"Robert, could you take your helmet off, please," Clara asked the man.

"Why?" Robert asked.

"Just, the newcomers want to see our faces, take it off please," Clara said, boredom in her tone.

"Okay," he replied with a smirk and again, nothing happened.

"Now will you tell me your name and clan?" Clara asked me.

I just stared. I looked at Bellamy for guidance, he stared back and nodded as if to say it's my choice.

Clara rolled her eyes and said, "Look, if we were going to kill you or harvest you for blood we wouldn't be giving you water and showers and rooms and clothes and food, we would just kill you. We wouldn't ask for your name or clan, because we would just kill you. Now tell me your name and clan."

"Octavia Blake, The hundred," I muttered, she put it in her system.

"The hundred isn't a clan-"

"SkaiKru," Bellamy interrupted.

"Okay, next."

"Bellamy Blake," Bellamy told her and then he stood next to me, and gave me a squeeze.

"Clarke Griffin-"

"Wanheda, didn't expect you here," Clara responded to Clarke and then walked past.

"Monty Green."

"Raven Reyes."

 

"Good, now you're all in our system, follow me, please," Clara announced and she led us out of the main hall and into a restricted zone. She then led us into a room and there was six chairs, we were informed to sit down and we did. We stared at her and at the sixth chair. "Who's chair is that?" Monty asked.

"You'll see," she replied.

We all watched her silently, the only sound coming from her typing on a keyboard and a clock ticking. I looked around the white walls, and white tiles - it was like a laboratory. I feared what they were experimenting on, or rather who. I still had the knife in my waist and and I could feel my fingers itching to reach it, I did not trust this place one bit. If being on the ground had taught me anything it was: trust no one.

 

And I was right.

 

"Let me go! LET ME GO!" A shout cried out, outside our room. I turned my head to the door, the voice was familiar.

"Get your hands off of me!" The man shouted again, "get off of me! LET ME GO!" It was right outside the door. I went to stand up, when I felt something restrict me. We all looked down and saw the chair had extended metal bars, restricting us to the chairs. We looked at Clara, "This is only to keep you safe," she told us, a worried look in her eye.

"You bitch," I spat.

"LET ME GO!" The door burst open.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I barely edited this chapter, I perhaps could have done. I found repeating description with “I” doesn’t make it flow as much.
> 
> Perhaps you can see a slight difference in this chapter compared to my other works?


	4. Captured

**_ Murphy _ **

 

They caught us. Running through the forest. Me and Emori after we escaped the city. She's the only person that has ever understood me and we had to get out. Everything had turned to shit, Clarke babbling about the world ending because some imaginary person called Allie had told her. I hated seeing Emori with her brain taken over, but I got her back and I won't let her go.

 

Knees laid on wet grass, mud soaking through them as smeared a mixture of sheep’s blood and mud on my face; Emori was still asleep in our cave and being the romantic I am, I wanted to impress her, steal something nice. Of course, she knew what I was up to as her footsteps tried to sneak up behind me, "You can never do that without me.”

I turned around to look at her, she was beautiful as always, I shrugged, “Oh really? Why don’t you come over here and help me then?”

Emori shook her head, “I’m good thanks, I’ve only just gotten the blood out of my nails from last time.”

I shrugged, “Your loss.”

 

Emori watched me, before playfully stepping towards me, saying, “You really are helpless.” She put her fingers on my cheeks, stroking it. I felt a smile on my lips, she loved me and I loved her. She gently kissed me and I moved my hands to her hips, pulling her closer. I knew she was special since the day we met in the desert.

 

The kiss ended far too quickly, but this moment was far too special to let it. I lifted my left hand, feeling the fabric covering her right, took her right, softly saying, "I've told you, you don't need to cover it up. I think it's bad ass!"

She shook her head and smiled, pressing her nose against mine, "You're a liar."

"I'm not, you're the most beautiful girl I've ever seen," I pushed a piece of loose hair out of her face. She grabbed my hands, pulling us off the path, until we were out of sight. Her back rested against a tree, my arms snaked around to her hips, gently squeezing her hips as my lips began to kiss hers. Emori turned her head away, teasing as she gently pushed me backwards until I had my back against rough bark. Her lips hovered over mine, hands grabbing my shirt, her breath tickling me and right when I thought she'd grace me with her love, she walked away. Eyebrow raised, a wink and a smile, she loved playing with me. I reached a hand towards her, taking a step. Not surprised when she took off running, she loved to play kiss chase. "C'mon!" I playfully shouted, running after her.

 

Tree after tree passed me. No sound or sight of Emori.

 

Something was wrong.

She would've stopped by now.

 

I stood still, listening.

 

I heard her scream.

 

"Emori!" I called out. And began running after her. Men had picked her up and were carrying her to a vehicle, she stabbed one of them and was chucked on the floor, I ran up to them and pulled out my knife, I sliced one of them and pulled Emori to her feet, we stood back to back, the men looking at us. One of them dead on the floor, the other had blood running down their arm. "Stay back," I barked.

"We don't want to hurt you," one of them said, "but you need to come with us," he held out his hand.

"Not a chance," I growled and aimed my knife. There was five men alive, we couldn't take them all. Fight or flee.

"Just come with us," the man with blood down his arm repeated.

"Stay back!" I shouted and swiped with my knife, cutting another man. I couldn't let them take us.

"Just calm down," he ordered.

"Leave us alone," I snarled. I grabbed Emori's hand.

"You either get in the van now or we make you."

"No!" I shouted and I lunged forward, stabbing the man in front and it all happened too fast. A gun came out and it shot Emori, she collapsed immediately. I blinked and then pain surged through me, I looked down and saw a dart in my leg and soon everything was black.

 

* * *

 

Bright light appeared as I slowly opened my eyes. I was laid on a bed, surrounded by white walls and then a guard entered my room, before I could react, two guards had my arms and heaved me up. "Where's Emori?" I demanded, my voice quiet from the sleeping drugs.

"Be quiet and calm, you are safe now," a woman said, appearing in front of me. She was in a doctors outfit, white lab coat, white skirt, light blue shirt, white heels and glasses, her skin was olive and her bright orange hair was in a straight ponytail, her green eyes sparkling.

"Where's Emori?!" I shouted.

The girl looked at me and calmly said, "Your friend is sleeping. Now, please remain calm, John."

"How do you know my name?" I responded, anger in my tone.

The girl, who looked the same age as me, said in a soothing voice, "Just relax, my name is Delilah, this is the Survivors Guild."

I resisted against the men and tried to kick out with my legs, but they held me tight. "Where are we going?" I spat.

"Somewhere." Delilah sharply responded.

"Let me Go!" I shouted again, resisting.

Delilah scolded me, "Stop being so difficult, we're nearly here."

"I don't care if I live or die, just kill me," I flatly said.

Delilah tutted and rolled her eyes, her voice was then sympathetic, "We all know that's a lie or you wouldn't be fighting so hard. You're safe now, calm down."

"Where's Emori?" I asked, more calm this time, playing along with game. We'd been walking down corridor after corridor, they all had white walls and blue tiled floor, much like a hospital before the nukes. The Ark showed us pictures.

Delilah looked ahead at the corridor and then glanced at me, she tried to reassure me, "She's safe, as will you be. We're almost here."

 

I stopped trying to escape and I let them carry me throughout the maze. If they killed me, fine. I wouldn't give them the pleasure of seeing me this angry. We were walking along when we came to a halt. We stood their whilst Delilah spoke to a man, apparently his name was Robert. They were talking about other people and that the room was prepped for routine checks. I was stood up, the guards grip had loosened up a bit. We were just waiting and waiting. When suddenly I saw her. Emori. Being carried by men, she was still sleeping. I elbowed one of the guards in the stomach and shouted "Emori!" She didn't wake up. The other guard grabbed me. I shoved against them, "Let me go! Let me Go! Let me see her! Get off!" I roared, trying to break free, wrestling the guards but there grip was too tight and the door of the room had opened, I struggled to break free, but I failed. "Let me go! Let me see her!" I called out again, but the guards had forced me into the room and slammed my back against a chair. I still kept shouting and trying to force against them, but they held me tight and suddenly metal bars caged me to the chair.

 

* * *

 

**_ Clarke _ **

 

"Let me go! Let me Go! Let me see her! Get off!" A familiar voice roared as the door opened, we were all watching. "Let me go! Let me see her!" The man called out again, we couldn't see who it was as the guards blocked our view. The man kicked and screamed and tried to force his way out but the guards were too strong for him and then he was slammed against the chair and caged, like the rest of us. The guards left and Clara looked worried. I saw the man laid next to me.

 

Murphy.

 

Murphy filled the last chair. It went Murphy, me, Bellamy, Octavia, Jasper, Raven. We all stared blankly at Clara. Murphy tried to break free, but he stopped shouting and soon stopped moving. He scowled at the floor and then he looked at us all. "So it's some big family reunion, boy I'm glad to see you guys," Murphy sarcastically said, breaking the silence.

"You are safe now," Clara told us, "the Routine check is nearly over, I'm sorry for the restraints, but we need to ensure the peace."

"Where's Emori?" Murphy muttered.

"She's safe, John," Clara replied.

"Emori is with you?" I asked him.

"Yes, she is, the bastards took her. They shot us with tranquillisers," Murphy growled, scowling at Clara.

"They shot you?" I asked him, surprised. We found this place through exploration, it was marked on Lincoln's Map and we decided to explore, they welcomed us at first, led us to rooms and showers. It's been a week since we arrived, it seemed decent but now we're chained to chairs.

 

"Yes, they did. And when I woke up I was in some sort of cell." Murphy bitterly said.

"Well, this is routine check and i have a machine, with your detail on it and you need a jab, so it won't hurt that much," Clara nervously said. Clara was wearing a white lab coat, a white skirt, a light blue shirt, white heels and her bright blonde hair was in a bun with loose strands framing her face, parted in the middle; she was a nurse. She came behind Murphy and said into the machine, "John Murphy, SkaiKru." And then she inserted the thing into the back of his neck, Murphy winced. She came to me next. I stared at her, "What is that thing?" I asked her.

"It's just a vaccine, keeps you safe, now hold still. Clarke Griffin, SkaiKru." Then a sharp prick in my neck. I winced with the pain.

"Bellamy Blake, SkaiKru," Clara said and then proceeded to vaccinate Bellamy.

"Jasper Jordan, SkaiKru." Vaccinated.

"Rave Reyes, SkaiKru." Vaccinated.

"Wait, wait a minute before you vaccinate me," Octavia calmly said before Clara vaccinated her.

"Okay, what's wrong? You're safe now," Clara said.

"I, I just want to know, did Lincoln come here?" Octavia asked, looking down at the floor.

"Lincoln? What clan is he from?" Clara asked, and she stepped in front of Octavia. I saw her hand in her waistband. The table knife.

"He's, he was, from Trikru. Did he come here?" Octavia said, letting a tear roll down her cheek. Fake crying.

"Oh don't cry," Clara comfortingly said and walked around the front of Octavia and pulled her into a hug.

"Was he here?" Octavia repeated.

"Um, I don't remember," Clara responded.

"Can't you search him, on the system?" Octavia asked.

"I'm not sure, I can try. After we've got you registered and vaccinated," Clara said and she stood up.

"Wait, can I have another hug? I hate needles," Octavia sadly said.

"Of course!" Clara exclaimed with happiness and lent in to hug her. And then she yelped.

"Take that, you bitch," Octavia shouted and Clara staggered back, clutching her side, where Octavia stabbed her.

"I thought you trusted me," Clara sadly said, then she picked up her machine, "Octavia Blake, SkaiKru," and then she shoved the thing in Octavia's neck and stormed out the room. We were all alone. The 100. Everything was silent, nobody was talking. Nothing to say. And then it all went black.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Clara is the type of person that believes in seeing the good in everyone whilst convincing herself that she is always doing things for the “greater good” even if it goes against her own people, which is her fatal flaw as this means her loyalty can be easily changed if she’s manipulated enough to believe the other side is good.
> 
> I edited the first segment of this chapter (the woods bit) because I still struggle to write action scenes and build up tension.


	5. Mist

_** Clarke ** _

 

White mist pooled at my feet, the only thing I could see in the darkness. One foot in front of the other, walking endlessly on my own. Everything felt peaceful and calm, blue glowing butterflies danced around me. So beautiful. Above me, stars shone, guiding the the way, leading me down a winding path through a forest. The sound of running water called me as my feet stopped at the edge of a river bank, steam pouring from the hot spring.

 

But I was not alone.

 

A figure awaited me in the water, she was not looking at me, but she knew I was here. I took off my top and bottoms, then unhooked my bra and slid off my pants. I was naked, but the forest felt warm. I dipped my toe in the warm, clear blue water and gently glided over to the person waiting for me. She looked at me, eyes sparkling like the stars, full of life like the forest around us. Her skin was soft and warm, how I remembered it from the final time we frolicked in her bed at her headquarters.

 

I missed her.

 

I knew this wasn't real. But I didn't care, I missed her so much. "I love you," I mumbled to her.

"Shhh," she whispered to me as she put her hand on my cheek and the other on around my back, pulling me closer. I left mine at my sides. Then I slowly brought a finger up and wiped a spot of water off her cheek.

"Lexa, I-"

"Don't talk, Clarke, I want this moment to be special."

"I know, but I've missed you so much," I sadly told her, tears in my eyes, staring into hers.

"I know, I've missed you too," Lexa softly said, then she gently kissed me on my lips. My arms were now around her waist. A perfect embrace. She grabbed my hand and gestured for me to be quiet as she lead us out of the water, across the soft grass and into a cabin.

 

A small fire crackled inside the stone fireplace of the cabin and a bed sat facing it. Lexa pulled me towards the bed, she pushed me gently onto it and hovered above me, kissing me gently. Lexa then laid down next to me, so we were facing each other. I grabbed a strand of her hair and began to play with it, Lexa smiled, she's so beautiful. I looked down at the hair. It kills me inside, I know this isn't real. I know this is a dream, but I miss her. And that's when a tear fell down. Lexa gently wiped it away.

"I'm sorry," I mumbled, sitting up.

"Don't be," she replied, as she sat up with me, pulling me Into a hug and wiping my tears. Through the window I could see the sun rising.

"I don't want to leave," I sobbed, wiping away my tears.

"Clarke, you know you can't stay here-"

"But I want you with me."

"I know," Lexa responded as she grabbed my hands, "But you can't stay here, you have a life out there, with Bellamy."

"Bellamy?" I repeated, confused.

"Yes, Bellamy, you know you love him, he cares for you-"

"I love you, Lexa," I numbly responded, still staring at her beautiful face as the tears rolled down. I knew what she was about to say and I looked towards the window, the light seeping in. The forest fading.

"But, I'm not there. I'm only in your heart, I'll always be with you. But you need to move on," Lexa firmly told me and she stood up.

"I don't want to leave-"

"You have to," Lexa softly instructed, pulling me off the bed. She took my hand and guided me to the door, "goodbye, Clarke," Lexa said, she kissed me one last time, and then whispered in my ear, "May we meet again." And then she was gone. The cabin gone. The lake gone. The butterflies gone. The forest gone. Everything replaced with bright white light and voices.

 

* * *

 

I sat up on the bed and saw food on a table, and everyone eating it. Metal bars guarding us in this cell. I stood up and walked over the food, "Clarke, you're awake," Bellamy announced.

"Finally," Octavia said with an eye roll.

"What happened? Where are we?" I asked, grabbing a chicken leg and eating it, Octavia grabbed an apple, and looked at me.

 

"We're in a prison, awaiting more trials," Octavia told me, just as Clara appeared at the cell door.

"Ah, you're awake, good," Clara announced looking at me, "if you'd all come stand here, at the door."

"Why should we?" Octavia growled, taking a bite of an apple.

"Yeah, why should we? And where's Emori?" Murphy asked, sitting down on a bed. Bellamy was leaning against the back wall, and Raven and Jasper were now standing, Raven with her arms folded.

"Because you can either be cooperative and do things easily or do things the hard way." Clara sighed.

"You still haven't answered my question," Murphy casually said as he sauntered over to the bars, leaning against them, right in front of Clara.

"If you come with me, I'll show you to Emori, deal?" Clara suggested, staring at Murphy. He stared for awhile thinking, then he turned to face us, still leaning with his arm on the bars. He slowly turned to face Clara again, "So, if we agree to do whatever bullshit you want us to do, I can see Emori?"

"Of course, John, you-"

"Don't listen to her, Murphy," Octavia interrupted, as she quickly marched over to Murphy and stared him the eye whilst putting her hand on his shoulder, "she's probably lying to you-"

"You can trust me, John," Clara assured.

"Don't listen to that bitch," Octavia repeated, "How can we trust her?" Octavia then turned to face Clara, "How can we trust you? You told us we were safe, then you throw us in here."

"Octavia, you are perfectly safe here. Nothing to fear. Just trust me and cooperate," Clara firmly stated.

"Where are you taking us anyway?" Octavia huffed.

"It's classified," Clara proclaimed.

"Even more reason not to go with you," Octavia argued as she walked away and sat down on her bed, legs apart, hands in the middle.

 

"Please, cooperate, I don't want you to be harmed, all you have to do is follow me, do a few tests and then you can meet Emori and you'll be free to go-"

"Go?" Monty interjected, in a quiet voice.

"Yes. You can leave " Clara confirmed.

"Can we have a word?" Bellamy requested, "like in private?"

"I'll be back in five," Clara agreed as she walked away.

 

"So what are we going to do, Chief Bellamy?" Murphy requisitioned as he turned around, leaning his back against the bars, with his arms folded and legs crossed.

"We're a team. What do we suppose?" Bellamy responded.

"We don't trust them," Octavia quickly butted in.

"Yes, but they have Emori, and there's no way out of here unless we listen to them," Murphy groaned with an eye roll.

"And if we listen we can leave," Monty injected.

"You believe her?" Octavia argued, "she's lying. Why would they let us ago and what are the tests?"

"Look," Raven calmly began, "we're all skeptical, we know we can't trust them, but we have to follow them. Come up with a plan. Clarke what do you think?"

 

What do I think? Octavia is right, we can't trust them. And the likelihood of them letting us go is slim to none, but we can't get out of here without doing as Clara instructs us. And Emori as well, how do we get her? And Who knows what the 'tests' are. We have no choice, we have to follow Clara. Maybe we can escape or something on the way. I have no idea.

 

"We go," I mumbled.

"What?!" Octavia exclaimed, shocked at my answer, "what do you mean? We can't trust-"

"Octavia!" I shouted, cutting her off, "Octavia," I repeated in a calmer voice, "I know we can't trust them, but the only way we can get out of this place is by acting like we trust them. So we go with Clara, we act like we trust her. Even like we want to stay here, like this place is safe. But all the time, find possible exits. Find where Emori might be. We go with Clara." I walked towards the cage door and banged on it, "We'll come with you" I called out.

Murphy stood behind me, "Look, princess has a plan, get in line."

"I hope you know what you're doing, Clarke," Octavia muttered as she stood behind Murphy, followed by Bellamy, Raven and then Monty.

 

"I'm glad you've decided to cooperate," Clara smiled as she returned with fourteen, heavily armed guards, all in white with guns.

"Who are they?" Octavia whispered.

"Guards. Probably because you stabbed her," Murphy whispered back with a slight smirk.

"She deserved it," Octavia murmured.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a real sweet chapter that I was really proud of writing. I hope you liked the Clexa content at the beginning, I feel Lexa would want Clarke to be happy again, if you love someone, sometimes you have to let them go if it means they’ll be happier.


	6. Stripped

**_ Clarke _ **

 

They led us down many white corridors with no windows and artificial lights. It reminded me much of the mountain, I didn't trust this place one bit. I prayed that my plan would work and that we weren't just following them to our deaths, happily walking to it. We stopped at a door with a keycard lock, Clara scanned the card and we entered the new room. I say room, but it was the outside. Masses of forest laid out in front of us, we could hear screams and gun shots and see flares and gases. What is this place?

 

"Welcome to The Cloud Realm, This is where you will take your tests," Clara announced as she gestured to the many trees behind her.

"Why are we here?" Octavia asked in a monotone voice.

"You're the curious one, I gather," a strange man noted as he walked up to us, he had glasses and slicked back grey hair, that finished just above his shoulders, he was in a white lab coat, like Clara, a blue shirt, white trousers and black shoes - this seemed to be the running uniform.

"What's it to you what I am?" Octavia growled, aggression in her tone and then she spat on the floor. We were still stood in the same line we exited the cell in, Clara and the stranger stood in front of us, in front of the forest and screams.

"And quite aggressive, I hope you do well, let's not have the curiosity kill the cat," the old man chuckled, "I should probably introduce myself, my name is Charles, Edward Charles. I will be your examiner. So, Clara, who do we have here?"

"Skaikru." Clara stated, giving him a glance, then returned to staring at us.

"You're missing two?" Charles asked, he was looking at some sort of device and making notes, it was touch screen, like an iPad or tablet we'd been taught about on the Arc.

"They are in the changing rooms, sir, awaiting these, as you can see, these need to be showered and uniformed."

"Already chipped?"

"As soon as they came through, sir."

"Good, good," Charles looked up at us, "right, follow me."

 

Charles walked to the front of our line and began leading us down the side of the building to where we came at a stop, he put his hand out to the forest and we saw a ripple, "This is a force field," Charles informed us, "you cannot escape through the Cloud Realm, nothing can get out or in, you are safe." A door then opened in the brick work and we saw a tiled area, it had black floor tiles and white wall towels, with two other doors and a black bench in the middle. There was also lockers on the back wall. Charles gestured for us to sit down and we did.

 

"Right, so this is the shower chamber, put your clothes into the lockers and then walk through a door, Girls on the right and boys on the left. Once you get past the shower chamber you will be greeted by another set of lockers, these contain your uniforms and then sit down on the bench in that room and await me, see you soon," Charles said and then he exited. It was just Us.

 

"So what do we do now, Clarke?" Octavia asked, she was stood near the door Charles lead us through, although it looked like the door never existed. I was standing by the lockers, Bellamy next to me, Monty also stood by the entrance, Murphy had sat down and Raven stood on the right side of the room, leaning against the wall.

"I don't know, do what he says. We can't get back through that way," Clarke replied.

"What if we stay in these clothes? Try the door," Octavia suggested. Raven went to pull on the girls door handle.

"Locked," Raven stated, "they must be watching us, they must know when we... Aren't wearing anything."

"Cos that's not creepy at all," Murphy sarcastically laughed.

"How are we going to do this? I don't want to see my brother naked," Octavia huffed.

"Just, we'll go to the right, I guess and face the right, they go left and face left," I instructed.

"What if I wanna look?" Murphy smirked.

"Then I'll gouge your eyes out," Octavia spat.

"Noted," Murphy chuckled, holding his hands up in defence and heading to the left, I walked over to the left wall to, along with Bellamy. "How do we know when to get naked?" Murphy asked, a serious note to his voice.

"Now, if you want," I called, feeling awkward, we had all shared a lot of experiences together, but this was one I'd rather we didn't.

"Okay," Murphy shouted back.

 

I stared at the wall and removed my grey cotton jumper, I focused on the wall, nothing else. I didn't want to see anyone or anything. I took off my boots, and saw Octavia and Raven do the same. Everything was silent except for the sound of clothes and boots hitting the floor. The air felt cold as I took off my trousers and I left it there.

"So, um, so, do, do we take, do we take off our, um, underwear?" Monty nervously asked, stuttering.

"I think so," I called.

I nodded and stripped.

"We ready to go?" Bellamy asked, everything felt awkward.

"Yeah," Clarke responded.

 

I picked up my clothes and stared at the floor as I put them in my locker, the boys still faced the wall. Octavia and Raven copied me. I then placed my hand on the cold, metal handle of the door and opened it. We entered a dark room and couldn't see anything. The door slammed shut, making me jump.

 

"Hello, ladies," a female voice called and a light turned on, making me squint. I could see the room had three cubicles. "If you'd like to walk into a cubicle, please," the voice requested. I went in the one on the right, Octavia in the middle and Raven in the left one. A black panel came across, trapping me in the cubicle. I looked up at the ceiling and cold water shot down, I let out a small Yelp as the icy waters hit my skin. A gas then appeared in the chamber, it smelt of flowers. The front panel then opened and I was greeted by the familiar light and white tiles.

 

I saw Octavia and Raven. Octavia stripped of War Paint and tribal braids. Raven with her hair down and necklace from Fin. We saw three people in front of us, three tubs and three chairs. "Come, now, don't be afraid," a lady with pink hair told us. She walked up to me and grabbed my arm and gestured for me to sit in tub, I did. She scrubbed my skin with hard sponges until it went red, she shampooed my hair and then blow dried it. She then sat me in the chair and trimmed hair, she then plaited it for me, how it was on the Ark. I looked at Octavia, her hair had also been plaited in a side plait, but Raven's was in a bun. Octavia wasn't fighting. Playing along, I guess. I saw Octavia eyeing up the scissors, but she couldn't grab them. The ladies then left and told us to grab our clothes. We put them on and exited.

 

* * *

 

Once reunited our eyes examined each other's outfits. Me and Octavia dressed in a black vest top, black sports leggings and black trainers with a black rain Mac in our hands. However, Raven was dressed in white three quarter length, slim leg trousers, a blue long sleeve shirt and white ballet shoes with a white blazer in her hands. We stared at the boys, Murphy and Bellamy wore black sweat pants, black t-shirts and black trainers with black rain macs in their hands. Monty dressed in a white uniform similar to Raven's, white trousers, a white shirt sleeved t-shirt and a beige sleeveless jumper with beige shoes.

 

The sound of a door opening caught our attention and we saw a girl walking towards us, she dressed in a uniform similar to Raven's and as she got closer, Monty gasped, "Harper?"

"Monty?" Harper's voice called out and soon they were holding each other in a big hug. A tear rolled down Harper's face as she cried, "I thought you were..."

Monty pulled away, taking her in, she had cuts on her face, looking bruised and broken, "What are you doing here?"

 

We left Harper back on the Ark, she was devastated when she discovered Jasper's death. Her and Jasper were best friends, but I knew it was more than that on her side. She loved him. She tried to fix him, but he was too far gone.

 

"Well, now you've been reunited," Charles interrupted, we all stood and turned to look at him. Charles wasn't on his own, with him was Clara on his right and on his left was a girl dressed the same as me and Octavia. Her hair was as black as the night sky and her eyes blue as the ocean, but as vacant as the desert. Her hair formed a curly mane around her dark-skinned face. "Hello, so this is Clara," Charles pointed at Clara, "who you've already met. And this," he pointed to the lost girl, "is Rain. Now, as you've gathered, you're wearing different clothes. Those in white go with Clara-"

"What do you mean?" Monty interrupted.

"And those in black with Rain," Charles finished.

"Wait, we're being separated?" Bellamy questioned, stepping forward and then staring at us all, we all shared glances. Octavia stared at the floor, silent for once.

 

"What about Emori?" Murphy questioned, "You said I could see her!" Murphy growled and he marched up to Clara, he then grabbed her by the collar of her Blazer and threw her against the wall, "Where is she?"

"Murphy calm down," Bellamy shouted.

"Stay outta this!" Murphy growled, "Where is she? You said I could see her."

Bellamy took a step towards Murphy. The rest of us frozen. Rain was still facing us, unmoved.

"She's not here," Clara blurted out.

"What do you mean?" Murphy growled and he banged her head on the wall.

"She-She didn’t make it," Clara cried out, "there is no Emori. When we found you, you were being hunted by rebels. They shot her, killed her. We tried to bring her in, but sh-she didn’t make it." Clara cried.

Murphy dropped her. "She didn’t make it?" He repeated, then he turned to face us and he slowly walked to the back wall.

Clara softly said, “I’m sorry, John, she’s gone.”

I walked up to him as he slid down the wall. I crouched down and put my arm on his shoulder. Bellamy stood above us, Octavia turned around, her hands to her face as she watched. "Murphy, Emori, she's gone," Clara said. It shocked us all, me and Bellamy exchanging glances.

"So how come I made it? I saw you bring her in, I saw the guns. I didn’t see you. It doesn’t make any sense! How can she be dead when I saw her?!" He spat as a tear ran down his.

"John, you saw us taking her to surgery," Clara delicately, yet matter-of-factly, told him, “She died on the table.”

"She was the only one that understood me," Murphy mumbled as he put his hands over his face.

 

Charles then cleared his throat. "I know this is a sad time, but we've got work to be done."

"Why are we being separated?" Monty demanded, "you said we were safe and had tests."

"I did say that, I never said you'd be kept together," Clara explained.

"You lied to us!" Monty lunged at her, but Bellamy grabbed him and so did Harper.

"She's not worth it," Harper shook her head and the added, defeated, "We should listen to them."

"Yes, you should listen to us," Charles agreed, "Now, those in white, proceed with Clara and myself," Charles ordered. Monty looked at Raven and Harper, we all looked at Harper, seeing the harrowing in her eyes. Monty nodded, "We will meet again." 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is a little weird, it was inspired by The Hunger Games when Katniss was being bathed and waxed. I tagged The Hunger Games because a lot of elements in this story are similar to those in The Hunger Games (technology wise).
> 
> One of the main original characters is based off of Katniss actually - you’ll meet her properly next chapter.


	7. Stand

**_ Octavia _ **

 

Trust these people, play along, Clarke said. Well now there's five of us. We just watched them walk away. Murphy crying on the tiles, Clarke comforting him, Bellamy standing over them and then me, I just watch our friends follow that creep out the door. Whilst been left with some girl, who just stares into space.

 

It must've been 10 minutes, at least, since they left, and the room is silent full of Murphy's sobs. The girl just staring into space. I'm watching her, whilst Bellamy stares at Murphy as Clarke, is now, sat next to him, her arm around his shoulders. Fifteen minutes gone by and she moves. Rain moves. She walks across the room to Murphy, I stick my arm out. "What do you think you're doing?" I hiss at her and put my body in her path.

 

Rain just stares at me.

 

"Are you a mute or something?" I ask, surprised at her just staring and being quiet.

"No, I'm not," Rain calmly replied, "would you mind moving out of my way?"

"No. You're not touching him," I snapped.

"You can either move and remain unharmed, or you can end up on your backside," Rain said in a monotone voice.

"I'm not-" suddenly I felt a pain in my back and I was facing upward, my arm bent behind my back and Rain's blue eyes staring at me. I could feel my arm snapping, her knee jabbing the back of mine. One of her hands stabbing the middle of my back and the other holding my arm. Seconds must've passed.

"Let her go!" Bellamy shouted, I heard footsteps. And suddenly my butt hurt and I could see the black ceiling.

I heard Rose sigh and then I felt Bellamy pulling me to my feet. "I'm fine," I snapped at him. I saw Rain next to Murphy, Clarke stood on my right, Bellamy on my left.

 

We watched carefully.

 

"Murphy, I'm sorry," Rain apologised, Murphy looked up at her, "I'm sorry, I wish you weren't here," she then looked back at us, "I wish you all weren't here," then back at Murphy, "I'm sorry about Emori-" we then heard a slap sound and Rain's face moved to the right, I saw her move her hand to her cheek. "I deserved that," Rain mumbled, "Murphy, stand up." Rain said as she got to her feet. "Murphy, stand," Rain repeated.

"I ain't doing shit for you," Murphy growled as he spat on the floor. He had his knees up and his hands dangling off them. Murphy scowled at Rain's shoes.

"I don't want to hurt you," Rain sighed, "please stand."

 

* * *

 

**_ Murphy _ **

 

"I don't want to hurt you," Rain sighed, "please stand.” I looked up at her, at her face. Her dark complexion with a few freckles, her black hair in waves around her face and her eyes were a bright blue, but had lost the light. I bit the skin on my left thumb, staring at her. Behind her, I could see Octavia in between Bellamy and Clarke, all watching cautiously. I looked back up at her. She was frowning and I could see her eyes filling with water.

 

"Stand up!" Rain shouted.

I ignored her.

Rain stared back, "I'm sorry" she mumbled, she grabbed my hair and slammed my head back against the wall, "Stand Up!" Rain shouted and let go.

"Get off him!" Octavia roared and I saw her coming running to Rain. Rain quickly turned around and grabbed Octavia's hands. Nobody ever defeated Octavia. Rain then lifted her foot and kicked Octavia in the stomach. Octavia gasped and then fell to the floor as Rain let go of her hands and turned to me.

"Get up, you son of a bitch," Rain yelled, then in a quieter voice, almost begging, "don't make me do this, please get up."

 

I continued to stare and then a blow to the side. My face stung as it hit the cold tiles, my right side stinging, my left side against the back wall, both hands in front of me, I could see my own left hand in front of my face, black spots surrounding the edges of my vision. Clarke screamed out, her tone blending into the white noise ringing in my ears.

 

"Get the fuck up!" Rain demanded, then another sharp pain in my side and blood in my mouth, more black dots. I then felt a my head jerk up and saw her leaning in front of my face. She came to close to my ear and whispered, "All you have to do is get up, please, _please_ get up," then she moved away and shouted "Stand Up!" Before another blow to my ribs, she leaned in again, " _please_." I saw her eyes and a tear roll down her cheek. I saw my own blood on the floor and thought if I died now it wouldn't be that bad. This worlds a shitty place. But then her words, telling me to get up, the tears on her cheeks. Another blow, another whisper.

 

"Okay," I groaned, spit a mouthful of blood, "Okay," I repeated louder. Rain's face came back into my clouded vision, "Stand up," Rain weakly said. I put my hands on the floor and coughed and wheezed, my ribs killed, but I lifted my body off the ground and managed to push myself into a sitting position.

 

I could now see that Clarke was nursing Octavia and Octavia was staring at me. Bellamy just watched, but he couldn't come to me. I saw their lips moving, but heard no sound. "Stand up!" Rain demanded again, another tear falling as she went to slap me, I grabbed her hand. She stared at me, her eyes watery, red, puffy and wide. Startled. "Okay," I nodded. I clutched my ribs, I got on all fours and then pushed up, one knee forward. And then standing, resting against the wall. Rain bit her bottom lip, another tear falling.

 

I then saw her grab a remote and press a button, a glass wall came up and I heard them again. "Murphy!" Clarke called out and she ran towards me, past Rain. Me and Rain stared at each other. The others then came running, mumbling things, asking if I was alright, I didn't reply. I was locked in her sad eyes. Watching her. She batted away the tears, then returned to the silent, vacant expression. She walked away, "You have ten minutes," Rain told us, emotionless as she slowly walked over to the the far wall, leaning against it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So Rain is the character inspired by Katniss and you’ll see this further on in the story as Rain is the main original character.
> 
> Rain has dark skin, freckles, blue eyes and black hair. I can’t find an actress/model/singer I’d like to have play her, but I did find a couple images on google, so I’ll link them below:
> 
> 1) https://goo.gl/images/e6s3vS
> 
> 2) https://goo.gl/images/UqZNGS
> 
> 3) https://goo.gl/images/PhCN22


	8. Blood

**_ Murphy _ **

 

Rain leant against the door frame and it wasn't long until the others rushed over after the glass wall had been removed. Octavia and Bellamy grabbed my arms and lowered me to the ground, I looked up and then saw Bellamy taking off his shirt, "Jeez, Bellamy, I know we're friends, but I'm not ready for this," I lamely joked, taking pauses between words as it hurt to speak.

 

"Use this to clean up the blood," Bellamy ignored me as he handed his screwed up to shirt to Clarke.

"I'll take it," Octavia said as she grabbed Bellamy's shirt and crouched down beside me, she dabbed at the blood coming out my mouth and then I flinched as she touched the cuts on my face. Bellamy stood behind Octavia, watching Rain and Clarke was crouched down next to Octavia. I felt cold air hit my ribs as Clarke lifted my shirt and then her cold, soft fingers were on my fiery skin. "It's bruised, badly," Clarke stated as she examined my skin, I felt her prodding me, "how much does it hurt on scale of one to ten?"

"About a one," I sarcastically grunted.

"Be serious for once," Clarke sighed as she scowled at me.

"About a-aaaaaaahhh," I winced as she touched me right on my ribs, it brought a tear to my eye and I screamed again as she touched me, "still. A. One." I grunted, gritting my teeth.

"Is it broken?" I heard Octavia ask.

"I don't know," Clarke replied, and then she turned her face to Rain, "he needs a doctor."

 

Rain was leant against the wall and staring to the right, she didn't look at us, "You're a doctor," Rain mumbled.

"He needs an X-ray. What if it's broken?" Clarke frustratedly snapped.

"It's not broken," Rain numbly said.

"How do you-"

"It's not broken." Rain snapped and then she begun to walk towards us, Clarke, Bellamy and Octavia stood in front of me, blocking her way and my view, "Can you walk?" Rain called.

"I'm not sure," I grunted.

"Of course he can't, his ribs are broken!" Octavia exclaimed.

"Move out of my way," Rain demanded.

"No." Clarke refused.

"Unless you want to end up like him, I suggest you move," Rain threatened, I could see her legs were slightly open and her arms most likely folded.

 

"You don't scare me," Clarke stated as she took a step forward, they were about a foot apart.

"I'm only going to ask you once again, move out of my way."

"I already told you, no." Clarke firmly stated, everything was silent for a solid minute. Just the sound of breathing and stares.

The sound of a slap broke the silence. The blockage had been removed. Rain slapped Clarke, grabbed her arm, kicked her in the back of the knee, making Clarke fall. Rain held Clarke by the hair and pulled out a knife. The knife rested against Clarke's throat. Octavia stood up in anger and lunged towards Clarke, Bellamy pulled her back, forcing himself in between Octavia and Rain.

 

Bellamy put out his arm in between Octavia and Rain, "Easy, easy now. We mean no trouble," Bellamy said.

"Look, I don't have to keep you alive," Rain snapped, "I could kill everyone of you and nobody would question it. I could say it was an accident, you came to attack me, had to defend myself. Or I could just say that you were arguing with me, five against one. Nobody would question me. My job isn't keeping you alive. My job isn't keeping you safe, my job is seeing if you are eligible here by taking you through training. But if you happened to all die, nobody would give a shit."

"Then why don't you kill us?" Clarke questioned.

Rain stared at us, and then at Clarke, "Rule number one," Rain bitterly said as she brought the knife towards Clarke's arm and then as she sliced Clarke's skin she growled, "Don't question me." Clarke bit her lip as her eyes filled with tears and as her blood trickled down her arm. Rain then pushed Clarke onto the floor and took her knife wiped it on her top before cutting a piece off and chucked it at Bellamy, "Now can I see Murphy?"

Octavia ran back over to me, standing above me whilst Bellamy tied the cloth around Clarke's arm.

 

"Can you walk?" Rain asked, as she crouched down at my feet.

"I don't know, I'm in bad shape," I lamely laughed. Rain was dangerous, but I could see the water in her eyes as she stared at the floor whilst slicing Clarke's arm. I remember her tears falling to the floor as she kicked the shit outta me.

"You can stand. Can you walk?" Rain repeated.

I started to stand, Octavia helped me up, Bellamy and Clarke now stood around me.

"Walk." Rain demanded, taking a few steps backwards. I begun to walk forward, gripping my ribs as they screamed in agony. I followed her, I made it a quarter of the room before I fell. I expected to hit tile, but Rain caught me. We stared.

"Bellamy, Octavia, aid him. We can leave now." Rain instructed and then she let go, luckily Octavia and Bellamy caught me just in time. I put my left arm over Bellamy's shoulders, and my right over Octavia's, Clarke walked in front of us.

 

* * *

 

We exited the building and into the "outside" area, where there was a van waiting for us. Rain opened the back of it and gestured for us to get in. Clarke sat on the left side, behind the drivers seat. Bellamy and Octavia helped lift me in the van and Bellamy sat facing Clarke, I faced Octavia, who sat next to Clarke. Rain shut the doors. The back of the van had no windows and the only light was flickering in the centre of the van roof.

 

"Did you see her?" I asked Bellamy as the engine started up.

"See what? Her beat you up?" Bellamy asked, looking at me.

"Yeah, but like her face."

"What about her face?" Octavia asked.

"What is it, you get threatened by a girl and you love her?" Bellamy laughed.

"She was crying," I ignored Bellamy, "she begged me to stand up. And after hurting Clarke, her eyes seemed so lost and vacant."

"I think you're delusional, nobody in here is here to care for us. It's the Mountain two point O," Bellamy said.

"She almost killed you," Octavia interjected, "she almost killed Clarke. You heard what she said, we're not safe."

I shook my head and firmly said, "Yeah, but that's the point. Almost. She could've, but she didn't."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This story is quite violent, I must’ve had some pent up aggression back in 2016.
> 
> Also, this story isn’t doing as well as I thought it would, but oh well.


	9. Argument

_** Murphy ** _

 

The van pulled up after what felt like hours of silence. We got out to see a Four storey building, old fashioned brick building with a tower in the middle of it, making an extra storey. Behind us was a high electric and barbed wire fence. In front of us was a metallic, double door. Above it was a sign, made from metal and painted black: The Asylum.

 

Rain led us into the building and down a hall, before opening a door, which led into a courtyard-area, which had a three-storey building to the left and right of us. In between those two buildings was a plain field and where the buildings ended was another two buildings. On the left was a glass tower, ten storeys high. On the right was a one storey building with no windows. Rain led us into the building on the right, above the wooden door leading into the grey-stoned building, was a sign: Red Block.

 

Inside the building was a flight of brown wooden stairs. The floor was wooden. On my left was tables and chairs and at the end, kitchen appliances. On my right was a stable and a stack of hay. Inside the stable was a black horse called Midnight. Rain led us to the second floor and down the corridor above the kitchen area. She led us to the end and then opened a door.

 

Rain walked straight in the room and sat on a bunk single bed, which was directly to the left of us, going along the wall separating our room from the hallway. As you entered the room, there was a bunk in both the far corners of the room, a window and chest of drawers in between them. In the centre of the room was a brown wooden table with six chairs and at the foot of the bunk along the right wall was an archway leading to some lockers and a bathroom.

 

There was silence in the room.

 

Octavia walked to the bunk on the right and clambered to the top one and sat down, her legs dangling where the ladder was. Clarke sat in the bunk below, Bellamy claimed the top bunk on the left and walked me over to the one under it. Rain untied her hair, shaking it out as she stood up, "I'm going to shower." Rain disappeared into the bathroom, I heard the water hit the tiles, but five seconds later Rain reappeared, she leant against the back/bathroom wall. "I thought you were showering?" I raised an eyebrow.

"Look, I needed an excuse to talk to you-"

"Talk to us?" Octavia questioned in a bitter tone, "after beating us, you want to talk?" Octavia shook her head.

"Let her talk," Bellamy demanded, "what did you mean we're not safe?"

"I meant exactly that," Rain answered, she sighed and then looked at me, "I'm sorry for what I did, if I had another choice, I wouldn't have done-"

"You did have another choice," Octavia cut Rain off.

Rain stared at Octavia, Octavia glaring at Rain. Rain then looked at Bellamy and Clarke, "I never meant to hurt your friend. But this place is dangerous and I want to help you."

"So you've said," I rolled my eyes.

"Why are we here? What do you want from us?" Clarke asked.

"I want you to leave here. I want to keep you alive. But it's not what they want," Rain looked down at the floor.

"Who's they?" Clarke enquired.

"Charles, Clara. All the elders of the Asylum, the Cloud Dreamers. The ones who believe we need to be kept here to fight. Red block is the fighters," Rain looked up, first at me, and then she scanned us all, "you're job is to go into the Cloud Realm and fight-"

"Fight what?" Bellamy interrupted.

"Who knows? Grounders, each other. They want to control you, me included."

"Why?" I asked her, her eyes locked with mine, I see them cloud over.

"I've showered long enough," Rain ignored me, then she entered the bathroom, turned off the water and came back.

 

* * *

 

Evening. We're all in the downstairs area at our designated table, there's lots of other people our age in matching uniforms. We're being fed stew by some people from farm station. Rain refuses to sit with us. "What do you think this place is then?" Clarke asked, taking a spoonful of soup, she was sat opposite me, Octavia sat on my right and Bellamy opposite her.

 

"I have no idea, I told you not to trust it," Octavia sighed as she dipped a bread roll into her stew and took a bite.

"I know, but it seemed decent," Bellamy said, eating a piece of potato.

"I wonder what she meant, by the fighting," Clarke thoughtfully said as she took a swig of water from the metal beakers we'd been given, the bowls were also metal.

"I'm not fighting grounders," Octavia firmly stated, shaking her head.

"None of us are fighting," Clarke said, but she didn't seem convinced.

Bellamy nodded, "Agreed. And the most important thing, we need to find Monty, Raven and Harper."

Octavia sarcastically said, "Murphy will probably suggest asking his new girlfriend."

I rolled my eyes, "Take the piss all you want, but she cares. She was crying when she was begging me to stand up-"

"Murphy, you're vision was blurred, she enjoyed beating the shit out of you," Octavia rolled her eyes.

"No, she begged me-"

"Murphy-"

"Listen to me," I growled, stopping Octavia talking, I leant in the table, looked around, making sure nobody was near me, "she was crying. A tear fell when she cut Clarke. She was crying whilst she beat me and begged me to stand up. She's so distant. She referred to Charles as 'them'-"

"Just because you fancy her, doesn't mean she's to be trusted," Octavia said, "this place is not to be trusted-"

"Why? It's only like Lincoln-"

"How is this like Lincoln?!" Octavia snapped, I saw the fire lighting inside of her, her wrath.

"We didn't trust him. And he turned out to be on our side."

"This is completely different-"

"How is it? He was the enemy, _he_ was part of the Grounders, he _poisoned_ Finn-"

"Murphy, shut your mouth," Octavia growled.

"No, I won't. I trust her, like you trusted Lincoln, like Jasper trusted Maya. They're the same. Exactly same situation. Maya was a mountain man, Lincoln a grounder and Rain is part of this place."

"Rain is **not** the same as Lincoln." Octavia's fist clenched, "Take it back."

I shook my head, "No. I won't."

 

Octavia grabbed my shirt, and held her fist in front of my face.

"If Rain is bad then so was Lincoln."

"You son of a bitch," Octavia shouted, I felt the eyes of everyone in the room on us.

Bellamy stood up, "Octavia, don't. We have to stick together."

Bellamy reached a hand out to touch her shoulder and she swerved it, growling, "Don't you touch me." The room was tense, her fists still grappling my shirt, she searched my eyes before releasing me, she shoved me back and headed for the door of the canteen, yelling, "Go float yourself!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The argument at the end is kinda childish 
> 
> “Take it back”


	10. Different

**_ Monty _ **

 

Harper curled up in the foetus position as she slept on the double sofa bed of our room. Our room was a mini laboratory, it had a double sofa bed against the right wall and a three-seater sofa along the back wall, a small window above it. On the left wall was an archway leading into the study, which had a single computer desk against the back wall, with a bookshelf on the left of it and a large metal lab table in the centre of the room and a final door opposite the archway, which lead to a small bathroom. Within each room was grey stone tiled floors and painted white walls.

 

The only light source in the lab was a bright artificial light. Raven sat on a barstool under it as she sat with her legs underneath the metal table, papers littered all over it. Harper snored from the other room as I whispered to Raven, "Harper's wiped out."

Raven didn't even look up at me as she responded; she was too engrossed in a book, "Did she tell you anything about this place? Or what she was even doing out here?"

I shook my head, "No, she didn't tell me anything about this place or the people in it. But they don't seem good with the state she's in. Poor Harper, I was too caught up in my own grief to even consider the pain she was feeling. Imagine, getting the man you love out of the city of light, thinking you'd saved the world only to find yours destroyed. When I found him, it never even occurred to me that she might've found him first."

Raven looked up at me, her eyes sympathetic, "Monty, this wasn't your fault. You needed to grieve too, he was your best friend-"

"And she was in love with him. While we were having 'just saved the world sex' - Jasper was writing his letter and Harper was finding his corpse."

Raven slid off of the barstool, she pulled me into her arms, "Monty, it's not your fault."

 

I moved out of her embrace and took her hands in mine, "I know, Raven. I know it's not our fault. He chose to end his own life, we tried to save him but he didn't want to be saved. He chose to do this. I just wish things could've been different. Maybe if I had made him stay to drink with us, maybe if I had gone to get him instead of Harper, maybe things would've been different-"

"Or maybe he would've still done it, maybe not then but later, the day after, weeks after, months after. Who knows." Raven delicately said, "Monty, the world's ending."

I nodded, feeling my stomach sink. Raven was right, she always was. There was nothing I could do to save Jasper. But now I need to save the world.

 

Raven let go of my hand, turning to sit on her barstool, waving me over. We stood shoulder to shoulder, her warmth radiating from her, Raven immediately jumped into work. That's what I love about her, she's incredibly intelligent and she never gives up, she keeps working. She held up a notepad with scratchy writing, following it with her finger as she read to me:

 

“ _Something is wrong here. There's something in the air, the radiation, it's increasing. The Plants are breaking down, the plants are dying. Food is running out. And people, people aren't people. They're becoming infected, with a disease. It takes over. Consumes them within weeks of infection. They go crazy and then they die. No cure. No matter how many tests on healthy victims, there is never a cure. What will become of us when it ends? I don't want to die like that._ ”

 

"A.L.I.E told us about the Nuclear plants," I confirmed, "But what is the disease?"

Raven looked up at me, a little fear in her eyes, "I don't know. That's what I'm worrying about. Not only do we need we plan to leave the Earth, do we need a cure too?"

I sighed, "I hope not."

 

* * *

 

The sun pours through the window waking us up, we haven't left our room since we were put in it, it's been weeks. Food is delivered through a hatch - we're basically prisoners. Harper still won't tell us anything she knows. She barely speaks, she just sits in the living room, distant. I can't tell if it's the trauma of this place, Jasper's death or just everything we've all been through.

 

"She'll be okay." Raven told me as she sat around the metal table, as I stood in the doorway, watching Harper eat a bowl of berries for breakfast. Ours sat on the metal lab table, Raven kept picking at the berries as she kept scanning notes for any intel of the disease or the apocalypse, desperately trying search through paper document after paper document, the rates were literally 1 out of a 1000 documents contains relevant information. I'm not going to lie, lots of data we found was pretty interesting. The place we were in used to be some kind of mental hospital, it was incredibly old. The reason it survived was due to the technology developed the year before the world ended: forcefields, walls reinforced with metal sheets and the fact it was in the countryside. We found journals and patient documents, from as early as the 1700s, it was crazy. But also, not helpful.

 

"God, if I read about one more - Hey! Monty!" Raven cut herself, calling me over, "Monty!" I came running over to her, looking at the file in her hands, another patient file, but this was different:

 

_Patient Name: Rain Wolf_

_Patient ID No.: 0896-5891_

_D.O.B: 21/4/2131_

 

_Critical Incident (21/02/2150): Ms Wolf hosted a rebellion with a group of her friends, several girls died as a result. Ms Wolf is responsible for the death of over a hundred of our men. Ms Wolf has been sentenced to a week in solitary confinement and a medical assessment is in order after she murdered Willow Riley, suspected accomplice._

 

Additional Information: Clara Gardens, Delilah Jewel, Esme Jewel, Noah Clifford, Alex Smith, Hazel Smith, Newt Fielding, Hagan Hobson.

 

"Shit." I sighed, "What happened here?"

Raven looked concerned, "I have no idea."

"Here." Harper suddenly said, making both me and Raven jump as she appeared in the doorway, holding out a sheet of paper, in her tanned hands. I took it off of her, reading the crumpled sheet:

 

_Patient Name: Willow Riley_

_Patient ID: 0896-5884_

_D.O.B: 23/11/2130_

 

_Deceased: After the Critical Incident, 21/02/2150, Willow Riley was brutally murdered by accomplice Rain Wolf. Riley, was shot in the stomach and stabbed in the heart by Ms Wolf, we have no idea why this occurred. But Applegate Asylum falls silent to honour the death of such a talented young lady, Willow Riley will be cherished by all._

 

Me and Raven both looked at each other: what have our friends gotten themselves into?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What is going on here?  
> Did Rain really murder Willow or is there more going on here than meets the eye?
> 
> This chapter was written literally a couple days ago, originally there wasn’t much of Monty and Raven, I decided to change that in this story.


	11. Training

**_ Murphy _ **

 

Clang. Clang. Clang. I awoke to the sound of metal being hit by something and Rain shouting, "Wake up."

I slowly opened my eyes and I could hear grunts, yawns and moans. My ribs ached from the beating of yesterday and my eyes felt heavy. I was still dazed and sleepy as I came round from my slumber. Octavia was leant against the wall in between our bunks, Clarke sat up on hers and Bellamy was walking to the bathroom.

 

"You have ten minutes to get ready, there's an apple for each of you on the table," Rain explained as she pointed towards the table at the end of her bunk. I rubbed my eyes, and walked towards the showers. I changed quickly and then re-entered the bedroom, grabbing an apple. I chewed the apple and took a swig of water from a water bottle on the table. We were ready in five.

 

* * *

 

Rain led us out the door and we turned right, heading into the one storey building opposite the asylum. The building was small and inside had a ladder, Rain led us underground. The new room had black tiled floors and grey stone walls, no windows. There was a bathroom, a pool, weights, punching bags, pull up bars, treadmills and a white cuboid. Rain led towards the cuboid, where a man stood with blonde hair and blue eyes.

 

"Hagan?" Rain said, as she stared at the man in confusion, they were stood in front of the glass doors the cube, we were watching.

"Wolfie?" He asked, "where've you been?"

"They locked me up. After the... Incident, they locked me up. I've seen Clara, unfortunately," Rain explained to him.

"Look-"

"Not here," Rain cut in and then she looked at us, "this is my group. Newcomers, from the space ship. Alek was right."

"Yeah, he was," Hagan nodded, serious.

"Anyway," Rain said, turning to us, "this is a training simulator, watch and learn," Rain grabbed a belt of five knives,nodded at Hagan and walked through the glass doors, they shut behind her. "Every bullet feels real," she said, her voice coming through the intercom on the side of white cube.

"Ready?" Hagan called and she put her thumb up.

 

A mannequin popped up at the back her, she ran and slid under his legs, stabbing him in the back of his head. One popped up in the centre she ran and jumped ontop of his shoulders, and slit his throat. The mannequin went down under her feet, she crouched as two popped up at either side. She waited for the guns to fire and jumped over the bullets in time and watched as they entered the mannequins. One popped up behind her and grabbed her throat, she stabbed him in his hand and then in the head. One popped up at the back of her again, she ran and jumped on to his shoulders and dug the knife into his head, making he mannequin fall over. Another popped up, blocking the door. A gun fired and the door became covered in red 'blood', the door opened and all that was there was Rain, dropping to her knees, the gun falling from her hands. She stared at the floor and the gun. Lost in her mind.

 

Hagan ran in, "Rain? Rain, Rain," he repeated over and over again, shaking her. She was unresponsive, staring at the spot on the floor, clutching a locket in her right hand, the left hand placed on the floor, where she was staring. Hagan continued to shake her, we all watched.

 

"What's wrong with her?" Octavia whispered, she was stood behind me, Clarke in my right, Bellamy on Clarke's right.

"She never fired a gun or something?" I sarcastically said with an awkward chuckle, trying to lighten the mood.

"It's that look," Clarke begun to say, "the look of seeing a lost one."

"Maybe she's not so different after all," I said, my tone gentle.

"She's still one of them," Octavia disagreed with slight disgust.

"Yeah, and so are we," I snarled, looking at Octavia.

"We are not them." Octavia snapped, Clarke came to intercept us, placing a hand on each of our shoulders and turning Octavia away.

 

I diverted my attention to Rain, I watched her, closely. Clutching the locket as if her life depended on it. Staring at the empty space like she willed someone to be there. Hagan continuously shaking her and calling her name. People behind us watching Clarke and Octavia watching. I saw a single tear fall from her eyes and hit the floor. Another one started to fall and she wiped it away. She grabbed the knife, and threw it. It skimmed my head. I shit myself. It happened to fast for me to react. I turned my head and saw it hit a target behind me. I looked back and I heard a sob. She looked at Hagan and he pulled her up, he held her close. I felt water in my eyes. Why could I not stop looking at this girl? My ribs still ached from her beating, so why did I feel sorry for her? Why did I want to wipe away her tears and make her smile?

 

 

Rain noticed me watching her, She quickly dried her eyes and then she turned to face us, all of us staring at her. Her face turned cold, her eyes still watery, but her face hardened. She walked in between Clarke and me, barging me as she passed. She didn't even look at me. I watched her walk towards a bench and saw her sit down, her legs open, her elbows resting on them and her hands in front of her mouth, like she was praying. Her eyes stared vacantly at the floor in front. I don't know what took over me, but my feet started walking towards her, and before I knew it, I was sat on the bench next to her. I examined her face, her blue eyes were watery and red and puffy. Her cheeks were also red with tears and on her left cheek was a little scar.

 

"I think you need training with knives," I sarcastically said in a joking manner and then smirked, she didn't reply. "I bet that's how you got that scar," I begun, my voice lighthearted, "tripped and fell. Should be more careful." Still silence. I looked over to my group, Octavia had picked out a sword and was preparing for the cuboid training simulator thing. Hagan was saying something, Clarke, and Bellamy were listening intently. Clarke had her arms folded, I kept seeing her glance back at me. Bellamy was watching his sister picking up numerous weapons. There were swords, axes, knives, bows, arrows, maces, nunchucks, and various guns, from shotguns to machine guns, from rifles to handguns, from snipers to flamethrowers. So Many weapons, makes you wonder how they obtained them.

 

I looked back at Rain, still vacant. "So," I begun, awkward and struggling for words, "what... um... the... what's...-"

"Struggling for words?" Octavia asked, with a raised eyebrow and battle axe in her hands, as she walked over and sat on the other side of Rain, "not like you, you usually can't shut up."

"Aren't you meant to be going in there?" I said, pointing over to the training simulator.

"Yeah, I am, I've come to say you're next," Octavia informed me and then she stood up, looked at us, and then walked back over to the simulator and entered.

"So," I begun again. What do I ask her? The locket? The breakdown? "So, well-"

"You only know how to shoot guns?" Rain interrupted me, taking me by surprise, she still didn't look at me.

"Um, yeah, I mean, Octavia can use other weapons, she doesn't like guns. But, yeah, I use guns. I can use knives, but not as good as you," I gushed out, stammering and stuttering. What's happening to me? I'm usually sarcastic and shit, now I'm struggling for words?

 

"I can use more than knives. I can shoot with a bow, I'm pretty good," Rain told me, her voice flat and monotone. Her eyes still vacant and looking ahead.

"No need to brag," I rolled my eyes, playfully. I then saw her reach into the neck of her jacket and pull out a golden heart-shaped locket. My voice became slightly serious, "Where did you get that?"

"Get what?"

"That-"

"Murphy!" I heard a voice shout and I turned my head to look at Hagan, Octavia was putting her battle axe back, and in the corner of my eye I saw Rain put the locket away.

 

"What?" I asked.

"It's your time to enter the simulation. Come and choose a weapon," Hagan told me.

"Can't it wait? I'm sure Bellamy wants put some bullets in the back of their heads," I groaned.

"Murphy, I-"

"It's okay, Hagan," Rain cut him off, "Murphy is still in bad shape from his... injuries, so I'm going to do some shoot practice with arrows. They should learn stealth kills. Guns aren't always useful."

"If you're okay with it, Bellamy, I guess you can train next," Hagan begun to say and then I tuned him out.

 

Rain stood up and led me to the targets. She picked up a bow and a quiver with several arrows, she put the quiver on her back. She raised the bow to her face, and placed an arrow. She pulled back the string and fired. Bullseye.

"You're turn." She stated and moved out the way. I picked up a bow and an arrow, I lifted the bow to my face, copying what she did, and then I released. It hit the wall behind it.

"Better luck next time," Rain mumbled.

"Sorry I'm not perfect like you," I grumbled.

 

Rain ignored my attitude and handed me another arrow, she came stood behind me and began moving my arms and bow into place, "Stand straight, don't slouch," Rain scolded me, "Keep your elbow straight and up here. When I tell you to let go, let go."

I waited for her command.

"Now!" Rain commanded me, and I let go, it wasn't in the head, or the chest. It wasn't in the stomach or even the leg or foot. I hit the dummy in the hand.

"Better," Rain said with a slight smirk.

I begun to snap "Give me a gun and I can-"

"But that's not stealth, everyone will be alerted. And I doubt you could chuck a knife. Besides, archery is a very good skill because you can easy make a bow an arrow, you can't make a knife."

"Whatever," I grumbled, rolling my eyes.


	12. Whispers

**_ Murphy _ **

 

"Can we trust her?" Bellamy asked. Clarke, Octavia and Bellamy were all sat around a table in the middle of our room, wed finally been given a break from training. For the past few weeks our schedule had been:

 

_9:00 - 9:30 Wake up and shower._

_9:30 - 10:00 Breakfast_

_10:00 - 13:00 Training: Stretches, Cardio and Running_

_13:00 - 13:30 Lunch_

_13:30 - 17:00 Training: Targets and Combat_

_17:00 - 17:20 Showers_

_17:20 - 18:00 Dinner_

_18:00 - 20:00 Muscle Repair (Massages/Steam/Hydro)_

_20:00 - 21:00 Free Time (Usually Library)_

_21:00 - 22:00 Bed_

_22:00 - 9:00 Lights Out_

 

 

As I peered through the doorway, Clarke was sat down, Bellamy stood next to her, his arm on her chair and Octavia was leaning against her bunk. They were all discussing Rain. I was listening in to their conversation, looking through the gap between the bathroom door. Rain was in the showers behind me, a curtain separating us. Me and her both said we were going to shower, in different showers, obviously. Not that I wouldn't mind seeing a female body. I pressed my body against the wooden door and stared through the gap, listening in:

 

 

"She is one of them." Octavia bitterly said.

"But Murphy's right," Clarke begun to say, her voice calm, she was always the leader, "we thought all the Mountain Men were evil and Maya wasn't. We also didn't trust Lincoln nor... Lexa."

 

 

The room fell silent, it was easy to forget that Clarke fell in love with Lexa, she didn't speak about it much. I still remember the day it happened. She tried so hard to keep her alive, desperate to stop the blood and keep her heart beating. But nothing would work. She wasn't coming back. That was the day all of the troubles between me and the princess ceased, I was the only one there for her. I held her when she cried, I held her when she set Lexa's body alight, like she did with Finn. I think it's fair to say Clarke has lost the most here: Her Dad, Wells, Finn, Lexa... it's a miracle she's still breathing.

 

 

"So what then, Clarke?" Octavia asked, her tone still angry but somewhat more delicate and low.

Clarke shrugged, "I don't know. There's nothing we can do, we need Rain if we ever want to get out of here. She clearly hates this place and something bad is definitely going on-"

"So befriending her is the best way to go?" Octavia cut in, sceptical, to say the least.

Bellamy nodded, "The enemy of my enemy is my friend."

 

 

I suddenly felt something touch me and nearly jumped out my skin, I looked over my shoulder to see Rain standing there. She put her finger to her lips and gestured for me to be quiet. She was in just a white towel, the water still running in the background. Rain came and stood in front of me. The back of her head was pressed against my chest, just underneath my collarbone. Her body close to mine and I'd be lying if I didn't say I was fighting every urge to place a hand on her skin and share our warmth with each other. I missed Emori and part of me hated myself for looking at Rain in this way, but she was broken like me. An outsider like me. Is it really wrong to want that? That feeling of belonging?

 

Octavia sighed in defeat, "I hate to admit it, but you're right. If we're ever going to find our friends again, we need her. But I still don't trust her and I'm not going to play happy families." She then stood up, heading to the door.

Bellamy looked up at her, "Where you going?"

Octavia shrugged, "Nowhere for you to know."

Bellamy stood up too, "Octavia, if we are going to get out of here, you have to stop treating me like this. We need to work together, civilly."

Octavia folded her arms, snapping, "Fine. I'll be civil, but once this is over, we're done, Bellamy. I mean it." Octavia stormed out of the room, slamming the door behind her.

 

The room silent again, except for the water of Rain's shower.

 

Rain put a finger to her lips and then disappeared behind her shower curtain.

 

I sighed, stepping through the archway. Clarke still sat at the table, Bellamy pulled out a chair to join her. Clarke laced a hand over Bellamy's. I broke the tender moment, adding fuel to the fire, "Where's Octavia?"

Bellamy shrugged, tired, "I don't know."

I nodded, looking at Clarke and Bellamy, "I'm not interrupting, am I?"

Bellamy looked down at his and Clarke's hands, he let go of hers, "What is your problem, Murphy?"

Clarke looked at me, her eyes sad, she then looked back at Bellamy, "Don't, Bell."

I stepped towards them, resting my hands on the back of a chair, "I don't have a problem. Just making sure I'm not spoiling anything."

Bellamy rolled his eyes, leaning back in his seat and folding his arms, "Whatever, Murphy. Go bother someone who cares, we're not in the mood for your jokes."

I shook my head, feeling my own anger channeling, "I'm not doing anything. Just because Octavia is pissed at you for murdering her boyfriend-"

"Shut up, Murphy!" Bellamy yelled, jumping to his feet, slamming his hands down on the table, "Shut up!"

I threw my hands up in surrender, "All I'm saying is: don't take it out on me."

Bellamy stared at me, he shook his head and then he too stormed out of the door, Clarke hurried after him, giving me a scolding look.

 

 

"Boy, you do know how to clear a room," Rain laughed from behind me, making me jump as I didn't expect her to be there, I didn't even noticed she'd shut off the water.

I scratched the back of my head and mumbled, "Yeah, it's a talent."

"What was that about?" Rain asked me.

"Could ask you the same thing," I said, matter-of-factly as I sat down on my bunk, looking at her. She was now clothed and dressed in a grey vest top with black leggings that finished just after the knee and were slightly frayed. On her feet were black pumps.

 

"What do you mean?" Rain asked, defensive, she leant against Octavia's bunk.

"Just, what happened in the training simulator?" I asked, my tone suspicious, I looked at hands and picked some skin on the palm of my hand, before looking back at her.

"I, er, I destroyed some dummies," Rain smirked.

"No, I saw that," I shook my head, I put one hand on my upper thigh, bending my elbow and let the other dangle between my legs, "I meant after."

"I taught you how to shoot, and you were pretty-"

"Good. I know, I was pretty good," I smiled with a sarcastic laugh, and then my tone turned serious and I stared her in the eyes, "you know what I'm getting at. Why did you break down like that? Never shot a gun or something? You know they kind of bang when you shoot them."

"I don't know-"

"You know exactly what I'm talking about." I firmly stated, watching her. I could see she was becoming uncomfortable, feeling powerless. They always say that the person who stands up has more power, but in this situation, I had the power.

 

"Nothing happened." Rain half-snapped and then she walked closer towards me and leant in front of my face, so that we were eye level, and then she threatened, "just drop it. You don't want me to hurt you again."

I then laughed, I turned my face away from hers to the side and then back again, I then spoke, in a harsh tone, "Y'know, you don't scare me. So, you gave me a few bruises, I've faced worse."

Rain straightened up, "You don't scare me either-"

"So why are you so nervous to tell me what happened?"

"I'm not-"

"If you're not scared then why are you afraid to admit that you broke down? Why won't you tell me? Is it something to do with the locket?"

"Locket?" Rose asked surprised, and then tried to lie, again, with a small chuckle "what locket? I don't know what you're talking about."

"You know exactly what I'm talking about. I can only convince my friends to trust you so much, I could easy convince them otherwise, so you best start answering my questions," I threatened in a calm and level voice.

"I don't give a shit if they trust me or not. You don't scare me," Rain retorted, coming level with me again.

"They all think you've lost someone, and quite frankly it was evident on your face. You put on this act like you're some kind of unreadable robot, but it's bullshit and you'll crack. So, just tell me, who was it?"

 

Silence.

 

She stood straight again and begun to walk to the door. I stood up quickly and as her hand reached for the door handle I grabbed it, spinning her to face me, "You can't run from me or this," I stated, looking into her blue eyes that had become cloudy and watery.

I then said in a gentle manner, "Who was it? Mum? Dad? Partner?"

A tear fell on the last word and she looked away from my eyes.

"What was his name?"

" _Her_ name was Willow, Willow Riley."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Who is Willow Riley and what really happened to her?


	13. Reminiscing

**_ Clarke _ **

 

We walked into the woods above the training centre, and sat down on a log. The stars were shining bright above us, we faced the woods, the unknown. I sat with ankles crossed and my hands intertwined resting on my legs. Bellamy sat with his legs apart and his arms resting on his thighs, his hands dangling between his legs. "Why's he like that?" Bellamy groaned, bringing his head towards his upright hands, making his thumbs touch his temple and his fingers intertwining.

 

"He's been through a lot," I calmly said, my voice quiet and soft.

"We all have," Bellamy bitterly said.

"I remember when we first came here," I thoughtfully responded, changing the subject, "the excitement we all felt. Octavia going swimming-"

"And then that monster coming to attack her," Bellamy interjected, his voice sounding tired and husky, "I wasn't even there to protect her."

I continued to keep the tone light, "That's because you were starting the wrist band war with Murphy, he was your lap dog."

 

"I was a dick," Bellamy spat, staring daggers at the ground, "I turned so many people against each other. All of the violence and arguments because I shot the chancellor. I pushed O away with trying to protect her and myself. I always fuck up, always angry. I did the same with... with Pike..." Bellamy trailed off, hanging his head low.

"But once we came under attack and patched things up with the grounders and Lincoln, _you_ helped us." I tried to reassure him, rubbing his shoulder comfortingly and leaning close.

"I did awful things," Bellamy shook his head and put his hands between his legs, pained, "I tortured Lincoln because I was arrogant. I should've just listened to Octavia, I should've let her go. I knew she was smart and strong, I was just too selfish to tell her that. I was afraid she'd leave me. But now I've pushed her away."

 

I put a hand over his, "We both tortured Lincoln, Bellamy. We've _both_ done things we regret. But we do them together. We have to, we have to bare the guilt so that they don't have to. The Princess _and_ her King."

Bellamy shook his head, "You're wrong, Clarke. _You_ did what you _had_ to, to save us and the grounders," Bellamy looked forlorn as he guiltily admitted, " _I_ did it out of _spite_. I almost killed Raven because of my selfishness and Lincoln actually died because of it."

I shook my head, "Bellamy, you're wrong. You think you're a bad person, but you're not. You didn't kill Lincoln, _Pike_ did. One day Octavia will realise that and she will forgive you. But you need to forgive yourself and if you need forgiveness, then... I'll give it to you. I _forgive_ you."

 

Bellamy turned his head to look at me, searching my eyes in the darkness, "Do you forgive yourself?"

My forehead creased, "What?"

Bellamy repeated, "Do you forgive yourself? I told you to, and I meant it. But the reason you left after the Mountain was because you couldn't. But, Clarke, you _deserve_ to be happy. You deserve forgiveness. I was hurt when you left, I was jealous when I heard about you and Lexa. I told you I was angry for you leaving me, but I'm glad you did. I'm glad you left because you met Lexa and you found a glimmer of happiness and that's special, Clarke."

I looked away from him, feeling tears in my eyes, "It hurts, Bellamy. It hurts so much. I loved her."

He put an arm over my shoulders, "I know, I know."

My tears rolled down my cheeks, I heard his heart beating in my ear as I leant against him.

 

I don't know whether to use my heart or my head.

 

My heart wanted Bellamy. I loved him. I loved him like I loved Lexa, but at the same time differently.

 

My head told me no. Told me I was cheating on her. Told me that even if it wasn't cheating on Lexa, Bellamy would end up getting hurt like Wells, like Finn, like Lexa. Like everyone else I love.

 

"Bellamy?" I said, breaking the silence, looking at him with tear soaked cheeks.

Bellamy's forehead creased, "Clarke?"

I smiled, "Right now, I don't feel like being around anyone I actually like."

Bellamy huffed and smirked, "Even after all this time you still don't like me, Princess?"

I shrugged, playfully, "Does Anyone?"

Bellamy rolled his eyes, "I know you like me, Princess, you liked me back then. You just didn't want to admit it. In fact, I would even say you love me."

I raised an eyebrow, "I love you?"

"I love you too, Princess." Bellamy smoothly said, smiling like a little boy.

I laughed, "Wow, so smooth."

He shrugged, "It's true." His tone then became more sincere, perhaps even a little nervous as his eyes held on to mine, "I love you, Clarke."

I felt my chest quicken, nerves holding me hostage. Butterflies even. I couldn't think. So instead, I acted. I brought my face to his, he held a finger under my chin as our lips locked again. Still gentle and soft. His hands moved to my waist, mine moved to his face, pulling each other closer. I moved my body to sit on his lap, our lips desperate for each other. Our lungs sharing oxygen and exchanging carbon dioxide. His hands ran up and down my body, his stubble on my face. My hands ran through his hair. I allowed myself to be in the moment. I let everything go. I _wanted_ him. I want Bellamy.

 

I'll always love Lexa. But she would want this, she would want me to be happy. And in this moment, I was the happiest I'd been in a while.

 

I liked Finn.

I loved Lexa.

I love Bellamy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I actually edited quite a bit of this chapter, before it was a little repetitive and with less emotion. Now there’s more detail with how Clarke is feeling and the description of the kiss.
> 
> I’m surprised we haven’t had a season 6 trailer yet.
> 
> I don’t think Bellarke will become canon, I think Jason likes to bait the fans with it. I don’t mind Becho though, I shipped Bellamy and Echo in season 2, but in all honesty I didn’t realise Echo was the girl in the mountain lol, but I totally shipped Season 2 Becho. Also I’m sure there’s a rumour of Clarke having a new love interest in season 6?


	14. Porridge

**_ Murphy _ **

 

Here we are, sat at our table eating lumpy porridge. Octavia silent as ever as she dug at her porridge, Rain looking everywhere but at our table with a worried look on her face, and me? Well, I'm just shovelling disgusting porridge into my mouth. Things are still shaky after last night and Bellamy and Clarke still haven't showed up yet.

 

"Where do you think they are?" Octavia asked me.

"I thought you didn’t care about Bellamy anymore?" I raised my eyebrow at her.

Octavia folded her arms, looking away with me, “I don’t.” She then looked back at me, “Clarke is missing too and if they get in trouble, it affects _all_ of us.” Octavia looked at Rain, "What will happen to them?" 

 

"What will happen to who?" A voice asked.

"Bellamy!" Octavia cheered, briefly forgetting her hatred for him, but she soon remembered her feelings as she hissed, "I thought you were dead! Where were you?"

Bellamy pulled out the chair on my left and sat down saying, "we just went into the woods."

Clarke nodded as she came and sat opposite him.

"The woods?" I repeated with my eyebrow raised looking at them, with a smug smile on my face.

"Yes, the woods," Clarke snapped at me.

"Woah, calm down, Princess," I smugly said, I then continued, looking at my porridge and casually saying, "so, the woods? Is that like, I don't know, the _bunker_?" I looked at Clarke with a raised eyebrow.

"We just fell asleep." Bellamy sternly said.

"Okay," I slowly said, with a slow nod, turning back to my porridge, "so, you just fell asleep. Like Bellamy ‘just fell asleep’ in his tent with two other girls?" I winked at him.

"Murphy, what is your problem?" Bellamy snapped, "why are you being a dick?"

"I'm not," I said, holding my hands up in surrender.

"Just ignore him," Clarke muttered, shaking her head.

 

We all fell into silence, the only sounds were coming from other people. And the spoons clanging on the bowls. I looked at Rain, she'd stopped eating. She was staring at something in the distance, her eyes locked on it, as if it was prey. I couldn't follow her gaze and what she was looking at. Rain she suddenly stood up, making her bowl wobble and spoon fall out.

"What's wrong?" I asked her, cautious. We were all looking at her. She didn't reply.

 

Next thing that happened, she jumped over the table, sliding across it and was pushing through the crowd. I looked at them. And they nodded, we stood up and we were running after her, shoving people out the way.

"You bitch!" We heard her shout.

The crowd was in a semi circle around her and as we broke through it, Rain was laid on top of a girl with blonde hair and brown eyes, Clara. Clara had a bloody nose and bust lip. Rain had punched her. I assumed she grabbed her from behind, spun her around, grabbed the tops of her shirt and threw her on the ground, where she proceeded to punch her in the face.

 

"You killed Her!" Rain spat at her.

"It wasn't me, I swear," Clara pleaded, "I promise you, it wasn't."

"Bullshit!" Rain shouted, punching her again.

Clara screamed in pain and then cried, "Wolfie, I swear it wasn't me! I wouldn't betray you like that."

"But you were captured! You got Her KILLED!" Rain roared, punching her again.

"No! No I didn't," Clara shouted and then more calmly, "if I stitched you up, why would I have let Noah go? When he's a cheating, lying bastard! Tell me that? It wasn't me," Clara shook her head, and then she looked towards the entrance towards the food hall. I followed her gaze and saw them coming. The guards, heavily armed.

 

"Rain, we've gotta go," I shouted to her, panicked, I rushed over to her and tried to pull her off Clara. Rain just stared at her, blank.

"Bellamy, help me!" I shouted to him as I looked at him.

"Okay," he answered and me and him pulled at Rain's arms, lifting her off of Clara. I looked around the room. Shit they're so close, how do we get out?

"Over here!" Octavia shouted and we looked at her, we followed her into the kitchen. The cooks pressed against the wall, terrified. One of them leaned forward and swiped a knife. It cut through my leg, making it bleed. I screamed as I fell on the floor.

Clarke was in front of my face, "Bellamy, help Murphy, I'll help Rain." Bellamy let go of Rain, putting his arm under me and helped me to hobble out the door. Rain rejected Clarke's help, kickstarting into gear as she booted the back door open, leading us again.

 

"Where are we going?" Octavia asked us, her voice fast and worried.

"This way," Rain croaked, then more firmly, "This way!" She took the lead and was running through the forest, followed by Octavia and Clarke and then Bellamy carrying me.

 

We ran through the trees, we had no idea where she was taking us, she just kept running and running. The sky gradually getting brighter as noon came around. We were tired and my leg killing me. I was sweating and drained. The trees around me started to go black.

 

Leaves crashed into my face, scraping my cheek against a tree root. I groaned in pain.

 

"We have to stop," Clarke demanded and I saw her feet walking towards me, she rolled me over. I saw the blue sky aboveme and felt Clarke's hands around the cut on the front of my left calf. She tore away some of the trouser material.

"We should be fine here," Rain mumbled. "We can't see the building, so we're far enough."

"So now what do we do?" I heard Octavia snap at her. I moved my head to look at the right, where I could see Rain and Octavia looking at each other, standing centimetres apart.

 

 

"I don't know," Rain weakly said, shaking her head and turning away from us.

Octavia demanded an answer, "Well, are they going to kill us? Our friends?"

"Probably," Rain sighed, she didn't seem really bothered as she raked a hand through her hair.

"When have we not been hunted though?" I weakly laughed and they looked at me, "I mean we were criminals on the Ark. And down here, hunted by grounders, each other, the mountain, the city of light and monsters. So when have we not been hunted?"

They all ignored me, turning back to face to Rain.

 

"Rain," Clarke said, her tone firm, "do you have a knife?"

"Why?" She suspiciously responded, looking at Clarke.

"I need to cauterise his wound, he's losing lots of blood," Clarke explained, her hands were at both sides of my gash on my leg, which was still bleeding, "we also need water," Clarke said, "to keep him hydrated."

"So we need a fire?" Rain asked.

Clarke nodded.

"Bellamy," Rain said, looking at him, "could you get us some logs and build the fire?"

Bellamy nodded, disappearing into the woodland to get branches and twigs.

 

Rain also started walking off, but Octavia of course yelled at her, "Where are you going?" Octavia questioned, standing up and walking towards Rain.

"I'm going to get water," Rain said flatly, looking straight ahead.

"I'm coming with you," Octavia stated, as she begun to walk forward. Rain sighed and they headed off together.

 

It was silent apart from the distant snapping of branches coming from Bellamy braking branches in the distance. The birds tweeted in the trees. The world was still and calm. This was the first time I properly noticed the Earth and its beauty, before now, I had no time to stop and take it in due to the constant battle. _Get a grip, Murphy, don’t start getting all mushy._

 

"Just me and you, Princess," I weakly mumbled, "how many times have we been here?"

"Too many," Clarke sighed. She's right, we have been here too many times. Too many times on the run and too many times wounded. Even though we've always had arguments and feuds, The 100 have always had my back, well, when they weren't trying to hang me or banishing me. But I guess we make a team, when all things are put aside. We come together when it's necessary. Pumping Ontari's heart to save Clarke. Gross.

 

"Do you think she's actually dead?" I mumbled.

"Who?" Clarke asked, and then she sighed, "they better hurry up."

"I got the branches," Bellamy said, half-jogging over.

"Build a fire," Clarke instructed.

"On it," Bellamy said and I watched him build a small fire in front of me.

"Emori," I mumbled, responding to Clarke. I felt so weak and my eyes shutting, I knew I mustn't fall asleep.

"What do you think?" Clarke gently asked.

"I don't think she is, we've come all this way, I think they're lying," I weakly said.

 

Nobody responded to me. I watched Bellamy twizzling a stick in the ground, trying to light the fire. My body was dripping with sweat and my vision blurry.

"Finally!" Clarke exclaimed and I looked over to see Rain walking over to me. She got a stick out of her pocket and knelt in front of my face.

"You might want to bite this," Rain suggested.

I shook my head, "I've been through way worse, trust me."

Octavia nudged Rain out of the way and put a bottle of water against my lips, she gently tipped it and I drank it. It tasted bad, but at least it's clean. Rain lifted her coat and pulled out a small knife from her waistband, she heated it on the fire. Shit. I knew what was coming. I've never had a wound cauterised before, but i have been hanged, three days of grounder torture, plus some more and parading through a desert, it's been a long journey.

 

Rain handed the knife to Clarke, I saw Clarke's hand grip it and I looked at her, her hand hesitating over my leg wound. I looked back towards the fire, I couldn't look. My palms became sweaty from nerves. I knew this was going to kill me. Rain lifted my head onto her lap and knelt at the the top of me. She then grabbed my hand. I don't know why she's doing this, but I'm too weak to care. I looked into her eyes, her eyes were more of an ocean blue with some flecks of green in them, unlike mine, which were a baby blue colour, like the sky. _What am I talking about? Eye Colour?_   _Jesus, get a grip, Murphy._ I think the blood loss is messing with my head.

 

"Murphy, this is going to hurt," Clarke said to me.

"It's okay," I mumbled and then I gritted my teeth, "just do-" I didn't even finish my sentence before it was cut off by screams. It burned. It hurt so bad. A tear fell down my cheek. "Fuck," I grunted. And closed my eyes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So frequently in this story I make the characters recall events from previous seasons, in all honesty I wish The 100 looked back more. I think Murphy has had the most significant and changing story Ark and I’m glad he’s finally found a place among The 100.


	15. Stories

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: Mention of sexual assault/rape in regards to talk of Season 3 Murphy and Ontari.

**_ Murphy _ **

 

I opened my eyes to be greeted with a dark sky and stars shining above. I looked to my left to see Clarke asleep in Bellamy's arms, resting against a tree. Octavia was asleep on the other side of the fire, opposite me. They were sleeping on a pile of leaves with fur blankets, the animal carcasses were on the fire, cooking.

 

I slowly sat up, pulling my knees to my chest, across from me was Rain, she was sat against a tree, turning a stick into an arrow and she chucked it on a pile. She looked at me.

"Hey," she whispered.

"I've been asleep awhile," I yawned, I looked at my leg, it had a leaf covering it.

"It should be fine," Rain smiled at me.

I noticed she was shivering and realised it was quite cold, I had a fur blanket on me too, but Rain didn't. I got up, my leg hurting, but it'd be fine. I slowly limped over to Rain and sat down beside her. I sat with my legs up to my chest and the blanket covering my legs as well as Rain's, which were crossed. My arms rested on my knees, my right hand in a fist and the left one over it. I messed with my thumbs. Rain held a stick in her hands and rested them on her lap.

 

"Thanks," she whispered.

"You're cold," I smiled, I looked at her as I covered her legs with the blanket, "I can't let you shiver."

"You're so kind to me," Rain smiled, shaking her head, and then she looked at the floor, "the others hate me - especially Octavia."

"They don't hate you," I told her, shaking my head, and then I looked at the angry orange flames, "things didn't used to be this way. We lost a lot of people and it changes you. Sometimes for the worse, like with Octavia. Sometimes for the better, like me. I haven't always been nice."

"I know you annoy Clarke and Bellamy, but you're still nice," Rain defended me, looking at me. I looked into her blue eyes and shook my head.

"No. I was horrible. When we first came to the ground, me and Bellamy ran things... with fear," I looked at her and smirked, "I pissed on a guy," I shook my head. I wasn't proud.

 

"Why?" Her blue eyes full of curiosity.

"He wasn't 'working hard enough.' He wanted a water break, so I gave him water." I looked at her face, she didn't seem to be bothered, "it gets worse," I said to her. Looking away, staring at the fire, I began to explain, "They tried to hang me-"

"What did you do?" Rain asked, she had now turned her body to face mine, bending her legs, her hands on top them, touching my sides.

"Nothing," I bitterly laugh, "they blamed me for killing someone, it wasn't me. It was this girl - Charlotte-"

"What happened to her?" Rain asked, she was now playing with a piece of loose hair and intently listening.

"She was young, twelve or thirteen, I don't know," I shook my head and then looked away from her eyes, staring at the flames, "I chased after her, said she needed to pay. She jumped off a cliff," my tone remorseful, "I never meant for her to die, I just wanted - I don't know what I wanted." I began to pick the skin on my palms, "Anyway, after that, I got banished and Grounders tortured me, three days before I broke. They let me go, infected me with a disease. It got the camp. When I was chasing Charlotte, these four guys were there, they left me on my own," I bitterly laughed, "I killed two of them."

 

Rain was staring at me, I looked into her eyes, "Think I'm a monster yet?" I asked her with a raised eyebrow.

"No," Rain shook her head.

"Well, I tried to hang Bellamy, get revenge, I almost succeeded. But they managed to Hotwire the door and they'd have killed me. So I blew a hole in the drop ship and ran. I got caught by the grounders again and tortured. They let me go."

"I think you're brave," Rain softly told me.

I shook my head, still not meeting her eyes.

 

"What changed?" Rain asked.

"What do you mean?" I asked, looking in her eyes, I expected her to be hateful or disgusted, but she wasn't.

"Why did you stop being against them?" Rain gestured to Bellamy, Clarke and Octavia.

"Well, I went back to the drop ship, after Clarke and others had been captured and I found Raven. She was dying, I was dying. I helped prolong her life. I didn't wanna die alone," I looked at the floor, and then at her, "I didn't ask to be hated."

"I don't hate you," Rain said.

"Anyway, the final straw, I saw Finn, he was angry, out of his mind, looking for Clarke. He murdered eighteen people. I told him to leave, he kept pulling the trigger. And then he died." Of course there was more to that story, like how Raven tried to get me to take his place, I felt betrayed. I thought I was finally part of the group, only to find out that she was using me. But I guess I deserved it after what I did to her.

 

"That's horrible," Rain softly said.

"Yeah, but I wasn’t wanted at the ark, I don’t blame them, so I left to find the city of light. It doesn't exist; it's some crazy drug trip," I laughed, and then my tone softened, "it's where I met Emori, she had a knife to my throat. I gave her water, she showed me her hand. It was damaged due to radiation, I told her I didn't care. And I didn't. She was the second person in my life that I ever loved. I miss her," I looked at Rain, her face had become sad too, "I don't think she's dead. She can't be, I already almost lost her to the crazy AI shit, but I got her back. I fought so hard for her, for us. I'd go through hell if it meant I could hold her hand."

"You're already there," Rain muttered and she looked away from me, a tear trickling down her cheek, she quickly wiped it away.

 

"I slept with someone else," I bitterly said, scowling at the fire, reminiscing my time with Ontari. I never wanted to sleep with her, I hated her touching my skin, but I had to. I didn't want to, but she threatened my life. I was her slave. Emori wasn't mad when I told her, when I found her in Polis. She understood it wasn't my fault.

"Why? You love her so much," Rain asked, looking back at me.

"Ontari, this person in charge, had me chained up, threatened me, so I gave in. I told her there was someone else, Emori, but Ontari kept going. I didn't want to," I looked her dead in the eyes and growled, "I hated the way she touched my skin and the scent of her perfume. But I had to. I hate myself for it, but if I didn't-" I broke off and scowled back at the fire, and bitterly muttered, "if I didn't, I'd be dead."

 

I shook my head, guilt swarming me. I regretted so much the nights I spent with Ontari, I hated every second of it. At least Emori understood, she always understands.

 

She's the only thing that matters in this shitty world and I will find her again.

 

Rain looked at me, like she was about to say something, when a branch snapped in the distance.

 

Rain quickly got into a crouched position, grabbing her crafted arrows and bow, gesturing for me to be quiet. Rain wasn't the only one who noticed the sound, Octavia also woke, reaching for her sword. They both stood ready as a figure, all in white appeared. She held her hands up as her shadow filled with colour from the light of the fire. He blonde hair tied up in a bun and her eyes fearful, "Wolfie, please."

Rain bolted up right, standing with the fire in between them, "You betrayed me. I should kill you."

Clara ignored her, her eyes looking at Octavia's, "I can help your friends."

"How?" Bellamy croaked, as he woke, he too got to his feet, helping Clarke up.

Clara explained, "I know where they are and I can get them with as little questions asked as possible, but I need protection."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One of things I have a negotiated feelings towards in The 100 is Murphy’s situation with Ontari. I liked that The 100 mentioned male rape/sexual assault (the law is wrongfully bias in this case, claiming only women can be a victim of rape, of course it’s not true). However, I wish they had more conversation about it, but it’s quite progressive. Along with jasper, a male, suffering from depression, as in today’s society we still need to break stigma around male mental health and abuse/rape survivors. 
> 
> I also like that Clarke is bi as there are few bisexual characters, that are empowered women and are not just sex-crazed, but still allows women to be empowered and not judged for having sex. Women are viewed as complex people, not just sex objects, and that is good for TV shows. 
> 
> The 100 is good when it comes to female representation and representation as a whole, I think.


	16. Tunnels

**_ Octavia _ **

 

"Where we going?" I grumbled, we'd been walking through the woods for ages, it felt like hours. My torch was almost out, and my mouth dry.

"Almost there," Clara half-snapped. I had to bite my tongue in order to not rip into this snobby woman. I was on a job and a warrior must be patient, prioritise their battles and picking one with Clara would not be worth it right now.

 

Rain remained silent. Clara put her hand up and her finger on her lips. I didn't see any buildings or people in the area, so I rolled my eyes. Clara moved her foot in the ground, scattering the leaves, until we heard a little bang. She bent down and grabbed a metal handle on the floor, she pulled it up, Rain ran to help her hold it up. "We go in here," Clara instructed, and then she looked at me, and half-snapped, "Would you hold this for us?"

I stared at her, and sighed, "Sure thing."

 

I walked over and propped the metal hatch open, it was heavier than expected. Clara then lowered herself into the hole, Rain passed her my torch. Rain looked at me, "I know, she can be a bit... intimidating," Rain said to me, giving me a sympathetic smile.

I looked at her, keeping silent. I didn't trust either of them and I wasn't here to make friends, I was here to find Monty, Raven and Harper.

 

Rain turned back around, hopping down the hatch. I looked around and found a rock to keep the door open, I then lowered myself into the darkness, hoping that this wasn't some kind of trap.

 

"Finally," Clara huffed, as I landed on the concrete floor. She turned back around, leading us down a long corridor. It was pitch black, a part from the light from the torch. The floors and walls were made of grey stone, and there was cobwebs and spiders running around. We could hear voices from either side of the walls. "What is this place?" I whispered.

"It's a secret passage," Clara stated, "when I disappeared for a week, I wasn't kidnapped or captured, I was exploring all the passages, trying to find one leading to the exit. Once I went to get you, you'd already planned an escape. I met the others before they left." I had no clue what Clara was talking about and frankly I didn't care either.

 

"Is there an exit?" Rain asked her. We were walking quite quickly to wherever Clara was taking us.

"Not a secret one," Clara sighed, and then she came to a stop.

"Why've we stopped?" I briskly asked.

"Maybe because this is where Esme is," Clara snapped, scowling at me.

 

"And who is esme?" I snapped at her, "you said you were taking me to get _my_ friends."

Clara walked up to me, centimetres between us, she bitterly said, scowling, "Yes, and we will. But we need Esmé first!"

I looked her up and down, "You best be telling the truth otherwise you're dead."

Clara's jaw clenched, "I'm not afraid of you, so I'd stop threatening me because I don't have to help you. And if you try anything," she pulled out a handgun from her belt, pointing it at me, "Know that I'm good shot."

 

Clara then stiffened and Rain stood behind her, "And remember I'm quicker, so you hurt us or betray us, this time, I'll kill you." Rain then stepped back, flames bouncing off of her knife, "Now, Get Esme and give me the gun."

 

Clara turned around, handing Rain the gun. She then pressed up against the wall the left wall and gestures for us to copy. Rain took her place behind Clara, me behind Rain. Clara put the torch on the floor and then she pushed a rock in the wall. The wall parted in front of Clara, and revealed a metal door. It was tiny and we'd have to crouch to walk through. Clara held up her fingers and counted down from three. On one she opened the door.

 

We barged in.

 

The light stung my eyes. Struggling to focus, the white tiled floor and walls came into view. In front of us was a black sofa facing a TV. To my right was a double bed with white silk covers, wooden bed posts and head boards. There was girl sat on the sofa, she had bright ginger hair that was cut short, in a tousled bob. It wasn't tidy and the rest of her hair, two plaits, were scattered on the floor next to me, on my right, in front of a full length mirror, which had a crack in it. Her eyes were green and her skin was pale, her features identical to Delilah's. She quickly got to her feet and stared at us. First in disbelief and then complete horror.

 

"Wolfie-" the girl begun to say, but was cut off by Rain jumping over the sofa and shoving the girl against the wall, smashing her head on the TV.

"Shut it Esmé!" Rain growled, she got her knife from her waistband and pressed it against Esmé's throat.

"Rain, please listen," Esmé pleaded, her eyes wide and full of fear, she put her arms up in surrender.

Rain shook her head and snapped, "Whilst we're escaping and getting tortured and killed, you're living in here!"

"No, no. It's not what it looks like!" Esmé shrieked, and then she looked at Clara, "What have you told her?"

"The truth," Clara firmly stated, giving a look as cold ice.

"Rain, please, I had to!" Esmé pleaded.

"You didn't have to rat us out," Rain snapped, "Tell my why I shouldn't kill you for betraying us."

"I didn't betray you," Esmé pleaded.

"Bullshit!" Rain shouted, and she grabbed hold of Esmé and shoved her into the wall to her left, Esmé smacked her head on it and gasped.

 

"Please! It wasn't my fault!" Esmé shouted, her eyes clouding over.

"Did they have a gun to your head?" Rain snapped, "I would never snake us out. Why'd you do it?"

Esmé had tears pouring down her face, "I didn't say anything, you have to believe me."

"No," Rain shook her head, "If that was true, we would've got away. But instead, Willow is dead, because _you_ couldn't keep your mouth shut."

"Because of _me_?" Esmé's eyes widened, "I didn't do anything!"

"Then how come the guards found us because of you?" Rain spat.

"They caught me. That's all, I never said shit. I just said we knew about the radiation and the experiments. They kept me locked up for three days and told me they'd killed Noah. They showed me his body," Esmé cried, tears started to come from her eyes, "I never told them about you trying to escape, I didn't have to; they told me they already caught you!"

"Bullshit!" Rain snapped, "You betrayed us!"

"No!" Esmé argued, crying, "They captured me, the night before we were set to leave, said another source had come to them. They locked me up for three days and tortured me. Until they came back and said that it was too late. They said they killed all of you."

"Then why are you alive?" Rain bitterly said, her knife still firmly over Esmé's throat.

Esmé shook her head, "Because, the only way I could keep Delilah alive..." Esmé trailed off and looked at the floor, tears pouring from her eyes, and then she looked at Rose, "The only way I could save my sister was by... by... by giving myself to _him_." Esmé looked at the floor. And I stared at her.

 

What the fuck is going on here?

 

Rain stood back, staggering. She dropped her knife. Staring at Esmé. Esmé slid against the wall, her knees up to her chest, her hands covering her face. Tears streaming down. "I'm sorry," Esmé sobbed, "I thought you were dead. They said they already knew you were escaping. I told them we knew about the experiments after Charles whispering in my ear whilst his men dug knives into me and beat me... and then he showed me my sister. I had to save her. That's why I'm in here," then she bitterly laughed, "easy access."

Rain stared at Esmé, she was in shock, she stared at her. I stared at her. The room silent.

 

Esmé looked at Rain, tears still pouring down her face, and she held out her hands, "I didn't mean for any of this."

Rain was silent. Still staring at the poor girl in front of us.

Clara broke the silence, her voice harsh, "Yeah, well, Willow died because of you. Because you snitched. And Delilah is dead too."

Esmé stared at Clara and slowly got to her feet, "What?" Esmé cried, her forehead creasing.

"Delilah is dead. You may as well have kept your mouth shut," Clara snapped.

Esmé looked at Rain, "Is it true?"

Rain nodded, and then she put her hands under her hoodie and she pulled off a black rope necklace with a seashell on it, she held it out. Esmé slowly walked over and grabbed it. "No," Esmé mumbled, barely audible, and then she fell to her knees, clutching the necklace, "no, no, no, no," Esmé repeated over and over again, "he promised," Esmé then looked back at Rain.

 

Rain looked at Clara, "We're done here," Rain weakly said and turned to walk out the door. Clara exited first, and then me, Rain stood watching Esmé in the door way. Rain then mumbled, her voice hoarse and croaky, holding back tears of her own, "You can come with us."

 

Esmé stared at her and then she stood up, she stared in Rain's eyes, and pleaded "Kill me." Esmé picked up the knife, which was still on the floor, she walked over to Rain and wrapped Rain's hands around it and her hands around Rain's. The knife pressed against Esmé's heart, Esmé repeated, "Kill me, please, kill me."

Rain looked at her, vacant, she shook her head, "I can't."

"Please," Esmé sobbed, desperate, "Delilah, my sister, she's dead. Noah... he's dead too. Our camp thinks I'm a traitor. And Charles... Wolfie, _please_."

Rain shook her head, "I can't kill you," she then stepped into the tunnel, her back facing Esmé. I stared at Rain's eyes. Clara was already heading towards the exit. Rain wiped a tear. "Please," Esmé  begged again, I looked at her, Esmé's green eyes were red with tears, she was so close to coming with us.

 

Rain wiped another tear and then she grabbed the gun from her waistband and she turned to face Esmé. Rain had the barrel in her hands, Esmé grabbed the handle. Rain looked into Esmé's eyes, "You can still come with us."

Esmé shook her head, she then looked towards the bed and then back at Rain, "May you find peace."

Rain shook her head and pulled her into a cuddle and I heard her whisper in Esmé's ear, "May we find peace."

 

Rain exited the room, entering the tunnel and closing the door behind us. We begun to walk down the corridor, Clara was waiting for us at the other end, when we heard the gun shot.


	17. Rescue

**_ Monty _ **

 

Another day ends and we're no closer to finding out how to fix this mess.

 

We're all growing tired of this. Perhaps even going a little stir crazy as well. We can't leave these three rooms and we see no other humans than ourselves.

 

Raven is getting frustrated; we have barely found anything. All that we found were documents confirming what we already knew:

1) The Nuclear Plants were breaking down.

2) A radiation wave would be released known as Praimfaya to the Grounders.

3) It would make the world toxic for another five years.

4) It would happen in six months.

5) We would be dead in four.

 

Our leads were running dry and we had no idea where the documents we filed were going. Luckily for us, we were being smart. In the lab we also had two letter boxes:

1) Trash

2) Intel

But we weren't just sending off intel without making a note for ourselves. Regardless, there wasn't enough and we were losing our tether. Raven had even turned to dangerous lengths to see if she could hack the computer system to find anything else. Harper deeply frowned upon this idea.

 

"Monty, I really don't think you two should be doing this." She sadly said as she sat on the sofa under the window, fiddling with a necklace that I hadn't notice she had. It was made from black rope and the accessory was a handgun bullet case, gold.

I sat next to her, "What's that necklace?"

Harper looked at me, her brown eyes sad as her fingers let the case fall against her chest, just above her heart, she placed her hands in her lap, "It's from Jasper's gun."

I watched her eyes fill with tears, "I miss him too, everyday."

She nodded, "I know. I can't stop thinking about him. I didn't read his letter to you. I didn't know what to do. There was blood, everywhere. I opened his gun and I took a bullet out, I don't know why, I just did. I should've told you, but I didn't know how. I couldn't think. I just ran, I ran and ran. I jumped into a Rover and just kept going. I didn't even realise how far I'd gone. I drove through all the boarders until I hit the wasteland, then I got out and kept walking. Charles found me, would you believe. I was too lost to see the danger. I was hungry too." She wiped a tear away, "I'm sorry, Monty."

I put an arm over her, "Don't be. If it wasn't for Raven, I would've done the same."

 

Harper fiddled with her necklace again, "Did you read it?"

I shook my head, "No, I couldn't do it. Not yet." I paused and then promised, "When we get out of here, we'll read it together."

She looked up at me, "Only if you're sure. It's to you, not me."

I took my arm back as I turned to face her, "He loved you, Harper. He was just lost and confused. He was grieving Maya and too afraid to love again, but he did love you. He told me he did."

Her lip wobbled and her voice cracked, "I love him too." I pulled her into a proper hug, holding her body as it rattled from her sobs.

 

Of course, we didn't have much time to grieve.

 

"Fuck!" Raven yelled followed by the sound of her slamming her fist down onto the desk, "Shitting hell!"

Harper pulled away from me, wiping her tears on the back of her hand, "You should go talk to her, Monty."

I nodded, "We will be happy again, I promise." I told her, hoping she would wait to see it, instead of following in Jasper's footsteps.

 

I walked into the Lab, seeing Raven sat with her head in her hands as the computer screen turned black. I walked up to her, putting a hand on her shoulder. Her eyes met mine, "What's wrong, Raven?"

Raven looked back at the computer, "I just got through the firewall, past the first stage: Patient Files. I was about to hack into a higher up file and then, then the computer shut down. There was even a file called ALIE on there and Eligius!" She sighed, defeated, "How are we meant to solve this, Monty?"

I put my hand on hers, "We will find a way, Raven, we always do."

Raven nodded, "I know. I just don't understand why the..."

 

She trailed off as the lights shut off. The lab in complete darkness. We fell silent. Harper came running in, panicked. We all held our breath as we stood in the darkness.

 

A red glow lit up the lab, an emergency light. What was going on?

 

Raven got up out of her chair, holding my hand, Harper stood in front of us. All of us scared. All of us listening.

 

Gun shots in the corridor.

 

We froze. Raven squeezing my hand hard, fear pulsating through us. We had no way to fight back. There was nothing we could do.

 

We jumped as something heavy slammed against the door of our room.

 

Bang.

Bang!

BANG!

 

The door caved in.

 

We held our breath.

 

"Monty!" Octavia called and we released our breath in relief as the red lit up her face as she stepped inside the lab, relieved to see us, "Monty, we need to go, now."

I nodded, and then turned to our documents, "We need to take these and," I turned to the computer, pulling out a memory stick, "And this."

Octavia nodded, pulling a rucksack off of her back, "In here. Take a gun and put these clothes on."

 

* * *

 

We walked through the darkness of the trees, my hand holding onto Raven's. We had exchanged our white suits for black sweat pants, grey t-shirts and black hoodies with black combat boots, so we would blend in with the darkness around us. Harper walked in front of me and Raven, closely following Octavia, who followed Rain and Clara.

 

The night was cold. I wondered how we could possibly survive without freezing to death. Dying of cold would be a pretty shitty way to go compared to everything we've faced so far.

 

"How much further?" Octavia asked, her tone assertive.

Rain answered, "We're almost here, but we can't stop for long."

"Where will we go?" Octavia asked, growing tired.

Rain stopped in her tracks, as we caught up to her, we saw the flames through the trees. A flickering orange glow and whispers. We were finally reunited with our friends, but something told me, this wasn't the last time we'd come across the Asylum.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is fresh from 2019


	18. Killer

**_ Octavia _ **

 

Blade dragged across the back of my neck, fingers pressing into the fresh wound and something being tugged out of it. Trackers. That's what they put in our necks, they've known every move we've made so far. The sun is waking and I fear the destruction it brings with it, we will have to move quickly because it won't belong before they realise we've taken out the trackers.

 

Clarke threads a needle, stitching my skin together, stopping the blood flowing. Something tells me the blood won't stop flowing, there will be more bloodshed to come. Starting now.

 

Rain looked at us, her eyes finishing on Clara; unfinished business.

 

Bellamy unzipped one of the rucksacks, finding some tin cans, mainly soup, beans and peaches. Our fire still crackled, Bellamy poured a couple of tins of soup into a metal dish, balancing it over the fire in order to cook it. Clarke, Murphy and the rest of us watched. Behind us, I heard Rain whispering something to Clara, but I couldn't make out the words she was saying.

 

Rain told us, "Me and Clara are going to get more wood, we'll be back shortly. Make sure you eat, we have a long walk ahead of us." Her footsteps vanished into the thickness of the woods. Bellamy watched the soup boiling, we were all silent, but I could sense Monty fidgeting as he sat on the floor on the right of me, Raven by his side.

 

Monty could never contain himself, he whispered, "I think we need to talk about Rain."

Murphy looked over to him, he still laid with his back against a tree, tired from his leg wound, "What about Rain?"

He'd grown close to her, I heard them talking last night, Murphy reopening old wounds.

Monty explained, "When we were separated, me, Raven and Harper were kept in a mini-lab, we had to scan through papers and documents, trying to find information-"

"About what?" I cut him off, Monty glanced and Clarke, she shook her head slightly, barely noticeable, but not subtle enough for me not to see.

Monty brushed it off, "Just science stuff, farming and historical facts. And, patient records." There was a silence as Monty took off his backpack, pulling out a sheet of paper, "This is Rain's."

 

Murphy's forehead creased, "Maybe we shouldn't read it. Rain wouldn't want us too."

"Fuck what she wants." I said, reaching for the paper, quickly reading over it in my head. After I read it, I passed it to Clarke and Bellamy.

Monty spoke as they read it, "She killed her friend, and there's other incidents of fights and killing, almost-killing, other patients. She's deadly. Her keynote is: ' _she_ _never_ _misses_.' She's a killer, I don't think we should trust her."

Murphy groaned, "We're all killers, Monty. Perhaps, _she_ shouldn't trust us."

 

I was growing tired of this debate. I know I've been the first to show my distrust for Rain, but after tonight, I'm not sure what to think. This place is bad, worse than bad. I don't know if Rain is trustworthy, but what I do know is Clarke's right; Rain is the only one who can help us.

 

I stood up off of my log, Bellamy looked up at me, concerned, "Where are you going?"

I shrugged, "To find Rain, she's been gone awhile. Someone has to keep an eye on her, who knows where's she gone or _who_ she's gone to."

Bellamy didn't argue, instead he told me, "Be careful."

 

* * *

 

The sun rose as I pressed my body against a tree, seeing Rain knelt down, her head facing the ground and her body shaking as if she was sobbing. I scanned the area surrounding her, seeing a knife sticking out of something. Something that made the hairs on my neck stand up on end.

 

I breathed in, creeping closer to the knife. Keeping low, taking cover behind trees until it came into view: a dead body. A body of a soldier, knife in his throat, blood coating leaves around his body. His eyes open, lifeless.

 

I swallowed, the stench of him burning my nose.

 

I felt sick.

 

I'd taken lives time and time again, but I'd never stopped to actually see what it looks like.

 

The click of a gun startled me.

 

I slowly turned around, standing up with my hands in the air. Rain stood with a gun pointed at me, her cheeks wet and Clara at her feet, shot in the head. Even though all evidence pointed to Rain being the murderer, I didn't believe Rain killed her.

 

She kept the handgun aimed at my head, tears still falling, anger radiating from her. Her blue eyes lost. Her blue eyes grieving. Her blue eyes reflecting my own.

 

"I didn't kill her." Rain stated, her voice struggling to remain firm, "It was him."

I nodded, staying silent, with my hands in the air, feeling the wind picking up around us.

Rain continued, "I had her on her knees. I had my gun pointed at her head. I was _going_ to kill her, but I didn't." It took everything inside of me, to shake the image of Lincoln from my brain, focusing on the rain spitting down at us, it felt like a storm was brewing.

 

Rain continued, her hand starting to shake a little, "I blamed her, it was her, she snitched. _She_ got Esme put in that _prison_. Clara let us blame Esme for telling Charles our plans. I _hated_ Clara, I hated her so fucking much. I wanted her to die, I wanted her to pay. But, but, she just started crying. She told me _why_. She thought she could help. She didn't even beg for her life, she begged for forgiveness. I was going to put the gun down, I was, honest." Rain looked down Clara's body, "It happened so fast. She was standing and then she wasn't." She looked back at me, "I-I spun around and I threw my knife straight into his throat." She paused, a tear rolling down her cheek, "I didn't want anyone to die, you have to believe me."

I swallowed, nodding, "I believe you, I believe you. Just put the gun down."

Rain looked at her hands, shaking as she held the bow. Seconds passed, my heart pounding in my chest. She could kill me. She didn't. She lowered her gun, looking down at the floor as she did so, her lip quivering as she sobbed.

 

* * *

 

Day light streamed through the trees as we sat in front of a grave, knees to our chests both numb. I'm surprised nobody had come looking for us, perhaps they'd fell asleep or were still discussing Rain.

 

Rain stared at the grave, silent. I did too. It had been awhile since any of the dead were given a true burial, Lincoln didn't have a traditional burial. On the Ark we used to gather by the air locks and send our dead to float along the stars in a metal box, we always wondered where they ended up. I wondered if there would ever be a day when people died of old age rather than a bullet or war wound.

 

Rain sighed, "This is the first of my people to actually be buried."

I looked at her as she held the shell necklace in her hands, off of Clara she had taken a silver bangle, it appeared to be their tradition. I watched her twiddling the shell, it was very pretty, a pearl colour with some flecks of blue, "Esme wasn't your fault." I stated, the whole event had been playing on my mind. Jasper killed himself and so did Esme, "Some of us are too kind for this world."

Rain nodded, staring at the grave, "The world keeps killing until there are only killers left." She looked at me on the last bit, "I thought you hated me."

I shrugged, "The enemy of my enemy is my friend."

Rain nodded, "I can live with that." Her eyes darted to a branch with a bird tweeting on it. The bird has beautiful Scarlett feathers and a bright yellow belly as it picked at some purple berries, juice flowing from its beak. "We should go." Rain quietly stated, getting to her feet and holding a hand towards me. My hand connected with hers as I allowed her to pull me up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another fresh 2019 chapter - a lot needed new chapters due to the change of relationships and slight reorder of things


	19. Monopoly

**_ Murphy _ **

 

Our feet and necks sore, my limbs felt tired. Yet another long walk through the woods. The sun was in the middle of the sky, Noon, we'd been walking for four hours, at least. All of us silent, just following Rain. She hadn't said a word to me since Clara. The only sounds were the branches breaking under our feet and the birds tweeting in the trees. We eventually came to a clearing, Where everything was silent apart from water trickling down a small cliffs edge, hiding a cave behind it. Rain walked left around the lake, and she came to a stop. She stomped on the ground and metal clanged beneath her foot. She opened it.

 

"This is an old bunker," Rain explained, "We should rest here until we figure something out and until dark. They won't look for us at night," she then pointed to the cave behind the waterfall, "the cave is off-limits."

I nodded and I climbed down the ladder into the bunker. On the back wall was three bunks, two single, one double. The double one was in the middle and on the right side of it was a door leading to bathroom and one single bunk, on the left was a door leading to a wardrobe and another single bunk. On the left wall at the end of the bunk was a fridge, a counter, a sink, a counter and then an oven. Next to the oven was a red material sofa, that had worn away, with a wooden coffee table in front of it. Behind me and the ladder was another sofa. I walked straight towards the cupboards and rooted around, trying to find something. I heard the others coming down. Raven, Monty and Harper sat on the sofa next to the oven. Octavia sat opposite them.

 

I opened a draw, there was nothing, but a pack of cards and a jar of marbles. I reached further and I put my hand on something, I took it out and saw it was a drawing of a wolf with a rose on its ear and on the back it said:

_For the purest Rain and cutest Wolf I know._

Followed by a small sketch of a willow tree to sign it off, I folded it and put it in my pocket.

 

I grabbed the cards and looked at Harper and I chucked the cards on the table, "Why don't you play a game or something?" I suggested.

"What with?" Harper asked, as she picked up the pack and opened it.

"Marbles," I said as I handed Monty the jar.

"Thanks," Harper nodded, Monty began dealing and they began talking about some pointless shit. I opened another cupboard and said, "Hey, if you get bored, you could even play some monoply - whatever that is," I placed the game on the table and then headed towards the bunks. Rain was sat on the bottom of the double bunk.

I looked up the bunker and Clarke and Bellamy were sat together on the other sofa, Raven was laughing telling Monty he was going down.

 

I sat next to Rain, "You and Octavia were gone a while this morning, I was worried she might've killed you in all honesty-"

"No." Rain cut me off, a little spaced out, "No, she helped me with something actually."

My forehead creased as I looked over at Octavia, who was also looking over at us, trying to be subtle, "Where did Clara go?"

Rain couldn't look at me, "She left."

I pressed further, sensing her lie, "When you and Octavia were gone, we actually, we actually heard a gunshot." Rain stiffened, I pushed, "Did something happen with Clara? I noticed the blood on your sleeve too."

 

Rain grabbed my left hand and stared into my eyes, tears in hers, she firmly stated, holding back tears, "I didn't kill her, you have to believe me."

She seemed fragile in this moment, regret and guilt in her heart, I squeezed her hand gently, my eyes locked on hers, "I believe you."

 

She nodded, trying to hold back tears, but she was growing tired, I put my right arm around her, pulling her close to me, "You're safe now," I whispered into her hair.

Rain shook her head, "We'll never be safe on this Earth."

"You should sleep," I told her, she nodded and she laid down on her side, her legs bent and arm under the pillow. I remained sat on the edge of the bed, as she looked up at me, ours hands still interlocked.

 

Rain quietly whispered, "You never told me about your family."

I thought for a moment and quietly explained, trying to keep my voice stable, "My family loved me, my father died because of me," I swallowed, my voice hoarse and cracking in places, "I got sick, a really bad flu and my dad stole medicine for me. He got killed for it." A tear rolled down my cheek, Rain squeezed my hand, I continued, "My Mum became a drunken mess and the last thing she said before she died was that it was my fault he died."

"It's not your fault, I'm sorry," Rain apologised as she looked up at me.

"I got arrested for setting fire to the Officer's room that arrested my dad," I half-smiled. I then looked at Rain, "What about yours?"

"My grandfather came from the ground," Rose explained, as she looked at her hands, fiddling with them, "my mum came from space-"

"Space?" I asked and she looked up at me.

She nodded, "My Dad was a cleaner and he smuggled her food and presents in the hospital, said he knew what it was like to be an outsider."

"Wait," I said, "Space? Like from the Ark?" I was confused, nobody came to Earth before us and this was 22years ago.

Rain half-smiled, "She took part in Suicide By Earth and lived. Good thing too, she was only eighteen. I was born when she was twenty-two. I was sent here because of my genes, nothing criminal."

 

"Are your parents still with us?" I delicately asked.

Rain let go of our hands, looking at her fingers as she fidgeted, "My parents were killed by the soldiers when the came for me."

"I'm sorry," I softly said, wanting to reach out and hug her, but decided against it.

"It's okay," she mumbled, and then she looked at me, "I supposedly have a brother or sister out there too."

"What happened to them?" I asked her.

Rain looked down at her hands, which were intertwined with each other, "She was sent away." Rain looked at me, "I'll find them, one day."

"You think they're here?" I asked.

Rain nodded, "Of course. If I am, they will be. Mum said the moon will guide me," Rain then looked up, past me to see Octavia standing behind us, Octavia looked at me, "I think you should leave her to rest."

I nodded, looking back at Rain, "I'll see you later."

Rain looked at the both of us, "You guys should rest soon too."

 

I got up off of the bed, following Octavia to the table, at the others, Raven, Monty and Harper were well into their game of monopoly, laughing and joking. Clarke was asleep on Bellamy, he was staring at the ceiling. I sat on the floor beside Octavia, glancing over at Rain as she slept, checking she was okay and noticing she fell asleep with her hoodie on, She never took it off, I wonder what else she's hiding. She's been through a lot. We all have. It's crazy to think that we're barely eighteen. Octavia is still seventeen. Bellamy is twenty-three. Apart from him, we're all just kids.

 

We're all just kids.

Sent to die.

Well, we're still alive.

So go float yourself, world.


	20. Waterfalls

**_ Octavia _ **

 

The world around me was calm. Stars shining above me, trees swaying in the wind around me. Clothes fell to the floor as the water in the pond glowed blue. A toe dipped into it, followed by the rest of my body following it. Surprisingly, it was warm. Possibly a hot spring as I noted the steam rising off of it. I swam through the water towards the waterfall, feeling it massage my skin with pressure, hoping it would wash away the pain of yesterday. I didn't even know Clara or Esmé, but they're dead and I can feel their deaths on my shoulders. Most importantly, I feel it on Rain's.

 

I turned around under the waterfall, facing the cavern. I pushed myself up into the cave, looking for some shelter to dry off. Through the darkness, in the centre of the cave was a pile of animal-skin-blankets and, lucky for me, a towel. I took the black towel in my hands, lifting it up and as I did so, I caught sight of a glinting object. I wrapped the rough towel around me and bent down to see the shining metal, it was a necklace with two charms: a metal wolf and a metal tree.

 

That wasn't the only thing under the blankets, my fingers felt paper. And lucky for me, I spied a lantern too. I lit the lantern and held it as I read the letter:

 

_Dear Wolfie,_

_If you're reading this, something went wrong. I've either been captured and turned into a lab rat or I've died in the process of escaping. I hope it's the latter and if it's the former, come kill me. You were the first person I ever loved, you showed me there is more to life than pain and anger. Love exists. Your love, in particular._

 

_I was right about you; you are a mighty wolf, you are strong and powerful and beautiful, and most importantly, a leader. Don't ever forget that, because that will keep you alive. And just because I am gone, doesn't mean you can stop being a wolf, because they need you. Alek needs you._

 

_The Moon will guide you, Wolfie. Don't ever stop fighting._

 

_I'll always love you,_

_But you have to let me go now._

 

_May you find peace,_

_WR._

 

I put the note down. This cave clearly belonged to Rain aka 'Wolfie' and I questioned whether the initials belonged to Willow. Rain never told us about her past here, she didn't even tell Murphy. Monty told us Rain murdered Willow, but I don't think that's true. I think Rain was _in_ _love_ with Willow. Of course, Rain would never tell us, she didn't tell us anything.

 

I reread the letter, realising I had no idea what she meant by 'Lab rat' but it clearly wasn't good. Esme mentioned 'experiments' - something was clearly up with this place and I needed to find out what, I figured searching the mini cave would be a good place to start.

 

I shone my lantern on left wall, where I saw a pictures and a Polaroid camera, it must've been in the Asylum and they stole it. I walked over to the pictures:

 

1) The first, was a picture of Rain in the water with a the tree charm around her neck as well as the silver locket, she was smiling. Something none of us have done for awhile. Her clothes in the background, her arms covering her chest, she was laughing.

 

2) The second, was of a girl with wavy bronze hair, freckles on her cheeks and green eyes, hanging upside down in a tree.

 

3) A final photo of them in the bunker, Rain sat behind the girl, i assumed it was Willow, on the sofa. Willow gripped the camera and Rain held the peace sign up, both of them smiling.

 

My foot stood on something and I looked down to see a photo ripped in half; Willow and Rain kissing in front of the lake. I felt like I was intruding in their space. I turned around to leave and I saw Rain looking at me.

 

I felt guilty. But I wouldn't show it, before she could say anything, I sternly asked, "What are the experiments?"

Rain stared at me, deliberating whether to argue or not, before walking towards me, saying, "Let me show you something,"

 

We both stood in the centre of the cave, the blankets on my right and the waterfall on my left, the pictures behind me and the bunker somewhere in front of me.

 

Rain off her hoodie, and grabbed my lantern, she shone it on her left forearm. I looked at it, there was a human bite mark on her arm, it was bright red and surrounding it was green flesh, that looked like it was rotting away, it had lumps and bumps on it. More red dots and small green patches, lead up her arm from her wrist to presumably her shoulder. "It's disgusting, I know," Rain shook her head and put her jacket on.

 

I remained silent, waiting for her to explain. Of course, she did, "The reason why we can live on Earth without dying of rads," Rain began to explain, "is because we were injected with radiation, from being babies. Every three months until you're three, then every six months until you're eight and then once a year up until you're eighteen, then supposedly every five years until you reach sixty, " she looked at me, "Not everyone has the treatment, there's risks like cell mutation and infection and dying. A lot of babies die from it. Back in England, a year before I was born, they already knew England was survivable, already sent some eighteen year olds up to investigate and they've been surviving, my father found that out," Rain informed me, "then they sent us, some criminals, some not, and we survived," Rain looked at me, "the only thing is: our people don't know we survived. The radio blew with the plane. Kinda shitty design to be honest. It's why we need to get to The Mountain. But your people say it's destroyed?"

"Wait, you're from _England_?" I pressed, struggling to take it all in.

Rain nodded, a little smugness in her tone, "You couldn't seriously believe that America was the only place left on Earth, right?"

 

I didn't answer her, it never occurred to any of us that other countries may have survived the apocalypse too.

Rain broke the silence, "Let me show you something," she said and she walked towards the back of the cave, back towards the pictures. She shone the lantern on an image of missed: It was a photo of a person, they're eyes vacant, covered in blisters and their skin slightly greenish, they were chained to a bed. The person was a girl, her hair falling out, her lips blood red, her eyes white and kind of illuminating. "What happened to her?" I asked.

 

Rain bitterly laughed, "We call them Zombies."

"Like from the movies?" I asked.

"Kind of," Rain said and then she looked at me, "too much radiation causes you to get this disease. I don't know the name, we just say it's Zombie-itus. I think it's called Radical Infectious Zombolocal Disease phase one is like a typical cold, you get a Sore Throat, Runny Nose, Fever," she looked at me, "hardly recognisable, and week two starts Headaches, Vomiting, cold shivers - still like an ordinary cold or virus," she looked back at the wall, she sighed, "Week three just makes you really tired, Exhaustion, blood shot eyes, which isn't uncommon living in caves, lack of vitamin D from the sun and working long hours. But Week four, the disease shows itself, it's horrible, Black outs, vomiting blood, blood red eyes, chapped lips, pale skin. Horrible." Rose shook her head, she then lifted up her arm and pointed to her scar, "And if you get bitten by a person infected or come into contact with their blood or body fluids, you get it too. Horrible," she lowered her sleeve and continued, "the final curable stage, but only rich or royal get cured, your skin goes green and flakey, you get spots. You're still vomiting blood and passing out, some die at stage four, most do. You also get nightmares and your speech slurs, also get a bit violent and lash out," she then looked me dead in the eye, "if you haven't been killed, at week six, you get blisters, burning fever, like you're on fire. There's also seizures and you lose the ability to talk. And finally, your lips are blood red, like the eyes," Rain then looked back at the photo, "after that, you find peace."

 

"Peace?" I asked her.

"Death," Rain sadly said, her eyes meeting mine, "it's what we say: May We or You Find Peace," Rain then looked back at the wall, "This place was purposely creating people like this and trying to fix it. Using their own people, grounders, us. They have no limits, and if people had mutations, like born with them, grounders say they're a stain or something, Charles would take them on, trying to cure it. But mostly, killing them." Rain said as her voice cracked and I saw a tear roll down her face. "The experiments were brutal, so painful," her voice broke.

 

She quickly wiped her eyes, "I'm sorry for crying, it's just-"

"Don't be sorry," I gently said the words escaping my tongue before I could catch them. I felt sorry for her. I even cared for her. "You were one of them?"

"Yes," she croaked, "He kept me locked up for a day or two, and that's when Willow came to save me. We were going to escape, going to go to the most beautiful place we knew."

I looked at her, taking a step towards her, "How come you didn't get infected?"

She swallowed and then answered, "Because I'm immune. It's because of my genes. My grandfather was from above - grounders, you'd call them. And my mum, she came from the sky."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The disease name is sooo funny XD I had no idea what to call it
> 
> Happy Valentine’s Day! This chapter isn’t really romantic or anything, so oopsies


	21. Sofa

**_ Bellamy _ **

 

The bunker was silent for once.

 

Peace at last.

 

Monty and Raven snuggled together on the top double bunk, Harper slept on the top bunk, which wasn't above Rain. Murphy snuggled down on the sofa near the coffee table and Octavia climbed her way to the ground. Clarke rested her head on my chest, laid on her side, hands on my chest, snoring quietly. The stars crept through the glass in the hatch above us and for a moment the world felt quiet. Like in this mini bunker, nothing mattered.

 

The future seemed in my grasp. A future with Clarke, asleep on my chest in our home, together. Peace at last. No more wars, no more fighting, just peace. There has been too much bloodshed, too many lives lost and now, with Clarke by my side, I can think of a possible world without it. Freedom, liberation at my fingertips.

 

If only, the world wasn't coming to an end. If only the death wave wasn't coming. We'll find a way, we always do. But for now, none of that matters. For now, I can live in the silver lining.

 

I looked down at Clarke's face, her hair was covering it, messy, knotted and tangled. My fingertip lightly tucked it behind her ear, the moon highlighting her cheeks, radiating off of her face skin. Clarke was relaxed, her brow not furrowed, her forehead but ceased, her eyes dry and no longer frowning. I wish she smiled more often, I wish there was more for her to smile about. I'll try to make her smile again, I'll try to make her happy again.

 

Clarke deserves to be happy.

 

* * *

 

The sun wakes us, Clarke stirs on my chest and her blue eyes open to look at mine. She looks around the room, we both do. Murphy is sat on the sofa, tying his boots. Raven and Monty are still sleeping and Harper is laid staring up at the ceiling. Rain and Octavia are gone, nowhere to be seen.

 

Murphy stood up, yawning and stretching. He made his way over to the ladder, smiling slightly at me and Clarke as he grabbed the ladder and pushed his way out into the open.

 

"I could stay here forever." Clarke mumbled.

I looked back at her, "Oh yeah?" I replied, my voice hoarse from sleep and come to think of it, dry too. Thirst and hunger creeping in. I hoped Rain had brought us something substantial in the rucksacks she'd returned with.

Clarke nodded, "Yeah, it's peaceful in here. Safe. Like we're half the world away."

I intertwined my fingers with hers, "I know, Clarke. But we'll get out of this, together."

Clarke nodded but her forehead remained creased, something still on her mind.

"What's wrong, Clarke?" I asked her.

She looked at our hands, "I know we'll get out of here. That's not what I'm worried about." Her eyes looked up at mine, "What are we going to do about the end of the world, Bellamy? How do we stop that?"

 

I didn't know how to help her. That was the burning question: how do we stop the end of the fucking world?

 

We have no choice but to take things one step at a time. The foremost issue is getting out of this place and there is only one person who can help us: Rain.

 

* * *

 

"So how do we do that?" I asked Rain.

"Do what?" Murphy interrupted, coming in between myself and Clarke. I pointed to the map Rain had drawn in the mud with a stick, which she held in her hands.

 

"Are the others up yet?" I asked him.

Murphy shook his head, Monty, Raven and Harper must've still been sleeping, even though it must be about noon. Murphy had just come back from who knows where and Octavia sat on a log watching us, behind Rain. Murphy asked, "So you gonna tell me about your plan or what?"

Clarke nodded and then begun to explain, "We can get out, but it's going to be pretty hard-"

"Doesn't take a genius to work that out, Princess," Murphy sarcastically said.

She ignored him, "There's no passageway leading directly out, so we need uniforms-"

"Uniforms?" Murphy repeated, "Like guard uniforms? But they have different uniforms. Here they wear black, at the other place they wear white."

Clarke nodded, "I know. Some even wear grey, uniforms change based on location. Black here for the Asylum, White for the prisons and Farm station, Grey for village use," Clarke looked at me, "but we need all of them to get through undetected."

"Not necessarily," Rain jumped in, "once a week, they do change over. So guards from different areas in different uniform will be transferring. But it's mainly White uniform coming here with prisoners - you guys."

I suggested, "So we sneak out then."

Rain shook her head, "Guards are also heavily checked, ID badges, blood samples, finger prints - they'll know you're not one of them."

"So what do we do?" I asked, slightly frustrated. All she was doing was shooting us down, we needed to get out of here and then we could focus on the bigger picture. We didn't have time for this; time is running out.

 

Octavia looked at Rain, "So, we get a truck, Rain drives, she's logged on the system, they know she's one of them."

Rain sighed, "It still is high risk, I'm not logged as one of the guard and they might know that I've ran off, they also check any cargo in the trucks."

"How did your people get out?" Murphy asked.

Rain looked at the map, pointing to the Eastern section of The Asylum, "We used an underground road, leading from The Asylum directly out of the force-field and into the Plains. It was accessible by the eastern side of the underground prison," she lifted her finger of the map, still looking at it, "It took weeks of planning and hacking. We also had months preparation. Some of us even worked on the guard. It'd be more heavily guarded now, that's if they didn't destroy it," Rain then looked up at me and shook her head, "it's out of the question."

"So what do we do, Rain?" Octavia half-snapped.

She shook her head, "There's one way," she looked up at us, "The sewers."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a mix of old and new. I’ve also caught up with myself, meaning editing is a little more trickier so it may be every alternate day rather than every day


	22. Plans

**_ Clarke _ **

 

"The Sewers?" Harper repeated. We were all sat around the fire, Bellamy went to get the others and we were going through the plan. Raven and Monty were sat on a log, their backs towards the lake, Monty's arm over Raven. Harper was sat on another log by herself, next to Monty and Octavia sat on the floor next to Harper, her back resting against a tree. Me and Bellamy were stood, facing the lake explaining the plan. Murphy had disappeared into the woods and Rain sat on my left, Bellamy on my right.

 

"Yes," I confirmed, nodding my head. We found some paper in the bunker and Rain had produced a map for us as well as highlighting the route of the sewers, I pointed to the route, "The entrance to the sewers is southwest, to the right of the asylum in the woods. We'd have to be careful, but that's how we get in."

"And then what?" Raven asked, "what happens next?"

Bellamy cleared his throat, "We will need uniforms, we'll come out in the prison section of farm station and Rain will take us to the uniform room. Then we need to get to the main hall. We'll steal a truck and we can drive through the village-"

"The system," Rain interrupted and Bellamy and I turned to look at her. She put her hands up in surrender.

 

"The system," Bellamy nodded, then he continued, "Rain will drive us through it, we'll have to hide in the back with guns and whatever else. We'll make it to a bridge, a checkpoint. This is where action will take place-"

"We're gonna kill more people?" Monty numbly said.

I looked at the ground, "Yes," I nodded, and then I looked at Raven, "We need you to create us fake profiles, add us into the guard. That's the only way we can avoid detection and killing people."

Raven looked at me, "How do I do that?"

Rain stood up and stood next to me, "Before we go, I'll sneak you into Blue block, we can make a portable device that will allow you to break into our system, but we only have five minutes before the hack will be removed."

"Okay," Raven nodded, "so the final checkpoint is where things get nasty?"

I nodded, "There's three check points, the virus in the software should last long enough for the first two."

Raven nodded, "Then once we reach the final checkpoint?"

 

I concluded, "We get in the truck and we keep driving until we reach the end of their territory, they don't mess with grounders, they're afraid of them."

"As easy as that?" Raven looked at me, her eyebrow raised.

"Should be," I sighed.

"So when do we leave?" Harper asked.

Bellamy answered, "In three days, we camp here tonight and then make our way to the Asylum," Bellamy nodded, "we leave tomorrow night as soon as it reaches dark. That way we'll less likely to be detected."

"Sounds like a plan," Monty nodded, "so what do we do now?"

I looked Rain and she unzipped her hoodie and pulled out a bottle of wine, "We celebrate," Rain nodded.

"Wait," Bellamy interrupted, "What about your friends?"

"Yeah," Raven agreed, "What about that blonde chick?"

"And Hagan?" Bellamy suggested.

 

Rain shook her head, "Hagan will be on the guard, he might help. He might come with us." Rain stopped, silent and began opening the bottle of whiskey. We were watching her, waiting for her to tell us about Clara. "And Clara?" I softly said.

Rain sighed, "The less she knows the better," then she firmly said, "she's not coming."

I nodded. And Harper cheered, "Alright then! Let's get drunk!"

 

* * *

 

"I'll be a minute," I told them and I started to walk back towards the bunker, the sun had set and night fall had come. The best way to celebrate was deemed through drinks and food, food which Rain, Octavia and Murphy had hunted for us during the afternoon - deer and cow. My hand pulled the metal handle on the hatch open, I climbed my way into the darkness of the bunker, lighting a lantern on the kitchen counter. I pulled open a draw, grabbing a fresh piece of paper, laying the map on the left of me as I begun to copy it down on the other.

  

"You don't have to do that now," a husky voice said, scaring me.

I jumped, "You scared me," I said as I looked at Bellamy, he was leaning against the wall behind me, candlelight lighting up his face.

"Sorry," he mumbled, and then I heard him walk towards me, he stood behind me, his body heat travelling up my spine as he stood over my shoulder, "you don't have to do that now," he repeated.

"I know," I said, focusing on the piece of paper, "but it's important that more than one of us has a map."

"Yeah," Bellamy agreed, "We need to be prepared. Can I do anything to help you?"

I shook my head, "No. You should go join the others, have fun."

Bellamy moved round to the right of me, resting a hand on the counter at the side of my sketch, "What's wrong?" Bellamy asked me. I ignored him, Bellamy put his hand under my chin and made me look at him, "What's wrong?" He repeated.

I shook my head and looked back at my map, "Nothing," I sighed. I then chucked the pencil at the counter, I looked at him, his brown eyes kind and gentle, "it's just - it's just, how can we trust her? I feel like there's something wrong. Something she's not telling us about this place."

Bellamy nodded, "I feel it too. Something happened when she met Esme, and something happened with Clara. We haven't seen her since she left."

I nodded, "And it's not just that. What are the _experiments_? There's something wrong here. Rain isn't telling us something, and we need to find out what."

 

We were silent for a few seconds, thinking. Something is wrong, there is something she isn't telling us. But what is it? And how would we find out? And what is going on with Clara?

 

"Murphy," Bellamy broke the silence. I looked at him, my forehead creased, waiting for his explanation, Bellamy continued, "Murphy is close to her, he might know something."

I shook my head, "He won't tell us."

Bellamy stated, "He will if Emori is involved."

"We have no idea-"

"No we don't know where she is, but I bet Rain does," Bellamy stated. And then he bent down and opened the rucksack filled with alcohol, "Let's join them."

"How is this going to help?" I shook my head.

"Alcohol makes you talk. And I'll deal with Murphy," Bellamy said, "he trusts me more than you."

I nodded and I followed Bellamy out the bunker, the alcohol bag on his back.

 

 

* * *

 

 

"Yeah and then we - ah! The wanderers return!" Murphy cheered as me and Bellamy came into view. They were all sat around the fire, passing a bottle of whiskey around. Murphy and Rain were sat next to each other, leaning against a tree. Murphy's legs laid out in front him, Rain sat with her legs crossed. Monty and Raven were sat opposite them on a log, their backs to us as Monty had his arm around Raven, she was leaning against him, resting her head on his shoulder. Harper was sat on Monty's right on a tree stump, she was hogging the whiskey. Octavia was sat on the floor in between Murphy and Harper, leaning with her back against a tree, facing the lake.

 

Bellamy came and sat down on the floor, squeezing in between Murphy and Octavia as he dumped a rucksack down and unzipped it, "We got booze," Bellamy announced and he passed us all a beer, I took mine off of him as I sat myself down on Rain's right.

"A hundred year old beer," Murphy casually said as he opened it using a knife, he took a sip and coughed.

"It'll have that affect," Bellamy stated, "don't get too wasted."

"I won't," he muttered taking another sip.

Octavia coughed, "Not as good as Monty's Moonshine," Octavia spluttered.

"Nothing's ever as good as that," Harper laughed and him and Monty high-fived.

"What's that?" Rain asked, smiling.

I explained, "It's just an alcoholic drink Monty makes."

 

"Just an alcoholic drink?" Monty exclaimed, "It's the best drink in the world, combined with unique flavours!" Monty then added, "I made it on the Ark and down here for Unity Day."

"Unity Day?" Rain repeated.

"It's some celebration," Murphy begun his tone not-bothered, "children sing some songs and act all happy and united, ignore the suffering for a little while."

I took over, my tone more enthusiastic, "It's the day the twelve stations united in space and we celebrated the first one of Earth a few months ago."

"It's a joke," Murphy bitterly said, "Lots of Unity when we were battling grounders and each other - I wasn't even there," Murphy rolled his eyes, "because _we_ weren't united. Banished for something I didn't do."

"Murphy," Bellamy said, and Murphy looked at him, but everyone else was fixated on Murphy, who seemed to be spiraling down into a pit of despair. The drink did not mix well with him, like It didn't with Jasper.

 

Murphy shook his head and took another sip and bitterly said, "It's true. You didn't want me there, and when we get out I'll be kicked out again. You hate me for something I didn't even do," he took another sip and continued, everyone watching him. I felt the most guilty for what happened. I tried to stop it, the memory of him swinging in the air, the crowds chanting for his death. I had to battle to cut him down, "it doesn't matter that I helped Raven when she was dying, it doesn't matter that I helped saved that girl's life when Finn wanted to leave her to die, it doesn't matter that I tried to stop Finn," he looked at me, "What did you say? I should've tried harder?"

  

I looked at the floor. I knew that he felt betrayed by us all. I also knew he felt swarmed with guilt over the Raven situation too, he tried to make it up to us but none of us could show him mercy. When he found me in Polis, Lexa dying before me, he put all of his grievances aside to help me.

  

"Yeah, and despite me trying to save Raven's life, she still wanted to hand me over to the grounders for a crime I didn't commit," he shook his head, continuing, "And even though I helped you in Polis with Lexa and with Ontari, you still hate me," he spat on the floor, getting to his feet.

I tried to reach out to him, "Murphy, that's not true. You are one of us-"

"Save it, Clarke." Murphy bitterly said, "I know what I did was terrible. Raven has every right to hate me. But therest of you? All I ever do is try and make it up to you and you still treat me like shit." he then sarcastically laughed "what a fun night, right?" he then stumbled past the fire, mumbling, "I'm going to bed."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You may be pleased to know that I have officially finished editing this story meaning daily uploads will continue! Whoop! Whoop!


	23. Honesty

**_ Murphy _ **

 

"Murphy," Emori whispered in my ear. We were in the cave, laid on the floor, spooning as daylight came through. Her whisper woke me up. She rolled over, onto her back, her brown eyes looking at me. I held her good hand, her bad one was covered, she never unwrapped, no matter how much I told her it was okay, it didn't bother me. And that's the truth, she's the only person that loves me, she is so beautiful, an outcast like me.

 

I gently leaned in to kiss her. My left arm was under her head, my right hand holding her hand. I looked at her face, it was so beautiful, the tattoo that was there. Her hair wasn't in the hat she usually wore. Her hair was free, I played with a loose strand with my left hand. "You're so beautiful," I quietly whispered, "I love you."

Emori smiled, "You're soft," she then bit her lip and put her good hand on my head and pulled me close, I kissed her lips, more than once, slowly and gently. I moved my lips to her neck and kissed her, I then hovered next to her ear and whispered, "I'm quite the opposite, actually." She giggled and looked at her brown eyes, so warm and inviting, sparkling with happiness. I then smiled and said, "It's true."

She shook her head smiling, "What did I do to deserve you?"

"Well, you're stuck with me," I shrugged, playfully, not taking my eyes off hers.

"I'm glad," she softly said, and she pulled me close again, our lips meeting.

"I wish we could stay here forever," I sadly said, not looking at her eyes, but looking at my hand on her stomach.

"Me too," Emori sighed and then she started to move, she got her knees and gave me a kiss on the lips before standing up. "We got things to do, like finding my brother," Emori clearly said as she started to put her jeans on, her back facing me.

"Yeah, we do," I casually said as I looked at her back, noting the way her spine stood out, mesmerised by every curve on her body. She was a goddess. Of curse the romance doesn’t last long down here, I added, "And trying to survive."

 

She looked at me over her shoulder as she put her top on and she smirked, "Just another day on the ground. Bet you wish you were still up there."

I shook my head, and sarcastically said, "Yeah, I loved it up there, with Pike punching me in the face and the Princess scowling at me. Best time of my life."

"Sounds like it," Emori smiled and she bent down and kissed me again, then she said, "Time to get up, Murphy."

I pulled her arm and made her fall onto me, "I wish it wasn't," I kissed her neck.

"C'mon," she said, propping herself up using my chest and her knees at either side of me.

"Okay," I groaned.

 

 

* * *

 

My heart sank as she left me, leaving me to wake up in this cold world alone. The darkness of the bunker cold, but no longer lonely as the others snored around me. Clarke and Bellamy on the bottom double bunk, Monty and Raven above them, Harper snuggled on her top bunk to the right. Of course, Rain and Octavia were nowhere to be seen. That didn't matter much.

 

I stood up off of the sofa, grabbing the half-empty rucksack off of the counter. Inside it had a few cans of food, a knife and a gun with some ammo. All that I needed. I put it on my back and climbed up out of the bunker into the night, the stars would guide me.

 

I scanned the clearing around me, praying Octavia and Rain were asleep so I could just slip away. It's not as if anybody here would miss me and I refuse to leave without her, without Emori. I will find her, even if it means giving myself to the people of this place. I would die to to save her. I would kill to find her. I will not leave without her. I won't.

 

Of course, nothing is ever simple. As I turned away from the bunker and waterfall, turning towards the direction we first came from, the fire in between burned and both Octavia and Rain sat around it. Octavia spotted me, waving me over. Shit.

 

Sighing and cursing on the inside, I begrudgingly walked myself to sit on the log in between them both. Octavia examined me, "What's with the bag, Murphy?"

I shrugged, keeping silent.

Octavia pressed, "Where are you going?"

I shrugged again, staring at the flames, wishing the would swallow me whole.

Octavia nodded, staring into the flames herself, "I get it. I Can't stand them either."

I shook my head, "That's a lie, Octavia. When will you stop lying to yourself? You love them, _all_ of them. Be honest for once."

Octavia looked at me, eyebrow raised, "Honesty? Now you want to be honest? Tell me where you are going."

 

I shrugged, looking back at the flames, debating whether to come clean. Feeling Rain watching me too, "I-I was going to hand myself in."

"Why on earth would you do that?" Octavia questioned my sanity.

"Because I can't leave here without Emori." I confessed, feeling my emotions tugging at me, my eyes looked at Octavia's, her own heart lurching forward, "I know she isn't dead. It's bullshit. And I'm not in denial either, because when someone dies, you feel it," I put my hand over my heart, "In here. She is alive somewhere here and I can't leave until I have found her. I won't."

 

Octavia's gaze flickered to Rain for a brief second before looking back at me, her voice became hoarse, tears stinging her eyes and choking her, "I get it, Murphy. If I, If I could have done something to save... I would have. But, Emori wouldn't want you risking your life and doing something stupid to save her. If you go back there, they'll _kill_ you. And if Emori is still here, then she'll be locked up somewhere and you will be dead."

"So what do I do instead?" I exclaimed, frustration surging through me, "Tell me, what the fuck do I do instead?"

Octavia looked lost, "I-I don't know." she then looked at the flames for a second, thinking, before finally saying, "I'll go and find her."

I looked up at her, my forehead creased, "How will you find her? And you just said yourself, they'll kill either you or me."

Octavia shrugged, her eyes clouding over with tears, "You, you have more to lose." she then looked at Rain, "Besides, Rain will help me, right?"

 

Before Rain could respond, I jumped in, "No, Octavia. I will not let you sacrifice yourself for me or Emori. Aside from the fact Bellamy would murder me if I let you, I care about you. I can't let you die for me. You don't want that either."

Octavia shrugged, letting her brick walls tumble down. Revealing the depth of her grief, showing me the darkness inside of her, "It will be a warrior's death. And I'm not afraid of dying either. As for Bellamy, he has Clarke now. She will patch him up and take care of him."

 

I couldn't believe what she was saying, did she really want this? Lincoln wouldn't want this. I couldn't let her do this, as much as I loved Emori, I would not allow Octavia to sacrifice herself this way. I shook my head, "No, Octavia. You are not doing this." I looked at Rain, "Do not allow her to do this. If she goes, you will pay for it, understand?"

Rain nodded, "None of you should go. I think you should both get some rest. We can figure this put in the morning."

I nodded, "Okay. In the morning." I agreed with her, I could wait till morning to go find her myself.


	24. Lips

**_ Octavia _ **

 

We watched Murphy walk back to the bunker, disappearing into the hatch. I felt the tears choking me, my hand desperately trying to wipe the falling tears away from my cheeks, desperately trying not to show weakness. But it was much too difficult, I had just told Murphy that I would happily greet a Warrior's Death. I was tired of living, the weight of Lincoln's death felt unbearable on my shoulders.

 

Rain watched me, her own throat hoarse as she broke the fragile silence, "Tell me, tell me about Lincoln."

 

I looked up at her, her blue eyes locked on mine, sympathetic as she said his name. Her pain reflected in mine. I nodded, I hadn't spoke of him since it happened. The City of Light distracted me and then Jasper died, another weight added onto my shoulders. Again, I blocked it out, travelling with my friends instead. I started to speak, "Lincoln, Lincoln was the most beautiful person I had never met. He didn't believe in war and killing, he wanted peace. He loved me, he loved me in a way I had never been loved before. He gave me flowers, Lilies. He tried so hard to make it work between us and the grounders. He was a grounder himself, but he hated their ways, he became an outcast. He made me feel like I belonged. He helped me become a warrior, he gave me strength. And now, now he's gone." I looked up at her, wiping my damp cheeks, "He was my _home_."

 

Rain nodded, "Is that how Murphy feels about Emori?"

 

I shrugged, "I never met Emori. None of us have. He rescued her from The City Of Light and then they disappeared again. I think he does. The way he talks about her, I think she's his home too. He's right, we can't leave her here."

 

Rain nodded again, she got up, sitting beside me. Only to fall silent again, thinking. She stared at the flames. We both did. The world around us falling silent again, the only sounds coming from the crackling of the fire and the rush of water from the waterfall. Rain fidgeted with her hands, her face going blank as she begun to say, "I-I still dream about her." she stated, I watched her carefully, "Willow, Willow was my home. She was never a peacekeeper, she was a fighter. She hated this place, but she loved her people in it. She _loved_ _me_. She made this place bearable, she gave me hope. Willow was crazy, like really fucking crazy, but in a good way. She was the first girl I've ever loved, aside from my parents, of course." Her jaw then clenched, "Charles took her away from me." Her eyes then met mine, "I won't let him take Emori, I promise."

 

My forehead creased, "Do you know where she is?"

 

Rain looked away from me, guilt-stricken, "I've always known where she is. I should have told you sooner." she then looked back up at me, "Please don't hate me."

 

I shook my head, meaning every word, "I don't hate you." I put a hand over hers, "I tried to hate you, I wanted to. But I can't hate you. Not after seeing what you've been through. You're just like us, a survivor against all the odds."

 

She nodded, her eyes captivating, a rush of feelings flooding in. She lost someone close to her like me, she puts on a cold exterior like me. All she wants is it to stop, like me. She is a cold-blooded killer but as warm as the sun. Intoxicating. Intoxicated, I couldn't tell which was drawing my lips towards hers - lust, grief, booze or a mix of all three. I shut my eyes as our lips moved with each other, hands squeezing at hips and backs. Hands wanting more. Rain stood up, grabbing my hand and pulling me with her. She lead me into the safety and quietness of her cave. Lips reattached to each other.

 

Rain pulled me down on top of the fur blankets, we sat up groin to groin, hands running up and down our bodies. Her hands slipping my leather jacket off, my hands unzipping her hoodie. She shrugged the rest of her hoodie off, my lips on her neck, hands squeezing her hips. She ran her hands up the inside of my shirt, cold from being outside, sending sparks through my body as she lifted my top off my head. I knelt in front of her, back to the waterfall as she removed her own shirt. She then pulled me down, laying me on my back as she sat on top of me, kissing down my stomach, removing my belt and pulling down my trousers as she did so. The hunger and lust taking over. I needed her. I needed this. I wanted this.

 

 

* * *

 

My eyes opened to sunlight streaming into the cave, my back cold, exposed from the blankets. All of our clothes littering the floor around us and the sound of Rain hissing "Shit!" followed by a a loud crash woke me to life. I bolted upright, shielding my bare chest with the blankets to see Rain jumping into her leggings after knocking into a tea pot that was on the centre rock along with the note and wolves.

 

"Good morning," I mumbled, my voice thick with sleep, as I wiped my eyes with my hands.

"Sorry," Rain mumbled, looking over her shoulder, her hair still free and wavy. She already was wearing her bra and now was putting on a loose grey three-quarter sleeved top, it had frayed at the bottom.

 

"Where'd you get that from?" I asked.

"It was in a box at the back of the cave," she mumbled, "Willow got it for me." Rain bent down and put her socks on, leaning on the wall for support. I watched carefully, wondering what she was doing. I reached for my own underpants and top, pulling them on underneath the blankets. Rain seemed in a hurry to get dressed. "Shit!" Rain cursed again as she dropped her belt on the floor. I got out of the blankets, walking towards her, the cave rock was smooth and cold on my feet, "Are you okay?" I asked her as I stood behind her.

"Yeah, I'm fine," she said quickly, not looking at me as she put her belt on, her hands shaking.

I grabbed them and made her look at me, her blue eyes looked worried and tearful, "What's wrong?" I asked her, concerned.

"I shouldn't have slept with you," Rain sadly said, looking down at the floor. I let go of her, and she walked over to the far corner of the cave, where a black rucksack stood, it had a small hole in the outer material. Rain started taking down the photos of her and Willow and started putting them in her bag.

"You're leaving, aren't you?" I said, slightly bitter.

 

Rain ignored me. I just stood there, "Look at me," I half-snapped.

Rain moved to the centre of the rock and bobbed down as she picked up her note and put it in the rucksack.

"Look at me, Rain," I repeated. She crouched looking at the wolf and tree, put them on the chain with her heart locket, then She stood up and turned to face the water, her hand wiping her face. "Look at me," I demanded. She didn't. I walked up to her and grabbed her shoulder and made her turn to face me. She looked at the floor, "Look at me," I softly said. Her blue eyes met mine.

"I'm sorry," her voice shook as she shrugged. A tear rolling down.

"That's why you kissed me," I said, a goodbye kiss, I looked at her and the pictures at the back of the cave and then back at her, "you're going after him."

 

Rain looked at the floor, and then into my eyes, "I have to. He killed Willow."

"It's a suicide mission," I bluntly stated.

She nodded and looked at the floor and numbly said, "I know, but, I need to save Emori."

I nodded, remembering she had confessed to knowing where she is last night, "I'll come with you, then."

Rain shook her head, "No, Octavia. You can't. I have to do this alone, besides, you'll just slow me down."

I nodded, "Okay." My heart felt torn, I barely new this girl and last night was just a one time thing. Yet, I couldn't watch her leave. I couldn't let her die. But I also couldn't make her stay, "Just be careful, yeah?"

Rain half-smiled, "May we meet again."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is basically a fresh new chapter. What’s your opinions on Rain and Octavia (Roctavia)? 
> 
> I just ship Octavia as Bisexual so hard, she is my favourite female character ever. She’s just amazing and Marie is stunning too <3


	25. Screams

**_ Murphy _ **

 

Rain spat at me as I emerged from the bunker, the sun greeting me, the downpour soaking my hands and muddying my boots. As I stepped out from the bunker, I looked to the cave, seeing it was empty. I walked to my right, towards the fire pit, that too empty. Both Octavia and Rain were missing. Strange. I was about to call out to them when I heard a voice call, "Murphy!" I turned my head to see Bellamy climbing out the bunker and walking over to me. I kept walking towards the logs, sitting down in front of the lake, the fire smoking embers in front of me. 

 

Bellamy came and sat next to me, "We need to talk."

 

"What about?" I asked, still not looking at him, "Am I in trouble?"

Bellamy shook his head, and he watched the water with me, "No. I forgive you-"

"Forgive me?" I repeated, raising my eyebrow, I looked at him and I laughed, "Forgive me for what?"

Bellamy looked at me, "Well, I hope you forgive me actually."

"I'm listening," I said, and then sarcastically, "an apology from King Bellamy, this is exciting."

Bellamy rolled his eyes and then he sincerely said, "I understand why you killed those people. And you proved yourself, back in Polis. And I shouldn't have kicked that bucket-"

"You're right, you shouldn't have," I slowly said, looking at him.

"I hope we can be friends," Bellamy said and held out his hand.

 

I looked at it, and I shook my head, looking at the lake, and then I looked back at him, "I guess I've got nothing better to do."

Bellamy nodded and put his hand down, "Thank you," he sincerely said.

I nodded.

Bellamy then wiped his hands on his trousers and cleared his throat, "So what's happening with you and Rain?"

I bitterly laughed, "Me and Rain? Doesn't exist. Perhaps you should be asking Rain and Octavia that question."

Bellamy's forehead creased, "Rain and Octavia?"

I rolled my eyes, nodding, "Well, yeah, Bellamy. Don't tell me you haven't noticed them spending all their time with each other lately."

"I guess they have been sleeping out here together. They both bonded after rescuing Monty." Bellamy agreed and then he looked towards the cave and then back at me, "Where is Rain?"

"I-"

 

"MURPHY!" I was cut off by the sound of my name being screamed. Me and Bellamy bolted up and faced the forest, the place where the scream came from, it was faint. But we both heard it. We shared a glance and both grabbed a gun. We walked into the forest. Scouting the trees. "Murphy!" The voice screamed again, louder this time. I turned around and the camp was no longer visible. Bellamy looked at me, he was on edge and so was I. We walked further. The scream getting louder and louder as we went deeper into the forest. We scanned the treetops, making sure it wasn't an ambush.

 

And then I heard her.

 

"John!" A voice weakly called.

 

I swallowed.

 

Emori.

 

Bellamy looked at me, I stared at him. I shook my head. It can't be her. "John!" She called again. And I caught a glimpse of them. She was crouched down, Rain pulling on her good arm. I ran over to her.

 

"Emori!" I exclaimed in shock as I knelt before her, my hands on her face. Her skin was burning hot and so pale. Her eyes blood shot. Emori coughed and turned her head to the side and vomited blood. I stared at her. I ripped a piece of my shirt off and wiped her mouth, "Emori, I thought you were dead," I mumbled.

"I thought you were dead," Emori said and a tear rolled down her cheek. I pulled her close, wrapping my arms around her. I felt her heart beating fast against mine, I pulled back and looked into her eyes, "I've missed you so much."

"It was horrible, John," Emori croaked, she looked at the floor and back at me, "they chained me to a bed and injected me with all kinds of stuff."

"You're safe now," I firmly said, lifting her head to look me in the eye, "you're safe."

Emori nodded and then she started to cough and wheeze again and she vomited more blood. I turned my head to look at Rain, "Help her." I half-snapped. I looked at Emori, she looked like the people in Rain's pictures. I shook my head and snapped, "Help her."

"I don't know how," Rain cried.

I looked at Bellamy, "We need to get her back to camp, help me lift her."

Bellamy nodded and he walked behind Emori, he put his hands underneath Emori's arms and lifted her. I grabbed her legs. And we walked back to camp.

 

* * *

 

As we came through the trees I heard Monty come running over, "What happened?" He asked.

"She's got the infection," I quickly said.

"Here," Clarke said, "put her on the blanket."

We walked towards the fire and lowered Emori onto a blanket. I knelt down beside her head and grabbed her hand, "Its going to be okay," I comforted her.

"I don't wanna die, John," she cried, a tear rolling down her cheek and she coughed again.

"Get her on her side!" I demanded. Clarke came and gently turned Emori. She was facing me, I blocked the lake, the fire behind her. I stared into her eyes, "You're not going to die, I promise," I told her, my own eyes going watery.

 

Clarke knelt behind Emori, and Bellamy stood behind me. Monty stood behind the fire, watching. I turned my head and saw Raven, Harper and Octavia running over.

Clarke stood up, "Raven, Harper make a stretcher with the bed sheets and logs," I saw Raven nod and they headed back to the bunker. Clarke looked at Monty, "Go get some water from the waterfall - lots of it. And Octavia?”

"Yeah?" Octavia asked.

"Go and get the medical bag, there might be something we can use," Clarke instructed and Octavia hesitated slightly, examining Rain before she ran towards the bunker.

 

Rain stood behind me. I looked at her, "What's happening to her?!"

 

Rain quickly answered, panicked, "She's infected with a disease. There's a cure-"

 

"Use it then!" I demanded, "Save her!"

"It's back at home, I don't know how to make it," Rain gushed, her voice high pitched and panicky.

"Well what about before the cure?!" I snapped.

"I don't-"

"Think!" I shouted, still holding Emori's hand. She coughed again and vomited.

"There's one thing we could try..." Rain mumbled and trailed off.

"What?!" I demanded, as I wiped Emori's face with the piece of cloth I ripped off.

"It's really dangerous-"

"I don't care!" I snapped, I then looked at Emori and kissed her hand, "it's going to be okay," I told her.

"Blood transfusion," Rain burst out, "I'm immune, we could put my blood in her but..."

"But what?" I growled, panicking. I couldn't lose Emori, I just got her back. I can't lose her. She means so much to me, she's the only one that loves me.

Rain explained, "She could die, my blood could speed up the radiation since mine is full of it. It could kill her instantly and we might get caught sneaking back into the Asylum."

"Isn't there another way?" I demanded. I put my hand on Emori's forehead, her skin was burning, like fire. She spluttered again. "Where is he with the water?" I growled.

"Here," Monty said, as if on queue, I grabbed it and opened Emori's mouth and gave her water. She gulped it down.

 

"It's okay," I told her, "it's okay. It's going to be okay."

"I love you, John," Emori mumbled and she squeezed my hand.

"I love you too," I told her and I kissed her forehead.

"Maybe there's another way," Rain mumbled.

"What?!" I demanded and she remained silent, "Tell me, Rain!"

She remained silent.

Monty stared at me and then he mumbled, "She uses your blood."

I met her gaze, she was staring at me, "My blood?" I gasped and then firmly to Rain, "Would it work?"

"Your blood is stronger than a grounders, it's possible yours would clean hers," Rain confirmed, "you'd be really weak afterwards."

"But it would work? And she wouldn't die?" I asked, my tone more calm.

"Yes," Rain said, defeated.

"Okay," I nodded, "if we leave now, we'll be ready for the sewers by nightfall," I stood up and Raven and Harper came running with the homemade stretcher, they put it down behind Emori. I lifted Emori like a baby and I carefully put her on the stretcher.

 

"I'll come with you," Bellamy stated, looking me in the eyes, I nodded.

"I'm coming too," Octavia called as she ran over and put the bag down.

Rain nodded, "Okay, Harper, you come with us," Rain ordered.

Harper nodded and stood with Octavia.

"What do we do?" Clarke asked.

"You, Raven, and Monty," Rain said, "you guys walk with us through the forest and once we reach the buildings, go to Blue Tower and make the radio. We'll meet you at the sewers."

"Okay," Clarke nodded.


	26. Walk

**_ Murphy _ **

 

I stared at her face as we walked through the woods, all of us silent. Her face was peaceful and her eyes shut as she tried to sleep, weak from the blood loss and disease. Every once in a while, she'd cough and vomit more blood, but I'd be there, soothing her, telling her it'll be okay, telling her I won't leave her and that we're almost there. I can't lose her. I can't lose Emori. I wanted to hug her and hold her hand, but my hands clenched the two logs of the fake-stretcher.

 

I looked ahead of me and saw Bellamy looking at me; he was walking backwards as he held the fake-stretcher with me. "You don't have to feel sorry for me," I broke the silence as I looked at Bellamy, he looked at the floor.

"I don't," Bellamy responded, his voice hoarse, and then his eyes looked at mine, "I'm sure she'll make it."

"I hope so," I mumbled looking down at Emori. Her mouth had dried blood coming out the corners and her skin was a greenish colour, I could feel her warmth radiating towards me. I then looked ahead, "How far?" I called out.

"Well," Rain shouted back to us, "this is the old camp." I looked slightly to the left and saw the burnt out fire pit of our first camp.

 

"We should have a water break," Harper called from behind me, her and Monty were walking behind, protecting us. Rain led with Clarke, and Octavia walked on the left us, Raven on the right.

"We haven't got time," I argued, as everyone came to a stop, including Bellamy, preventing me from walking.

"We won't make it if we die of dehydration," Raven sternly said, looking at me.

Clarke came walking over to us, "They're right, Murphy, we need a drink at least," she then went in her rucksack and pulled a bottle of water out, she handed it out for me.

I shook my head, "Princess, we can't stop. I don't want your water."

She pushed the bottle closer to me, "Drink." She then looked at Emori and at me, "She needs you to be strong. You need to be hydrated if you want both of you to live. A five minute break won't hurt."

 

I stared at the bottle and then looked at the Princess and at Bellamy, he nodded. I sighed, "No longer then five."

"I promise," Princess said, and then she called out, "Alright, water break."

 

* * *

 

Me and Bellamy lowered Emori on the floor, I sat next to her as I took a sip of water from the Princess. Bellamy came and sat next to me, Octavia, Monty and Harper sat around the old fire. Rain, Raven and Princess stood the furthest away, going over the plans again. Each of us with a bottle of water taking sips. I stared at Emori and she opened her eyes and coughed and spluttered again.

"Hey, hey," I soothed, "I got you," as I rolled her over and as she spat blood all over the floor.

"Thank you," Emori choked.

"We're a team," I told her, my voice soft and sad. She laid back on her back and I wiped her mouth with the bottom of my shirt before placing the water to her mouth, she gulped it down.

"We are a good team," Emori smiled after swallowing the water, she then closed her eyes.

"Yeah, we are," I mumbled, as I held her hand.

 

"She will make it," Bellamy croaked from behind my shoulder.

I half-snapped, "I know she will," still staring at Emori.

"We're a team too, Murphy," Bellamy told me, sincerity in his tone, I still stared at Emori, remaining silent, he then continued, "When we get out of here, there's a place for both of you with us. What happened back at the dropship doesn't matter. We’re a team now."

I looked at him and coldly said, "And what happens when one of your friends wants me gone? Raven was prepared to give me up instead of Finn, after I saved her life."

"Don't worry about that," Bellamy shook his head, "you are one of us, Murphy."

I stared at him, his facial expression serious, I then replied, sincere, "You best tell them that."

Clarke then shouted, "Break time over, we need to move." And we got to our positions.

 

* * *

 

We kept trudging through the forest, Emori now asleep in her stretcher. Clarke and Octavia had switched positions and I could hear Octavia and Rain whispering. Octavia started the conversation, "Did you make it in alright? Any problems?"

Rain shook her head, "No problems. Had to kill a couple guards, but getting her was fine. She was where I predicted she would be."

Octavia nodded, pausing before softly asking, "Was it traumatic? Any flashbacks?"

Rain stiffened slightly, "It, it was fine. Seeing her like this brings back memories, but I'm used to it. Over it. It was helpful anyway, I just followed the tunnels Willow took."

 

Was I hearing this right? Did Rain know where Emori was all this time? She tried to convince me that Emori was dead and yet she knew where she was all this time? Rage burned inside of me.

 

I looked at Monty, "Could you take over a second?"

Monty looked at me, slightly confused, but he agreed anyway, "Sure." he said, taking over my part of the stretcher.

 

I made my way to the front, Octavia and Rain silent as I stepped in between them, my tone was cold, "What are you two whispering about?"

Octavia shrugged, "Nothing, Murphy. We're almost here."

"Doesn't sound like nothing." I challenged, I turned my attention to Rain, "Y'know I've been thinking, it's pretty funny how you showed up this morning with Emori. It doesn't look like she escaped herself and you found her in the woods. So tell me, how did you know where she was?"

Rain stiffened, cold herself, "Friends."

"Bullshit." I retorted, keeping my voice still quiet to not disturb Emori, yet still fueled with anger, "But whilst where on the topic of friends, why don't you confess to what really happened with Clara, huh?"

Octavia defended Rain, "Leave it, Murphy. Now's not the time. We can sort this once we get out of here."

 

I shook my head, "No. We will sort this now." I stopped suddenly, making Rain stop with me as I grabbed her. All of us stood still and I could feel the eyes of my people watching.

Octavia jumped in, "Murphy, we need to keep going."

I shook my head, "Not until she admits that she knew where Emori was all this time and she's been lying to us."

 

Nobody spoke.

 

"I'm waiting." I pushed, then snapping, "I stuck up for you, Rain. I tried to care for you and convince the others that we could trust you. Yet you have been lying all this time. From the day we arrived you knew where she was, you knew what they were doing to her and yet you told me she was dead. You acted like you knew nothing. You're a liar and a traitor."

Rain remained silent, looking at the floor, "I should have told you sooner. I am sorry for that. I don't expect forgiveness, hate me all you want. But I am helping you now. I am going to put things right."

 

Her answer pissed me off even more, I don't know what I wanted from her. I didn't care right now, all I wanted was Emori safe and well. "Whatever." I tutted, I looked back at the others, "We best keep moving."


	27. Bricks

**_ Harper _ **

 

We finally made it into the tunnel, Clarke, Raven, and Monty had already headed to the tower as we headed down a dark tunnel, known as a secret passage. Rain came to a stop at the end of the corridor and pressed a brick in, which revealed a door to a white room, she didn't hesitate as we entered the white room. Bellamy and Murphy waited in the tunnel outside the room. The room was a mess, blood on the floor and a dead body of a ginger-haired girl in the corner, her grey eyes open with her pupils dilated and clutching a stem with several long, thin leaves attache to it  in her right hand, a bullet hole in her skull.

 

"What happened to her?" I whispered to Octavia as we stood behind the black sofa, watching Rain crouch down next to the dead body and close her eyes as she grabbed the leaves.

"Son of a bitch," Rain whispered as she looked towards the bed and clutched the leaves. The bed had wolf-skin bedding on it and more leaves on top of the quilt.

"What's wrong?" I asked her.

Rain looked at me, "Charles knows we are here."

"It's a leaf from a willow tree?" Octavia sadly said, Rain nodded, Octavia continued, "So what do we do now?"

Rain looked at her, "Well, he doesn't know that we are here now, but he's expecting us-"

"So what does that mean?" Murphy interrupted.

Rain explained, panic rising, "It means that the guard will be heavy, meaning we will have to break in on the other side of the tunnel, it should be dead with the threat of rebels. But it means that we still have to be careful of guards and no chance of getting uniform for all of us or getting Hagan."

"Okay," Octavia nodded, "So how do we get through there?" Octavia pointed behind us, towards Bellamy and Murphy, who stood listening to us.

"I don't know," Rain shrugged.

 

Bellamy then cleared his throat and we looked at him, he suggested, "We could get the sofa and smash it into the wall until we find a weak spot."

"Okay," Octavia nodded and then she looked at me as she ran to pick up one end of the sofa, "help me, Harper"

"Of course," I replied as I lifted the other end. Bellamy and Murphy moved out the way as we charged at the brick wall. We crashed into the wall and nothing happened. We charged again and again and again. Still nothing. Murphy groaned in frustration.

"Move out the way," Rain said and we moved as she stood next to the wall and shone her torch on it. There was no cracks and all the bricks looked the same. She scanned every brick, touching each one but nothing happened. All that existed was moss and cobwebs and the sound of dripping.

 

"Hey," I spoke, "do you hear the dripping sound? Where's the water coming from? I could do with a drink."

Rain then stood up and kissed me on the cheek, "You're a genius!"

"I am?" I asked surprised as she walked to the left corner of the wall where water was coming out.

"Yes, of course!" Rain gasped as she ran her fingers in the water and knocked against it until she heard a hollow sound. She flipped her knife around, and scratched the cement of the hollow brick, making it turn to sludge. She stood up and kicked the brick several times.

"It's not working!" Murphy sighed.

Rain ignored him and continued kicking the brick until eventually it moved inwards. "Help me," she called out to us and I knelt down beside her, my knees getting wet in the water. I slammed the end of my gun into the stone, making it move until it fell through. We both stared into the room and could see various equipment, Rain swallowed hard and then she started pulling at the bricks above us and underneath, trying to make them cave in. Both me and Octavia joined in, until there was a hole big enough to crawl through.

 

I was the last to enter the room, Bellamy and Murphy were laying Emori down on a table in the centre of the room, it looked like the blood transfusion device in the mountain, but it wasn't the only thing in the room. To my left was a vertices table with chains and restraints, probably to chain experiments to. There was also a table on the left of the vertical one, and it had various needles and scalpels and bottles on it as well as rubber gloves and disinfectants. I looked towards Rain, who was hooking Emori and Murphy to the machine, inserting needles. Bellamy stood against the metal door opposite the hole in the wall, his gun ready.

 

Octavia stood next to me. "Pretty creepy," Octavia mumbled.

I looked at her, "It's worse than the mountain, all dark and metallic."

"Like something from a horror movie," Octavia muttered.

I stared at Murphy and Emori and watched them close their eyes, Rain had used an anaesthetic that would wear off in about half an hour, she told us.

 

Rain stood in the middle of the room, she looked at Bellamy, "Guard that door, nobody should be coming through, but they might know we are here. Shoot first ask later," Rain then turned to me, "You guard the hole and make sure you leave in forty minutes, even if I'm not here-"

"Where are you going?" Octavia interrupted, slightly concerned.

Rain looked at the hole, "I've got something to take care of," Rain then looked at Octavia, "You guard with Harper and make sure you give them," she looked at Murphy and Emori, "water as soon as they wake up." She then put her hand on Emori's forehead, "she feels cooler. It's working," she sighed with relief. 

 

Rain walked towards the hole, breathing in and out, preparing herself for whatever mission she was about to set herself on. But before she could go, Octavia grabbed her arm, me and Bellamy watching closely at the unnoticed feelings that had formed between them. Octavia swallowed, "Before you go, just know that vengeance isn't everything. I killed Pike, the man responsible for murdering Lincoln. It felt good at the time and I don't regret it, but it hasn't made the grief any less painful." She then paused, looking at the floor, "I guess, what I'm trying to say is, be careful. Don't take unnecessary risks. If you die over getting revenge, then it means Willow died for nothing. Just, come back, yeah?"

 

Rain smiled at Octavia, leaning in to kiss her on the cheek, "I'll see you again, Octavia." She then lightened the tone, "Didn't you read my notes? I never miss." Rain stepped back, looking at us all, "Thank you for helping me, if it does go wrong, Clarke can get you out without me. Good luck, see you all on the otherside." And with that, Rain disappeared through the crack in the wall.


	28. Rain

**_ Rain _ **

 

I pressed my body against Esme's door and looked through the small window in it, watching the guards walk up and down, there was only two of them. The furthest one away sat down on a stool and pulled out a breakfast bar as he bit into it and stared into space. The other one came walking the corridor, I pressed the door handle, it was locked, obviously.

 

I looked around the room, Charles was expecting me, he changed the bedding to represent me, he knew I'd be back. I walked up to the bed and pulled back the covers, making the leaves fall on the floor. Nothing. I lifted the pillows, and still nothing. I looked to the corner of the room and saw a camera. I walked to the counter and grabbed a vase, which had more leaves inside. I emptied it and pushed the right bedside table under the camera. I smashed the camera with the vase. Now he couldn't watch. An alarm sounded and I ran back to the door, pressing against it.

 

I saw the guard come running. He scanned the door with his key card and pushed it open. I grabbed my bow from behind my back and ran behind him. I pulled my bow against his throat, strangling him. He gasped for air and tried to push me off, but it was too late. I heard the other call out for him. I stood in the corridor and held my bow towards him, arrow aimed at his head. The guard stared at me. He was unarmed.

"Hey, listen-"

"Shut it." I cut him off, he stood with his hands up in surrender, "turn off the alarm," I demanded.

He reached for his radio.

"Tell them to shut it off," I sternly said.

His grey eyes were fearful, he recognised my face and I vaguely recognised his. He reminded me of my trainer and then kidnapper.

"Rain, I know you won't hurt me," he said, trying to be calm, but his voice shook.

"You don't know me," I firmly stated as I aimed an arrow at his leg and fired. He grunted in pain and fell to the floor, clutching it, his face growing pale. I ran up to him, he knelt at my feet, my arrow pressed against his head, "Turn it off."

"You bitch," he grunted. I pulled my string back. He lifted the radio to his mouth and muttered into it, "Turn the alarm off, we have the situation under control, over."

I stared at him and the alarms turned off. I looked at him, "Chuck the radio behind me."

"Why?"

"Do it!" I demanded, pulling the string back further and he did it. I then turned my head away, "I'm sorry," I mumbled as I released the arrow and heard it crack through his skull and heard his body fall to the floor. "May you find peace," I mumbled. I then turned and picked up his radio before heading back to Esme's room and grabbing the other guards radio. I walked to the hole and I heard voices I chucked a radio through and turned back around.

 

* * *

 

I made my way past the dead guard, dressed in the other guards uniform, my hair in a pony tail, a mask covering my face. I held the key card and scanned it on the door at the end of the corridor. I walked up the stair well, going up four flights of stairs before coming to the door I seeked. I scanned the card and it unlocked. Shit. I heard voices and I hid behind a trolley. I watched two scientists emerge and stand in front of a lift at the end of the corridor. One of them was an old man, his hair missing in the middle and grey, he wore glasses and was quite small. He had wrinkles and dressed in a white lab coat, white trousers, black shoes and a blue shirt with a white tie. Talking to him was a woman wearing white high heels, a blue dress that finished just above the knee and a white lab jacket, her hair was scraped back into a long black ponytail. She had a clipboard in her hands.

 

"Listen, I think we should get out of here, dad," the woman said to the old man.

"Nonsense, Natasha, I told you, if something went wrong, Charles would tell us," the old man said.

Natasha shook her head and leaned in close, "Dad, something bad is happening. The rebels with the explosion yesterday was just the start. I know something is wrong. Not just the rebels and the newcomers escaping."

"You worry too much," the old man said.

"Please come with me," Natasha begged her father, "I don't want to lose you."

"I promise, everything is fine. But, if you want to leave, I won't stop you," the father sighed.

Natasha pulled him into a hug, "I hope you're right," she mumbled as they parted and she turned and headed into a room on the right.

 

The old man stood and shook his head, facing the windows on the left, which looked out onto the rest of the complex and forest. I looked back at him and he continued to look out at the window, his arms folded, before he sighed and walked into the room his daughter was in. I waited for a few seconds and the whole place was silent. I ran down the corridor, a gun in my waistband, card in my hand. I ran to the elevator and scanned it, but the light flashed red and it was denied. "Come on!" I groaned as I tried to scan it again and again it was denied. I scanned it again and again, but of course it didn't work. I groaned in frustration and kicked the lift doors, creating a large bang.

 

"Are you okay?" I heard a voice asked and I turned around to see the old man, standing in the doorway. Shit. I looked at the floor. "Are you okay?" He repeated as he walked towards me.

I looked up at him, his eyes met mine and he stopped dead in his tracks, centimetres away from me.

"Do I know you?" He asked, his forehead creased trying to work out who I am.

"Kind of," I muttered, my British accent shining through.

He gulped, "You're one of the rebels?"

I shook my head, looking into his eyes and then at the floor, "No. I'm not a rebel. My name's Rain, Rain Wolf." I looked at his eyes, fear shooting through them, he was frozen, "I take it you've heard of me."

He stared at me and stuttered, "Pl-pl-please don't hu-hurt m-me. I'll, I'll do anything. I-I have a daughter and family, please."

 

I stared at him and sighed, I didn't want to hurt this old man and the fact he was terrified of me, made me feel sick. I looked at him and noticed his badge around his neck, I cleared my throat and pointed to the badge, "Does it access the lift?"

"Excuse me?" His forehead creased in confusion, sweat dripping from his head with fear.

"The badge... does it lead to Charles' office?" I explained, taking a step towards him.

"Ye-yes," he stammered with a slight nod, he then took the badge off, his hands shaking, he held it out for me. I walked towards him and grabbed the badge. I stared at him, into his faded grey eyes.

 

I looked at his many wrinkles on his face and some moles with age. "You have to come with me," I firmly stated.

"I-I gave y-you what you wanted, pl-please I have a daughter," he stuttered, "I promise I won't tell anyone."

I hated myself, but I couldn't trust him. I pulled out my gun and held the barrel to his head and demanded, "In the lift, Now!"


	29. Wolf

_**Rain**_ _**Wolf**_

 

"Don't hurt me!" He pleaded as he headed towards the lift, my gun pressing against the bag of his head, I gave him a little shove forward. The lift opened as he scanned his badge. I shoved him inside and he pressed the button the Charles' office. I kept the gun pressed against his head as the lift came to a stop. The doors opened and in front of me was a wooden door and on my left was another. I looked at him and shoved him in. "Open the door," I ordered pointing to the door ahead. The old man gulped and opened it. Before us was room that had taken centre stage in all my nightmares and dreams: Charles' quarters.

 

 

The brown wooden floors creaked under my feet. A king size bed with wolf-skin duvet and willow leaves scattered on it, the headboard pressed against the back wall, which had a window leading to the forests. There was a wardrobe opposite me, all along it, made from spruce wood. The room was mainly empty. On the left wall, opposite the bed was another wooden door and at the end of the room on the left wall was another door. I looked at the old man. "Go sit on the bed," I ordered. He walked, half-ran to it and sat down. I walked over to the bedside table and grabbed the handcuffs. Sick bastard. I grabbed his hands and handcuffed him to the bed post, "I'm sorry," I mumbled. As I headed into the room at the far end. It was just a bathroom, empty. I walked back into the room, the man watching me. I didn't look at him, I headed through the double doors.

 

To my right was a kitchen, with counters and an oven and a fridge, all along the back wall. In front of me was a dining table for two, in front of a large window that looked out onto the path and gates of the Asylum. I saw a truck below being loaded with guards to get the Newcomers. To my left was the huge TV that filled half the wall and a brown leather sofa, in front of it and next to me. A glass coffee table in front of the sofa. I remembered when Willow and I snuck into here and we watched some movies and danced around, we had the time of our lives. A tear rolled down my cheek. There was a door next to the TV and I walked up to and opened it.

 

I looked at the ladder in front of me and slowly climbed up it. I stared at the attic prison, which I'd once been locked in, it was empty. I groaned in frustration and made my way back down. I walked back into the bedroom, my eyes looking at the floor and not at him. I walked back into the elevator room and opened the door, which was now on my right, and walked into his office. Bookshelves on the back wall and a desk with a computer in the middle. Again empty. Shit. There's got to be something. Of course he'd leave. He knew I'd be coming for him.

 

Think, Rain, think! Where would he be? Where?! Agh! I don't know. I paced up and down in the office. I looked at the clock. They'd be leaving soon. But I have to find him.

"Give up," I heard a voice whisper, "please. Save yourself."

I stood frozen, my body facing the door to the lift. I slowly turned around and saw her there. Rain. Her dark brown hair down and wavy, her freckles on her pale nose and cheeks. Her green eyes deep like the forest, glinting in the light. Her black shorts ripped and her army shoes tied with huge bows, her black top cut like a cropped top.

 

"Willow?" I asked, my forehead creased with shock. I blinked, amazed at what I was seeing. She stood staring at me, her eyes sad. I went to walk up to her and hug her, but she put her hand out. Stopping me.

Willow shook her head, "Give up. Charles isn't worth your life."

"But he killed you," I whispered.

"Nobody should die because of me," Willow sadly said, her eyes locked on mine, tears in them, "Wolfie, you need to go and save your friends."

"They can save themselves," I dismissed her, and I sternly said, "I need to kill him. I need to watch the light fade out of his eyes as I stab the knife into his disgusting, rotten heart. Make him pay for what he did to you."

Willow shook her head, "This isn't you. You're not a killer, Wolfie," Willow looked at the floor and then back at me, "I know it hurts. I know you're hurting because of me-"

"Not because of you, because he-"

"Listen to me," Willow cut me off, her voice firm, "You are not a cold-blooded killer. You're beautiful Rain on a summer's day, with a courageous and loyal Wolf heart. I know you miss me and you blame him, but it isn't worth getting yourself killed."

A tear rolled down my cheek and I sobbed, "But I have nobody else left. You were my everything. And he took that away from me. He destroyed that. And he must pay."

Willow shook her head, "He will be at the Stone building. It's only five-stories. It's the last building before the checkpoints and will be laced with guards."

I stared at her, "Why are you telling me this?"

Willow shook her head, "He must be killed. But you need to be careful, sacrificing your life means he wins."

 

I looked at Willow, staring into her green eyes and I noticed the purple mist floating in the room, more tears fell down my face and I wiped them away, "Please don't leave me," I cried.

Willow stared at me, "I'll never leave. I'm always in your heart and every star that shines. I'll always be by your side, Wolfie." Then she firmly stated, "But you need to leave, now!"

I shook my head, confused, "I don't want to leave you."

Willow shouted, "This place will blow in ten seconds, get out!"

I stared at her and then I turned and ran out of the window behind me, glass shattering and fire chasing me as the building blew into thousands of pieces. White noise sounding all around me. I smacked into the floor, cutting my head, the helmet saving me from death. Pain shot through my leg and I reached around to feel a large shard of glass stuck in it. My head pounded, but I needed to move. I threw the helmet off of my head, hearing it thud on the concrete. With all my might, I dragged myself to my feet, my head spinning as I ran towards the basement.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I moved house so I didn’t post


	30. Glass

**_ Raven _ **

 

"What was that?" Clarke asked as the building shook. We were in a basement of Blue Block Tower, Clarke guarding the door as me and Monty fixed tiny parts of the radio and hacking device, following instructions left by Clara on how to make it. To say Rain knew where Emori was all this time, she still helped us out quite a lot. "How are we supposed to know?" I responded, "We're all in the same room, no windows, only one way out."

"How long have we got?" Clarke asked, ignoring my sarcasm, "How long till it's done?" Clarke asked as Clarke came over to the table me and Monty were at.

 

"Not long, don't worry, Clarke, it'll be done in no time," I reassured her.

She walked back to the door, "Do you think they're alright?" Clarke asked to nobody in particular.

"Yeah," Monty replied, "They've got Octavia, she'll keep them safe."

"And Bellamy," I added, "he's good with guns."

I looked up at Clarke, our eyes meeting, "They'll be fine. He'll be fine, Bellamy's a big boy, he can take care of himself."

Clarke looked away and at the door, "I hope you're right."

"I am," I firmly said, "you should have more confidence in him. He pulled through at the Mountain, he'll pull through again." I then looked back at the device in my hands, following Clara's instructions. I added the finishing touches and turned it back around, the screen on the front lit up and made a noise. "Hell Yeah!" I cheered and Monty smiled at me.

"The radio works too," Monty smiled and we high-fived, followed by a quick suave kiss.

"We did it!" I cheered and then I stood up and walked over to Clarke, "We can go now."

 

* * *

 

**_ Bellamy _ **

 

The building shook and a massive explosion sounded, I stood up and marched to the metal door, my gun poised.

"What was that?" Harper whispered and I heard her walk across to me. Octavia walked to the hole.

"I don't know," I said, tense. I heard a cough and I turned around to see Murphy waking up.

"What's going on?" He sleepily mumbled and then he coughed and vomited on the floor at the side of him.

"Nice," Octavia sarcastically said as she grabbed a bottle of water from the rucksack she brought, she gave it Murphy.

"John?" I heard Emori croak and I looked at her, her skin was back to normal. I walked over to her and put my hand on her head, she felt normal.

 

Murphy started to take out his needle and started to stand up, he stumbled and as he nearly hit the floor, I caught him. "Easy," I soothed him, "the drugs haven't worn off."

"You're telling me?" Murphy sarcastically laughed as he stood up and leant against Emori's table, he stared at her, "How do you feel?"

"Tired," Emori yawned.

Murphy stared at her, concern on his face, his voice worried, "And apart from that? Are you okay?"

"I'm fine, John," Emori quietly told him. Murphy sighed in relief and he kissed her passionately on the lips.

"I thought I was going to lose you," he weakly said, a tear rolling down his cheek as he kissed her again.

"You can't get rid of me that easy," she mumbled, her voice thick with sleep, "We're a team remember?"

"The best," Murphy nodded and then he removed the needle in Emori's neck, he stood up and said, "Can you get her some water please?" He still stared into her eyes. He looked at her like she was his universe, like she was the centre of his world. The way I feel about Clarke. The way I've always felt. But at least the feeling is mutual between Emori and Murphy. When Lexa was around, even before then, Clarke didn't even notice my existence. Even now, she's still in love with Lexa. Gina loved me, and I loved her, but I didn't need her like I need Clarke. Perhaps when this is all over, me and Clarke can finally have our happy ever after.

 

Octavia handed Emori a bottle of water and she chugged it down. "Easy," Murphy lightly laughed.

Emori smiled, "I'm sorry."

"It's okay," Murphy smiled, and then he hugged her and kissed her again, "I love you, y'know that, right?"

"I love you too," Emori firmly stated.

I then heard a bang on the door, me and Harper quickly turned around and aimed our guns. Murphy looked towards us, "Wait, where's Rain?" He asked.

 

I remained silent and watched the door, it moved open and we fired, the door was open a crack and then a voice, "Hold your fire!" It called. Rain. I put my gun down and nodded at Harper. Rain pushed the door open, leaning on it for support, blood running down the left side of her face, glass sticking in her left leg and soaking her black trousers. Her hair in a messy ponytail and her fringe sticking to her face with the blood, her blue eyes in pain and cloudy with tears. She had dirt covering her clothes, which was a guard uniform. Her hands covered in dirt with grazes on them.

"What happened to you?" I asked.

Rain stared at me, "I caused the explosion. Fell from three stories," Rain explained, her voice serious and her face showing her pain. She then looked at Emori and Murphy. She then looked at me, "Sun is setting, we need to move."

 

I nodded at her and she limped down the corridor, I followed her, Murphy and Emori behind me, Murphy holding Emori's hand, Harper behind them and Octavia walking last. Rain used the walls for support. We walked up some white stairs and then she scanned a door with a card and it opened revealing the forest. I looked behind me and saw the Asylum in bits and pieces, a large fire and broken glass. Rain emerged and fell flat on her face on the dirt. I saw some people running towards. Her blonde hair in the wind. "Clarke!" I called.

"Bellamy!" She called back as she ran past Rain and pulled me into a hug, "I thought you were dead when we saw the rubble."

"We're fine," I told her as she pulled back to look at my face. I turned back around to see Rain had fell on the floor, trying to get back up, "You need to help her." Clarke turned around and stared at Rain.

 

Clarke knelt down beside her, she grabbed a knife from Rain's waist band and cut her trouser leg before the knee. She removed the cut off cloth. She stared at the large shard of glass, Clarke then looked at Harper, "I need you to run to the explosion and heat up your knife, be quick."

"Okay," Harper nodded and she ran, Monty going with her.

Clarke looked at Rain, who was laid in the foetus position, clutching my hand, "This is going to hurt."

"I don't care," Rain groaned in agony, "take it out of me. And do it fast."

"Okay," Clarke nodded and I came and knelt beside Rain and grabbed her hand, she squeezed it so tight I thought my fingers were going to break. Emori and Murphy stood behind Clarke watching, holding each other's hands. Octavia knelt down beside me and looked at Rain, her eyes fearful and sympathetic to see Rain in pain. Raven stood watching from behind Rain's head. Rain cried. Clarke grabbed the glass shard, and she pulled it out making Rain scream a high pitch scream and cry, tears rolling down her cheeks. Her hand clutching mine for life.

"I'm sorry," Clarke apologised.

 

Harper came running back, "Here!" She passed Clarke the knife. Clarke breathed in sharply and then pressed the burning blade against Rain's skin, making her scream again. An ear shattering scream, she clenched my hand even tighter, my fingers going numb, more tears pouring out her eyes. Clarke then grabbed a bottle of alcohol from Octavia's bag and poured it over the ripped cloth and tied it around Rain, who was shaking and crying because of the pain.

"It's okay," I soothed her, it's easy to forget that she's still a kid, like all of us here. Rain sat up, her left leg straight in front of her, her right one under it. I pulled her into a hug and her tears soaked my shirt and she wrapped her arms around me, mine around her. I held her tight.

"We have to go," Murphy muttered and I looked at him, his own blue eyes looked sad. I could tell he cared for Rain, but she betrayed him and Emori was his world.


	31. Sewers

**_ Bellamy _ **

 

Rain leaned on me and Octavia for support as we walked through the woods, heading towards the sewers. Clarke walked next to me, Monty, Raven and Harper walked slightly behind us, talking about getting out and where they wanted to go and getting back to the Ark to get some Monty's Moonshine. Murphy and Emori walked behind them, in silence, holding each other's hands. Rain brought us to a stop. And we looked down, as we reached a dried up river bank made from concrete. There was a tunnel to the left of us and in the ravine. It had metal bars covering it, but a couple in the middle had been cut free, meaning someone had already entered the sewers. Moss hung down from the roof of it. And we ran down the ravine, I kept a firm grip on Rain, making sure she wouldn't fall and hurt herself. We entered the tunnel and the stench hit us. It smelt like shit. Obviously. It burnt my noise and made me gag.

"Sorry about the stench," Rain mumbled, looking at me.

"What stench?" I joked with a light laugh, before lifting my top and gripping it over my nose, trying to block the stench. Rain weakly laughed.

 

We trekked through the sewer sludge and water that turned our boots brown and splashed our boots. We walked for ages, slowly getting used to the stench. We marched in silence, the only sounds were our boots splashing in the water. And the muffled grunts of Rain with the pain in her leg, me and Octavia still supporting her weight.

 

* * *

 

**_ Clarke _ **

 

I walked ahead of the group, Raven not that far behind, following the map. I looked behind me at Bellamy and Octavia supporting Rain, Murphy and Emori centimetres behind them and Monty and Harper not too far behind them. Me and Raven were metres in front. I needed space. I needed to get out here. The air was tight and stench was awful. I kept walking swiftly through the water. I saw a purple mist coming towards me, I stopped and stared. What is that?

 

"Cl-Clarke," a voice stuttered in the distance, I looked ahead and saw a figure. Lexa. She walked towards me and I ran towards her, "Cl-Clarke, it's-it's me," she said. I stared at her. And stopped in my tracks, staring at her.

"I-I-I love you, Cl-Clarke," Lexa stammered as she stood centimetres away from me, sounding almost robotic but like herself. I stared into her green eyes. "Lexa?" I whispered.

"It's me," she said, staring at me, "I've missed you, Clarke."

"Clarke?" I heard Raven call, "Are you okay?" She came and rested her hand on my shoulder, I was on my knees, getting them soaked in the gross water, but I didn't care, I looked at Lexa.

"I love you, Clarke," Lexa told me, smiling, "I'm glad I found you."

"I've missed you too," I cried, my voice cracking and tears flowing from my eyes.

"Missed who?" Raven suspiciously asked and I felt her eyes looking at my face as she leaned in closer.

"Clarke, we're not safe here," Lexa told me, her forehead creasing and worry in her eyes, "we need to leave," she firmly said and she turned her back and started walking down the tunnel.

"Wait for me!" I called and I stood up and started running after.

"Where are you going?" I heard Raven calling.

 

* * *

 

**_ Raven _ **

 

"Where are you going?" I called after Clarke as she ran down the sewer tunnel. I went to call her name, but I heard a whisper.

"Raven," he whispered in my ear, I turned around and I saw him looking at me with his shaggy black hair and deep brown eyes.

"Finn?" I sighed, "What are you doing here?"

"I have something to show you," he grinned as he started walking down a tunnel to my right, "you'll love it."

I started to follow him, confused. "I don't like surprises," I muttered.

He turned around and grinned, "You'll love this one." We walked to the end of the tunnel and suddenly it was like the arc, I could see the Earth and stars, shining in the galaxy. "It's beautiful, Finn," I gasped as I looked at him, he was smiling a huge smile, he looked so good.

"Not as beautiful as you," he told me.

I heard someone shout my name and looked back towards the tunnel, "Ignore them," Finn told me and I listened.

 

* * *

 

**_ Harper _ **

 

"Raven!" Bellamy called as Raven disappeared into a tunnel on her right and Clarke ran ahead. Bellamy still supported Rose with Octavia. "What's going on?" Bellamy half-growled in frustration.

"Maybe they've both gone crazy?" Murphy rolled his eyes.

"Don't be mean, John," Emori scolded him.

"I'm not," Murphy defended himself.

We kept walking forward, I hung back as I let Monty walk behind Murphy and Emori. Something didn't feel right. Something dodgy was going on in these tunnels, and I wasn't sure what. "Hey," I heard a voice call and I looked behind me... nothing. "Harper," the voice said again and I looked in front of me and saw her standing there. I shook my head.

"You have got to try this chocolate cake!" he enthusiastically told me, his brown eyes smiling as he wiped the crumbs around his mouth from the back of his sleeve. The others kept walking but I stood still. Jasper grinned, "I've also got something to show you, you're going to love it."

"What... what is it?" I mumbled, struggling to get my words out as I twiddled a loose strand of my hair.

"If I told you, it wouldn't be a surprise, would it?" Jasper joked and I noticed that his hair was his old curls, shaggy, he was smiling. He didn't smell of alcohol either.

"No, it wouldn't be," I mumbled, shocked and confused. He killed himself. There was blood everywhere. Why am I seeing him? And why is he acting like my lover when we never were that close? He was in love with Maya, not me.

"Jasper..." Monty called and he turned in my direction, both of us facing his ghost. 

 

"Monty, he's not real." I stated, putting a hand on his shoulder, but he still stared at Jasper's ghost.

 

"Of course I'm real, Harper. You been eating some Jobi's?"

 

* * *

 

**_ Monty _ **

 

I stared at his ghost, not just his. Another figure stood behind him. But how could that be? My mom. I blinked. What? I killed her. Not on purpose, I had to.

"Monty, it's me," she sweetly smiled, "I've missed you so much, son," she told me and held her hands out for a cuddle.

"Mom?" I half-asked. Harper's eyes locked on mine and I locked on hers. She turned around and shook her head.

"Nobody's there," we both said.

"Rain," Harper called and she turned to look at us, "what's happening? I'm seeing... I'm seeing things."

Rain stood still, Bellamy and Octavia holding her.

She squinted and looked towards where Clarke had run off, there was a purple mist and it was surrounding us too.

 

Rain looked at Bellamy, worried, "Its hallucinating gas, makes you see loved ones, dead ones. Makes you go crazy. Cover your nose and mouth, don't breathe it in. And whatever they tell you, stick with me and don't listen."

I grabbed Harper's hand for support and we began to walk down.

"I'll get Clarke," Bellamy told us and he looked at Murphy and Emori, "you take Rain," he looked at me "Monty stay with Harper and protect the back."

I nodded and we moved into our new positions. Octavia looked at Bellamy, "I'll get Raven."

Bellamy nodded and they both ran off.


	32. Remorse

**_ Murphy _ **

 

I took Rain's weight on my shoulders, wrapping one arm around her waist the other clutching her arm over my shoulders, Emori did the same. We watched Bellamy and Octavia run ahead. I looked at Emori, "Don't you start hallucinating," I said to her, weakly joking.

"I've got the person I love with me," she smiled at me as we kept walking through literal shit.

I looked at the floor and smiled, blushing, and then I looked back at her, "I love you too." I then looked ahead and saw something walking towards me, a bottle in her hand, stumbling out of drunkenness.

 

I stared at her and stopped, forcing Rain and Emori to trip a little but not fall.

"What is it, John?" Emori asked me, forcing Rain to rest against the wall of the sewer as she stepped in front of me, looking into my eyes and putting her hands on my cheeks. I stared at the figure.

"It's your fault he's dead," the woman snarled... my mum. I stared at her. And shook my head.

"You're not real!" I spat.

"John," Emori called, but I couldn't look at her.

"He died trying to save you," my mother bitterly slurred, "it should've been _you_ that died, not him. He was such a great man and he died _because_ of you!" She leant against the sewer wall and spewed up all over the floor, she wiped her face with the arm not clutching the bottle and she firmly stated, "Your father died because of you!" She spat.

"No," I shook my head, a tear rolling down my face, "it wasn't my fault-"

"Of course it was!" She cut me off.

"John," Emori called, "Look at me John," I looked at her, her brown eyes staring into mine, "it's not real, John, it's not real." I stared at her and looked at Monty and Harper, coming to replace us to support Rain and then at the blurry vision of my mum, slowly disappearing. I looked back at Emori.

"I'm here, John. It's not real."

I nodded. And she kissed me on the lips, bringing me back to my senses.

 

* * *

 

**_ Octavia _ **

 

I raced down the tunnel in the direction of Raven. She was stood looking at a dead end, mesmerised. I ran up to her and put my hand on her shoulder, "Hey," I said and swallowed as she turned to face me, I shook my head, "this isn't real."

"What do you mean?" Raven asked and she looked behind me, listening to something.

I put my hands on her shoulders, "Finn is dead, Raven," I whispered, "this isn't real."

She stared at me and then she screamed, "NO! No! No!" She collapsed and I caught her in my arms as she sobbed.

"I'm sorry," I apologised, "we need to go." She rested on me for support as I walked to the end of the tunnel and walked towards the main group, I looked at Monty and Harper, "Take care of her," I told them, "I'm going after Bellamy."

 

I turned back around and raced towards the end of the tunnel, where I could hear sobs. I saw Clarke crouched down in the middle of the sewer, a ladder a few metres in front of her, at least Lexa led her to this place. I saw Bellamy in the corner rocking back and forth. I put my hand on Clarke and she looked at me, tears falling from her eyes. "She's gone! She's gone! She's gone!" Clarke sobbed, "I couldn't save her," she shook her head, crying.

"It's okay," I softly said, "it's not your fault."

"She's dead like Finn and Wells and my dad," Clarke sobbed, her hands in her lap, her knees in the sewage water, tears falling continuously from her eyes.

"It's not your fault," I repeated, swallowing, frightened I might cry.

"I'm sorry," Bellamy choked from the corner and I glanced at him. He had his back against the wall, his knees to his chest, his arms wrapped around them. I looked back at Clarke, she was a mess.

"I didn't want them to die," she cried as she stared at me, "I never meant for this to happen."

"I know you didn't, Clarke, but we need you and you need to pull yourself together," I firmly said.

"I wish she didn't die, I loved her so much," Clarke sobbed and she grabbed my arm, holding onto it for dear life.

"Clarke, you need to get up," I firmly said, looking into her eyes, "A warrior doesn't mourn until the battle is over."

 

"I taught you well," I heard a voice whisper behind me and my body tightened, Lincoln. I ignored him.

"Clarke, get up!" I half-shouted, and I looked at Bellamy, "Help me!"

"Octavia," he weakly shook his head, "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to kill him. I didn't mean for mum to die," I stared at him, tears filling my own eyes, "I just wanted to... to protect you. Please forgive me."

I shook my head, "Get up, Bellamy!" I demanded, "Help me! This isn't the place for remorse and guilt!"

"I love you, Octavia of the Sky people," Lincoln whispered behind me. I turned to look at him.

"You're not real," I spat.

"Octavia, I-" he was cut off by my blade running through his ghost.

 

Bellamy stared at me and I ran over to him and pulled at his arm, I growled, "Get up, Bellamy. If you want my forgiveness, help me!"

He stared at me.

"Please," I half-begged. I heard the others not far behind me, stomping through the sewage.

Bellamy stared at me, "I'm sorry," he looked back at the floor.

"I need you," I half-cried, tears threatening to pour, "I need you, Bell. I can't do this without you." He stared at me and suddenly his arms were around me, pulling me into a hug. A few tears escaped and then we pulled apart and he stood up.

"I'm sorry," he shook his head and then he ran to Clarke, he crouched in front of her, "Princess, we need to move," he firmly stated and she stared at him still dazed.

 

"I loved her, Bellamy." she cried, her heart breaking for the thousandth time, "I loved her so much. I never meant to hurt you and I am so sorry for leaving you. But I loved her, Bellamy. With all of my heart."

 

Bellamy nodded, "I know you did." I could see his inner conflict. He loved Clarke the way she loved Lexa, the way I loved Lincoln. He felt it. The guilt hitting him at full force. But, I meant it, I need him. I've punished him far too long. He was grieving for Clarke when she abandoned him, all of us, after the mountain fell. He blamed the grounders for the fall of Mountain Weather, for the death of Gina too. And although the love he felt for Gina doesn't compare to the love he felt for Clarke, he was grieving when he followed Pike into battle. Sometimes we lose ourselves when we lose the people we love.

 

Clarke wiped her cheeks, "I-I need to go. We all do." She looked up above us, "Up here," Clarke instructed as she pointed to the ladder and begun to climb up it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I haven’t been posting everyday, I moved house and it’s been tiring and my internet is dodgy


	33. Warehouse

**_ Bellamy _ **

 

I put my hand on the slat of floor above me, wrapping my left arm around the ladder so I didn't fall. I gently slid the floorboard backwards, creating a gap of light. Light flooded into the tunnel and made my eyes water. I squinted and stared. White tiles clinically covered the walls and floors, reflecting the light around the the empty, quiet room. Everything was silent, minus the distant chattering and someone banging on mental bars. The room was empty. I shoved the floorboard back, forcing more light into the tunnel. I pulled myself out of the tunnel and heard footsteps behind me, it wasn't long before Octavia stood by my side. The door opposite the hatch was shut, Octavia stood by it, keeping guard.

 

"It's clear," I called down the hatch and watched as Clarke climbed up. I grabbed her hand as I pulled her up, like the time on the ground where she almost fell to her death. I looked in her blue eyes, still watery from her visions. I hated seeing her like that, in so much pain. I wish I could protect her, but she doesn't need that. She's strong enough. Clarke joined Octavia.

"We need your help," Murphy called up and I saw him looking up at the bottom of the ladder, "Rain can't climb, me, Harper and Monty are going to give her a boost, you think you can grab her?"

I nodded.

 

I watched Rain grab the ladder and pull herself up. I saw Murphy and Harper and Monty stand behind her, pushing her butt up, as she grabbed more ladder and tried to heave herself up, she winced in pain. I put my gun on the floor and crouched down, holding out my hands. Rain's hands grabbed mine and I pulled her. She grunted in pain. I wrapped my arms around her waist and dragged her up.

"She's almost there!" I grunted. I heard someone stand on the ladder and with a final heave, I pulled Rain up. She was laid on top of me, both of us breathless. We stared at each other, awkwardly, before Octavia came over and helped Rain to her feet. I got to mine and called, "It's clear."

 

I walked over to Rain, Clarke and Octavia, who were stood by the door, as Harper emerged from the ladder, followed by Raven, Monty, Emori and Murphy. "So what's the plan?" I asked.

Rain looked at me, "We need uniforms, they're at the end of the corridor," she pointed through the small glass window in the door, down a long corridor, which was empty, Rain continued, "Raven, Monty, Harper and Octavia are going to get more weapons and connect the technology to the server," she then looked at Clarke, "Clarke, Emori and Murphy are going to get food for us. Were miles from your people and will be on the road for ages."

"And us?" I enquired, raising my eyebrow.

"We're getting the truck," Rain stated.

"Can't I go with Clarke?" I asked, the words leaving my mouth without thinking.

Rain shook her head, "No, I need someone else with me."

"Take Murphy," I said, pointing towards Murphy, who was sat with Emori on a cabinet just behind the hatch, holding her hand.

"He's with Emori," Rain mumbled, looking down.

Clarke then put her hands on arms and looked into my eyes, "I'll be fine."

I stared at her, her face scraped and covered in scars, from previous battles. She was a warrior, but I couldn't lose her. I looked at O, she's changed the most out of all of us. Her eyes cold and full of anger, Clarke's full of grief and hurt. I tried my best to protect them both, but it never works.

"I promise," Clarke promised me, breaking me from my trance.

I nodded and pulled her into a hug, "Be careful," I whispered in her hair.

Rain opened the door.

 

* * *

 

We were crouched behind a wooden crate in a warehouse kind of area. The room had grey concrete floor and grey walls, with ten vans in front of us, we were behind the second. Stairs to the left of us and the door, where we came from. At the opposite end was another door, with a guard in front of it. Rain said that we needed to get in there, where there'd be another five vans. The only problem was the ten guards patrolling the area. I turned the radio off in my pocket, we managed to get three, changing the frequency to match the Asylum's - no guard would be using it.

 

Rain crouched next to the crate, her back pressed against it as she looked towards the right, I looked left, towards the stairs and two guards standing in the corner drinking and laughing. I looked at Rain and she looked at me. Her white cap covered her fringe, her face still had dried blood covering it, mixed in with mud and dirt. The only thing standing out was her blue eyes, her fringe covering her right one. We both wore uniform, it was light. A white bullet proof vest, with a blue cotton long sleeved top underneath, with white trousers, the ends tucked into the black army boots. On our hands was white, fingerless gloves and white caps on our head with white framed sunglasses. We held our guns securely in our hands, Rain had her knife in her belt. The guards in this room also wore white waterproof leather jackets, some with helmets, like a biker would wear. Our clothes were in a rucksack, which I carried on my back.

 

"What are we doing?" I mouthed to her.

She looked to the van across us and pointed towards it, she looked at the guard blocking the door, then at the two on my left. She said there'd be another seven, they were either standing next to the garage doors, in between the trucks or in them. The guard leant against the wall, his ankles crossed, his gun held in his hands. Rain looked at the back wall, there was another crate pushed against it. Rain crawled over to it and cracked it open a little, she crawled back over to me, gripping two apples, one in each hand. She looked at the guard and launched the first apple in the air, the guard stood up and walked towards it, they bent down, picking it up. Rain launched another one, it bounced against the door. The guard stood up alerted. Rain launched herself over the crate and I followed her. She rolled on the floor and slid under the truck opposite us. I followed. We laid on our stomachs.

 

"Hey are you guys fucking with me?" A male voice called, me and Rain looked at each other as we heard footsteps.

"Why?" One of the guards behind us called.

"Just, apples keep appearing," he responded. I turned my attention back to Rain, who was starting to army crawl to the next truck, I followed.

 

Finally at the last truck, the door insight. The guard was no longer guarding the door, he was at the other end. We made a run for it. We slipped inside, unnoticed. Once inside, Rain pushed over a locker, barricading the door, before heading towards the end truck.


	34. Stare

**_ Bellamy _ **

 

We sat in the end truck, the garage was dead. The only light we had was from the truck, and it was very dim, flickering every now and then. I sat in the driver seat, my gun on the dashboard, my back against the door, my feet resting on the middle seat. Rain sat in the far passenger seat, her legs on the dashboard, her ankles crossed. She had her bullet proof vest on the floor along with her blue sleeved top, she had her vest top on, her necklaces dangling. The wolf and willow tree on a bracelet made from rope on her right arm, the heart on a gold chain and the diamond on a silver one, resting in between her breasts. I looked at her, she was drawing on a notepad she found. I looked at her arm and the green blemishes decorating it. I'd never seen her arm before, it looked sore and rotten, strange with her dark complexion.

 

"It's rude to stare," Rain stated, not looking at me and breaking the silence.

"Sorry," I apologised and looked out the windscreen at the metal shutters.

"It's okay," Rain dismissed, she chucked the pad next to my feet and placed the pencil next to it, she looked at me and I looked at her, at her eyes. "I'd stare too," Rain half-smiled with a shrug.

"We all have scars," I mumbled, looking out the windscreen. I had many scars, not many physical, many of them mental.

"You love her, don't you," Rain stated, it wasn't a question. I looked back at her, and remained silent. Rain put her feet down, moving her left leg next to mine on the seat and letting her right one dangle, her back pressed against the door, her arms folded.

 

"I can tell," Rain stated, "You look at her the way Murphy looks at Emori..." Rain paused, she sat up a little, and sadly shook her head, "but she doesn't notice. With Murphy and Emori they look at each other with such love and passion, that they can't bare to lose one another. They need each other." Rain looked at fiddled the willow tree on her bracelet and fiddled with it, she then looked back up at me, "You need Clarke. You love her so much it kills you."

"You feel this way about... Octavia?" I asked, my tone flat and gravelly. Rain was both right and wrong. I do need Clarke, I love her to the point it hurts. But Clarke does care about me, and somewhere deep down, she loves me too. Things are complicated right now, she's still grieving for Lexa. And I will wait until she's ready to love me, I will give her time if that's what she needs.

 

Rain ignored me, staring back out the windscreen.

I kept pushing, trying to figure out what was going on between her and my sister, "Since you rescued Monty, you've become close. You kissed her back in the blood transfusion place. She cares for you, I see it in her eyes. She's a little less lost when she's with you. Do you feel the same?"

She looked up at me, through her fringe, "I-I don't know. We have shared the same experiences, I guess. And we have grown close, but I don't think it will last."

"Why not?" I asked, my forehead creasing. I hoped she wasn't going to hurt my sister even more, Octavia likes to put on the cold-hearted persona, but I know she's fragile inside.

She shrugged, "Because nothing good ever does. People either leave or die. That's how it is in this world."

 

Her words stung, is that really what's become of this world? I didn't think so. Happy Endings exist somewhere, Clarke came back. "You miss her," I stated nodding towards the bracelet she was still fiddling with.

"Miss her?" She sarcastically laughed, and then she sincerely said, "it fucking kills." She shook her head and a tear rolled down.

"My girlfriend died," I confessed, I then looked out the windscreen, remembering Gina. But what I felt for Gina was nothing compared to what I felt and feel for Clarke. I loved Gina, but I didn't need her, I wasn't in-love with her, the way I am with Clarke.

 

"Sorry to hear that," Rain mumbled and I looked back at her, she was facing the windscreen and I saw a tear glistening, in the dim light, as it rolled down her cheek. She then looked back at me and wiped her tears away, her tone slightly bitter and aggressive, "it just sucks! It sucks so much! This shitty world. Everyone we love and care about either dies or leaves. I hate this shithole! I wish it was me. I wish it was me, not Willow. It should've been me," she broke off, her rage turning into sobs. She turned to face the windscreen, her right foot now resting on her seat, her knee pulled up to her chest, her right elbow resting on it and her hand clenched in her fist, covering her mouth, her left leg on the floor, bouncing up and down. "She was the good one," Rain bitterly cried, "She'd know what to do. She wouldn't have let so many people die. I wish it was her here, not me."

"You have us," the words left my tongue, Rain looked at me, her cheeks wet with tears.

She weakly said, "We both know that's a lie."

"It's not," I shook my head, tears making my own voice hoarse as I held them back, "We've made it this far, we can't give up now. We're a team."

 

Rain looked at me, my words hanging in the air. Silence all around us. Rain shook her head as she sobbed, "It's so hard." I came over and sat in the seat next to her, putting my arm around her, she rested her head on my shoulder. "It's so hard," she repeated, "I'm trying to be strong but the last thing I saw was my father getting shot in front of me," she looked at me, tears still pouring, "I don't know if my mum's still alive. And Willow... Willow, the first person to show me what living is. The girl with her brown wavy hair, bright green eyes and dimples that she hated. The girl who saved me, so many times. She's..." Rain trailed off and swallowed, she looked me in my eyes, "She's dead." I pulled her close, her head in my chest. Her sobs echoing in the van. I stroked her hair, as she let all her tears out. She's grieving, like Clarke. Clarke has lost so many people, like Rose. And I can't imagine how it would feel if I lost Clarke. Clarke is Rose's Melody, Clarke is Murphy's Emori, Clarke is Jasper's Maya, Clarke is Octavia's Lincoln. Clarke is Clarke's Lexa. Clarke is the thing that could destroy me. Clarke is the thing I would let destroy me.

 

* * *

 

I stared out the windscreen, into the darkness. The radio rested behind the steering wheel. I held Rain in my arms, her head on my chest, I felt her fiddling with one of her necklaces, her sobs had stopped, my blue-cotton shirt wet, as my bullet proof vest was under the seat with Rain's. Rain moved away from me, her back against the seat, her legs back on the dashboard, with her ankles crossed, her hands together, in between her legs. I looked at her, still leaning slightly forward with my feet on the ground. She stared at the windscreen.

"It won't hurt forever," I mumbled.

She swallowed, and nodded, "I know it won't," she then made contact with me, "Clarke needs you. And Octavia will forgive you."

I didn't reply, unsure if Octavia could forgive me and even then I wasn't sure I deserved it. Despite what Clarke told me.

Rain firmly said, "It wasn't your fault, Bellamy. You did what you thought was right."

"I hope you're right," I mumbled.

Rain leaned forward, putting her legs back down and putting her hands on her lap, she looked at me, "I am right."


	35. Streets

**_ Bellamy _ **

 

I'm pretty sure the sun must be setting by now, they had been gone so long. I tapped my fingers, growing more and more worried. Luckily, just as I was about to turn on the radio, Rain looked into her side mirror, "They're here."

 

We both got out the car as Clarke came running up to me, a big rucksack on her back, she pulled me into a hug.

"What's that for?" I asked as we pulled away.

"You weren't replying on your radio," Clarke explained, her words hurried and slightly panicked, "I thought something had happened."

"No," I shook my head, "we turned it off because of the guards and must've forgot to turn it on."

"Don't do that again, Bel," Octavia scolded as she walked up to me.

"I'm sorry," I apologised to my little sister.

"We got shit tons of food," Murphy announced.

I looked at Rain, who was leaning against the truck behind us, "Are we ready to go?"

"Yep," she nodded, and then she looked at us, "I think me, Bellamy and Clarke should ride up front. We'll be making a stop on the way, so when I get out, Raven can come and take my spot. We'll bang on the truck when it's time to activate the device."

Clarke turned to Rain and walked up to her, "Thank you."

"For what?" Rain asked, surprised.

"Helping us," Clarke sincerely said, "you could've let us die or betrayed us. But you've helped us, and I'm grateful."

Rain shrugged and scratched her bad arm, which was now covered by the blue top, "Thanks for sticking with me."

 

I then heard the back doors of the truck open and saw Murphy and Emori climbing in, with their new-found rucksacks. I walked around to the back of the truck and saw them sat against the right side of it, Murphy furthest back. Raven sat opposite Murphy, followed by Harper and Monty. Octavia sat next to Emori. The food rucksacks in the middle. Raven clutching her computer device, Harper holding a walkie talkie. Octavia handed me the other one. "This is it," she smiled, "Finally going to see the forests again."

"I hope so," I smiled before shutting the van doors and climbing into the drivers side. I would be driving, Clarke in between me and Rain. Rain was putting on her bullet proof vest and cap. Clarke looked strange in uniform, her clothes were in the back in a rucksack, along with everyone else's.

Rain put on her seatbelt and me and Clarke copied. Rain looked at me, "Let's go."

The garage door opened, revealing a road surrounded by trees. I turned the key in the ignition, bringing it to life.

Rain announced, "Welcome to The Lost City."

 

* * *

 

We drove for miles and miles down empty, sandy streets, surrounded by skyscrapers and broken houses. I knew some of the streets for when we had our home here. As we drove further out the city, the streets became more desolate apart from the odd truck or van. We had the windows down, air blowing through, Rain held her arm out of it, resting her head on her arm. Clarke held a map in her hands, directing me and every once in awhile she glanced up at the sand surrounding us. Rain eventually directed us off road as we drove alongside a river, she said it was the Arkansas River. The sun glinted off of the river, making it a sight for sore eyes.

 

After hours of following the river, we turned off and headed back into a new village. The system. The system was full of checkpoints and army barracks and a few shantytown buildings, filled with poor people. We drove past people sat on the street, starving in tatted clothing. Some people had Radiation Mutations and many tried to bang on the truck, chucking stones at it.

 

"Why are they so mad at us?" Clarke asked as we slowly drove down a street, which had people shouting and pelting stones at us.

"Because," Rain begun to explain, her arm inside the truck and the window up, "Lots of these people have their families kidnapped to become lab rats. They have no food and are expendable. They're homes are destroyed, they can't leave the city but they want to. They have had their lives stolen from them. At least back in The Lost City and The Asylum and Farm Station, we had food and clean clothes and beds to sleep in. These people don't." Rain shook her head, she then pulled a rucksacks from under her seat, it was Clarke's and contained food and water. Rain opened her window and threw an apple to a little girl, who was sat on the street corner, shivering and covering her face. She looked at us and mouthed "Thank you." Rain nodded and threw a few more apples and pears into the street. The crowd nodded as they received it. Rain then grabbed the rucksack and took out half the bottles of water and some food, she then chucked the rest of the rucksack out the window.

"What are you doing?" I asked her, still focusing on the road.

"They're starving," Rain muttered as she wound her window shut.

 

* * *

 

We arrived at the second check point after getting through the first. We were stuck in traffic, surrounded by officers and people on patrol. A male guard, wearing a grey cotton long-sleeved top, with a black bullet proof vest, grey bottoms and black army shoes, on his head was a grey cap. He stood with another five men, dressed how he was. He held a notepad in his hands and leaned in the window.

"You heading out the city?" He asked, as he looked me in the eye.

I nodded, my hands gripping on the steering wheel, "Yes, we're going to see if there's any grounders or Space people in the area," I looked out the windscreen at the truck ahead of us, also being checked.

"But The Asylum was crushed?" He questioned, his tone full of suspicion.

"But farm station is still standing," I firmly said, I then looked at him, and half-shouted, "should a bouncer be questioning my authority?"

He took a step back, "No, Sir. I'm sorry, sir," he apologised. He then looked up at me, and then at Clarke and Rain, "Should they be going with you?"

"Of course," I stated, I then looked at him and gestured for him to walk closer to me, he stood with his head in the window and I aggressively whispered in his ear, "Questioning my authority again, Stevenson?"

"No, Sir," his voice was panicked and he swallowed hard, he stepped back and declared, "Clear. Drive on."

 

We drove out of ear shot, heading towards the final checkpoint. "How did you know his name?" Clarke asked me, looking at me.

I glanced at her and then touched my ear, "Raven didn't just make radios, she made me an ear piece."

"She did good," Clarke nodded.

Rain then looked at us, "I don't mean to spoil the mood, but, we have a job to do."

"We're just driving out?" I asked, confused.

Rain shook her head and looked at the road ahead, "We need to make a stop."

"This isn't the plan," Clarke argued.

Rain then looked at Clarke, "Do you want to be brought here again or have your people and the grounders killed? Brought here for testing?"

Clarke shook her head and then she firmly asked, "What do we do?"

Rain looked back at the road, "I kill Charles. I upload a file explaining what they're doing, saying there is other people out there. Saying Charles is dead," she then looked at Clarke, "I'd become in charge by default. The slayer wins, I'd set the people free, leave someone I can trust in charge."

I nodded, "Sounds like a plan. Where do we go?"


	36. Speech

**_ Rain _ **

 

The truck pulled up behind a building, it was empty. We were at the final Barracks, a place with three streets of buildings, in the middle was Charles' - it was the escape Castle. A building, three stories high, like a normal house. Nothing fancy. I got out the truck, they knew what to do. Wait, until I gave the signal on the radio. I walked down the streets, the sun still shining. All of the streets dead, all of the guard down here would be with him. Obviously, I couldn't walk through the front door; that'd be straight up suicide.

 

I found a grate. Great. I managed to lift it off and the stench of the sewers hit me and made me gag, it was awful. I grabbed a piece of cloth from around my belt. My belt held a knife and a handgun as well as piece of cloth and water bottle. I also wore a rucksack in my back, full of various supplies. I kissed the heart around my neck and jumped down into the sewers, covering my mouth. I landed on my two feet in a puddle. The sewers were dark, I grabbed a torch from inside my pocket, it was tiny but did the job. I walked through the sewers, scanning the walls and distance for any mist, but none existed. I reached the end and climbed up a small ladder, it was rusted and had moss growing on it. It shook with every step. My foot broke a rung on the ladder, I almost screamed, but I regained balanced and reached the top, pushing open another grate. This grate was in the basement of the house. I heard talking.

 

Charles was clearly expecting me. I looked in the basement and saw willow tree leaves from the grate leading to another ladder at the back of the basement, towards the left of the door opposite the grate. I looked at the ladder, it went pretty high up. One foot forward as my hands clasped the cold, silver ladder and begun climbing. It led to the top floor, where more leaves awaited me. I rested my hand on the door handle and opened the door a crack, there was two guards stood at the end of the corridor, in front of a wooden double door with a golden door frame. I listened carefully and detected another two to the left of the door. I breathed in. I swung the door open and fired at the two ahead, killing them. I ducked down as two bullets came through the wooden door. I stood up and fired two more bullets. I Shut the door and saw two dead bodies slumped against another door and heard footsteps rushing.

 

I turned and ran down the hall to the double wooden door, I opened it and slammed it shut. On either side was a bookshelf, I pushed the one on the right, blocking the door. I turned around and took in the room. The spruce wood flooring, the massive glass window at the back of the building (my exit), the desk looking out onto the glass, which revealed a beautiful forest, just behind the house behind this building. There was also a sofa on the right, it was brown and leather, facing the right wall, which had a fireplace burning and spruce bookshelves either side of it. A willow tree sappling trying to grow in a plant pot on the mantle piece and a wolf's head hanging above the fire. On the left was another double door it swung open.

 

"I wondered when you'd get here," Charles smiled, but it was false. He held two glasses in his hand, he held one out to me, "This is wine, a hundred years old, but beautiful all the same." I stared at his extended tanned hand. His face was clean shaved and his grey hair reached his shoulders, his glasses covering his grey eyes. His face covered in wrinkles as well as his hands. He walked up to the desk and placed a glass on it, before taking a sip of his own. He was dressed in a black cords, a blue shirt, a black waistcoat, with a red rose in his waistcoat pocket and black shoes. He looked at me and smiled, "We're friends, no need to be quiet, my little wolf."

I launched at him and threw him against the wall, causing him to drop his glass and smash it, he laughed, "My, my, my little wolf, you are feisty."

"We are not friends." I growled, my hands grabbing his shirt and pinning him to the wall.

"There's no need to be like this," he calmly said, he wasn't scared at all, "despite what you think, we are friends. And I'm not going to stop you from doing what you want to do."

I stared at him and then dragged him over to the chair by the desk. I grabbed a pair of handcuffs from my belt, found with the uniform, and handcuffed him to the chair.

"This really isn't necessary," he shook his head, his tone casual as if he was my friend.

"Shut it!" I snapped at him and gagged him with my cloth.

 

I placed my rucksack on the table and unzipped it. I turned to the computer and plugged in the microphone. I clicked on all Cameras and Speakers and TVs, the camera on the computer loaded, filled with my face. My face, covered in dirt and blood and matted hair. The cap still on my head and the uniform.

 

Could I do this?

 

"Welcome, The Asylum, The Lost City, Farm Station, The System and The rebels," I spoke in the microphone, my voice a little shaky. This was being broadcasted everywhere. My voice through every speaker, my face on every screen. I cleared my throat and firmly stated, "Charles has been overthrown. He's been lying to you. There is more of us out there. I grabbed a map from my pocket, drawn by Willow and held it to the camera. I then grabbed the notepad, which was from the truck, and pulled it out my rucksack. I held it to the camera, I'd drawn a portrait of every delinquent on the road trip down here. I flicked through it and spoke, "These people are from Space," I then turned the page to Emori, "And this one is from the outside, from the ground." I put the pad down and grabbed some photos from the rucksack, the ones me and Willow took, I held one of the experiments, one of the lab, one of weak people, tied to the metal beds, one of a turned person, "Charles has been locking people up under The Asylum, he has been injecting radiation into them, torturing them and ultimately killing them. And it's not just outsiders, it's your mothers and fathers and children, sisters, brothers - he has no limits." I then looked in the camera, "The Rebels were right. I am stopping this now. No more torture and experiments. No more killing. People of The Lost City, you are free. May you find peace."


	37. Sister

**_ Rain _ **

 

"The Rebels were right. I am stopping this now. No more torture and experiments. No more killing. People of The Lost City, you are free. May you find home," I concluded as I shut the camera off. I shoved my stuff back in the rucksack and threw it on my back, I felt Charles watching me. Shouts came from outside the door, people trying to break it down. Some begging for Charles's blood and some begging for mine.

 

"So, you're just going to leave?" Charles enquired and I looked at him. "You promised them my life and yet here I am, breathing."

I stood straight, my rucksack on my back, my gun in my belt. I stared at the old man, his eyes still bright and happy. I'm not a killer. Well... not by choice. Could I really kill this man?

"What are you waiting for? This is your last chance." Charles locked eyes with me. "Or are you reconsidering? Considering we _both_ know you forget to tell them some of _your_ knowledge."

Hairs stood on the back of my neck. He knows that I know. Am I as bad as him; Refusing to tell my people my knowledge?

 

"I can keep you alive, My little wolf," he stated, his eyes burning into me, "We both know that the world is ending. I can _save_ you." he paused, I stood still, listening to him, ignoring the noise from the soldiers outside, "That's what Clara wanted to do."

"Don't talk about her," I muttered, my voice croaky.

"She didn't betray you-"

"She got Willow killed," I coldly stated, "you got Willow killed."

Charles shook his head, "Clara told me about your... plan. I told her I could save you. I was going to take you and Clara and your friends into my bunker. Keep you safe, keep humanity safe for another two-hundred years."

I shook my head, "Bullshit. If that was true, you wouldn't have killed us."

"I like you, my little wolf, I never intended to harm her, to harm _Willow_."

"Don't talk about her!" I snapped and pulled my gun out, aiming it at his head, "You killed her. You captured me. You kept me locked up whilst doctors shoved needles in me. You _killed_ eleven of my people. You need to pay."

 

"I didn't know that they took you," Charles admitted, he looked at the floor for a brief second before his eyes met mine again, "You're special, my little wolf. The scientists wanted you. As soon as I found out, your people were already killing my men. I wanted to save-"

"Then why did you kill Esmé and Delilah? Why did you kill Willow?" I half-shouted stepping closer towards him, the gun centimetres away from his forehead.

He shook his head, "I never killed her, my little Wolf-"

"Bullshit!" I screamed and smacked him with the gun, cutting his head, before placing the barrel against his skull.

"You're not going to kill me," he firmly said, his eyes still locked on mine, "Besides, _you_ killed them all. _You_ shot Clara, gave Esmé the gun, _you_ killed those people back at your camp. You. Killed. Your. Songbird."

"Don't call her that!" I roared, jamming the gun harder into his head.

Charles bitterly said, "You lead them all to their deaths. If you had come with me, Willow would still be with us. Willow got shot because of you. You killed her. I just watched. You murdered the only person you loved. And Melody-"

"What about Mel?" I snapped, trying to block his words out from my head.

"You killed your sister." Charles stated.

"No-"

"Yes! You killed your sister, Melody. You killed your father. You killed your sister. And you dug that knife into Wil-" my gun fired. Blood poured out the hole in his forehead.

 

"Rain! We've got to go!" The radio crackled in my pocket, Bellamy. I stared at Charles's dead body. I looked to my left and saw a hole in the bookcase. A guard looked at me. "You're dead!" They shouted and I saw them poke their gun through and they fired, barely missing me. I picked up the radio, "I'm coming." Behind Charles was an axe for fires, I smashed the glass with my gun, grabbed the axe and as the guards burst in the room, I ran towards the window and smashed through the glass with my axe.

 

I landed on the van, winding myself and digging the axe in the roof. The van whizzed through the streets, almost knocking me off. The van came to a sudden stop. I screamed as I almost fell off, but managed to hook myself on to the bar on top of the van roof with my axe. I heard a gun shot and felt a bullet graze my leg, making me yelp. I pulled out my gun and fired, seconds later a man coughed and I heard him fall.

 

"Hold your fire!" A voice called from behind me. I rolled over and aimed my gun at a man dressed in black uniform, a helmet covering his face. I heard the van doors open, Bellamy stood on my right, Clarke on my left. I saw Emori and Murphy not far behind Clarke, Raven and Octavia next to Bellamy, the others must be round the back. I saw people in the same uniform as the man in front of me, surrounding us. I held the gun to his head. "Don't shoot!" He surrendered dropping his gun, "We're the rebels."

"Rain?" Bellamy called, waiting instructions.

The rebel lifted off his helmet and I stared. tanned skin and Chocolate brown eyes stared back at me smiling. His hair was shaggier and he had A little bit of stubble on his face. "Jonah?" I gasped as I got to my feet.

He nodded.

"Jonah!" I exclaimed as he pulled me into a hug. I felt Bellamy stood next to me, I looked over and saw him aiming his gun.

"Do you know him?" Bellamy asked, still cautious.

I nodded, and happily-sighed, "Know him? He's my second."

 

I then turned my attention back to Jonah, "I thought you were dead."

He shook his head, "No. Ten of us made it," he explained, and then he smiled at me, "Thank you. Our people will be safe at last. Me and Delilah-"

"Delilah?" I interrupted, "You mean she's not dead?"

He nodded, "Yeah, it was tranquilliser. The guard was a rebel and he helped us stage it," he paused and then looked at me, "Thanks for helping us take this place, we're just waiting for orders from our captain."

"Who's that?" I asked him.

"You."


	38. Sea

**_ Clarke _ **

 

The wind whipped around my legs as I stood on the edge of the beach, the waves moving calmly in and out and the sun setting in the distance. We weren't far from home now, another day and we'd be there, we just needed a break, time to stop and gather ourselves. We've already been on the road for an extra two days, the total drive is 21 and a half hours, Raven drove seven a day, so we can rest and eat and stretch our legs. The rest of my people sat on the beach around a fire, roasting squirrels that we'd caught and eating berries we'd found.

 

I watched the tide moving in and out; I knew what was facing us back at home. Facing what Allie had told me. Facing my people, who looked at me to guide them. I don't know if I'm strong enough. I'm trying so hard, so, so hard...

 

My feelings are scattered all over the place. My head still scrambled from the mist; seeing her again just reminded me of the grief I had being trying to suppress. I had to remain strong for my people; Lexa was right. Feelings can make you weak; they can cloud your judgement and break you.

 

But, feelings can empower you, like Octavia. I know she's lost right now, but she has become such a strong force that I don't think anyone could ever take her down. I know she's cold, but maybe that's what you have to be Survive. Heartless.

 

....

 

I don't believe that.

 

Not really.

 

I am mourning Lexa and everyone else I have lost. But that does not make me weak. And with Bellamy's help, we will find a way to stop the end of the world.

 

I still can't keep thinking if it is even worth it. Saving us... all we do is destroy ourselves and each other. Will it ever stop? Will we always be struggling to survive? Struggling to decide what is good and what isn't? I've killed so many people. So much blood on my hands. I've hurt so many people. We all were against Murphy but he's the one who has killed the least amount of people. Maybe me and Bellamy are the bad guys. But I never asked for this. I never asked to be a leader, I was thrown into the role. People looking to me for answers that I don't have. How can I tell them that we will survive when I'm struggling to believe it myself?

 

"Hey," I heard a voice whisper and I turned my head to the left to see Rain standing next to me, in her hands was a squirrel on a stick she ate it silently next to me, looking out to the sea. Her hair blew out behind her and her blue eyes full of sadness. I turned my attention back towards the crashing waves that were drowning me. Rain cleared her throat and she mumbled, "You know, don't you?"

"Know what?" I asked, looking at her, she looked back at me.

"That the world's ending," Rain sadly said as she looked back at the view in front of us, the sun had gone now and a black sky appeared. We could hear laughter from the camp behind us, Harper seemed happier. I wish I was.

 

I remained silent.

Rain continued and I saw her shake her head, "The others don't. My people included," Rain took a step towards me and I looked at her, Rain continued, "We're not that different, Clarke. We've both killed people, and we both have people looking to us," she then glanced towards the forest and back at me, "I left my people behind. I heard you did the same once." Rain confessed as she came closer towards me. I turned my body to face hers and she did the same. I felt tears in my eyes and swallowed. Remembering the time I left my people, I thought they could survive on their own. I was wrong. They needed me, _Bellamy_ needed me.

 

"I-I don't know how to save them," I confessed, I looked into her eyes, a deeper blue than my own.

Rain looked at the floor. "I-I do."

I looked up at her, my forehead creasing, "What? How?"

Rain went in her jacket pocket, pulling out a crumpled piece of paper, she handed it towards me, "During my time in the Asylum, Esme used her intellect to research the history of this place. The Mountain of course would've been the most viable bunker solution, but you destroyed it."

 

I nodded, feeling my stomach twisting. If only we knew the reality of what was coming, perhaps we would've found an alternative solution. But there's no time to wallow in regrets.

 

I grabbed the piece of paper, opening it to see a map with coordinates and stars. Rain explained, "There were several bunkers made to protect the higher ups, the rich and famous too. The Asylum is one of them, but your people shouldn't go there. Mine will take refuge in there and I would appreciate it if Wanheda didn't take over after all we've done-"

"Wanheda?" I looked up at her, why did she call me that?

Rain nodded, "Charles had it on your file, and it seems Jonah had found some wandering grounders, they told him about you. About everything you've done - you've done so much, Clarke. You _deserve_ a shot at happiness."

I turned my attention back to the map, "So what are the stars? Bunkers?"

Rain nodded, "Yes, a lot of them will have been destroyed or become inaccessible. Some may be missing vital equipment or it may be rusted and broken. But one of them has to work, it's called the Second Dawn. I guess whatever happens, it'll be the third."

 

I folded the map, smiling at Rain, "Thank you."

Rain shrugged, "Its the least I could do." She looked over her shoulder at Murphy and Emori laying on the beach, laughing and joking about something. I don't think I've ever seen him so happy.

I put a hand on her arm, comforting, she looked back at me, "He forgives you, Rain."

She shrugged, "She almost died because of me."

I softly said, "It wasn't your fault. None of this was. He forgives you; if it wasn't for you, we never would've made it out. _You're_ one of _us_ now, Rain."

Rain shook her head, "Thanks but I'm not staying with you guys either."

"What? What about the death wave?" I asked, surprised and concerned for Rain's well-being. Rain grabbed her knife from her belt, holding it above her palm. My eyes widened in fear, "What are you doing?"

She sliced her palm, wincing slightly, saying, "Look."

I watched as dark, black blood trickled out of the cut... "Nitblida?"

Rain nodded as she put her knife away, "The injections they gave us back underground, in England, it was small doses of the Nightblood serum. All of my people bleed black. It's why I couldn't get infected either."

I put my rucksack on the ground, pulling out a piece of cloth and wrapping it around Rain's hand, "Can we replicate it? Could we use it to survive?"

Rain shrugged, "I don't know. It's difficult. Many people died from it in the early stages and none of us know what was in it. But you could try." 


	39. Goodbye

The sun set, the sky glowing orange as it did. Beautiful as always. Italmost made all the pain, anger and grief worth it. Almost.

 

I scanned the beach before me, Emori and Murphy spooned together, using rucksacks as pillows, the furthest away to the left. Bellamy and Clarke laid by the fire, Bellamy staring up at the stars with Clarke laid on her side, head on his chest. Raven and Monty laid back to back at the right side of the fire, close to the Rover and Harper fell asleep curled up on the backseat of it. Everyone and everything was peaceful at last. This was all me and Willow ever dreamed of.

 

I was still torn, questioning if leaving was really the best plan. Four Months until everything would be destroyed. At least I have options:

1) I return to the Asylum and my people.

2) I go with Clarke and hers.

3) I stay on this Earth and watch it burn. Hopefully my blood keeps me alive. And if not, at least I went down with the ship - I guess.

 

I sighed.

 

I couldn't stay here. I couldn't go back either. Returning to the Asylum is much too painful. Everyone I loved was murdered there. There is no going back. And staying here? Its just not possible. I don't fit in with these people. I just don't. And besides, I've just been given my freedom, I need to explore this whole new world - so to speak.

 

I was ready to go. Sat in my own van. My bags were packed. All I had to do was turn the ignition. My fingers hesitated over the key. Perhaps I knew she was about to come join me.

 

The passenger door opened and Octavia climbed in, shutting the door behind her. "You really going then?" She said, her tone level, slightly disappointed, sad even. She tried to hide it, of course.

I nodded, watching the waves moving in and out before me, "Yeah. There's a whole world to explore."

Octavia shrugged, "You could still come back with us. We could introduce you to our people, show you round Polis and the Ark. I bet you've never been inside a spaceship before."

"I could," I played along, "Tick off spaceship from the bucket list. Maybe even become a warrior like you. Do the plaits and warpaint and everything."

Octavia nodded, "Yeah. I could make you my second. You seemed to beat Murphy's ass pretty well, just need to teach you to control your emotions."

I smiled, despite the fact I still regretted the day we met. I hated violence, I hated killing. I'm sure deep down, Octavia hates it too. Sometimes we have to sacrifice ourselves in order to survive.

 

"I could be your second." I stated, my own mind briefly toying with the idea, considering it in order to spend time with her. But deep down, I knew it's not what I wanted. "I could, but I'm afraid I'd kick your arse too much."

Octavia looked at me, "I haven't come here to stop you from leaving." She stated, her eyes sad.

I nodded, "You couldn't even if you tried."

Octavia nodded, "I know." She paused, looking out at sea, "I just, I just wanted to tell you that if you ever find yourself in the Eastern parts of America, just know there's a place for you. With-with uh-me." She looked at me, repeating more firmly, "There's a place with _me_."

I nodded, holding out my hand towards her and she took it, intertwining her fingers with mine. "I'll keep that in mind." I told her gently.

She nodded, "Good."

 

The van felt silent. Our hands connected as we both watched the stars come out around us. The moon full and shining bright. Everything quiet except for the sound of Octavia breathily quietly.

 

I sighed, feeling the weight of the world on my shoulders.

Octavia looked at me, "What's wrong? You never did say what happened with Charles."

I closed my eyes, piecing myself together before recalling the events, "I shot him." I stated, feeling my heart sink, seeing his bullet wound burned into my brain, "He told me I killed Clara. He told me I murdered Willow and he-he, um, he said I _killed_ my sister." I opened my eyes, to see Octavia watching me intently, I felt a tear roll down and wiped it away. My voice was croaky as I explained,"There was this girl, Melody. She had skin like mine but chocolate brown eyes and her hair was in a bob. I guess she looked like me. She was strong too. She originally lead our group, she was a bit of a bitch though." I paused, "It was after one of outbursts. We tried to escape twice. They caught us the first time, we were merely sneaking out in the darkness, planning to just runaway as far as possible. We didn't know about the trackers or the force field. They caught us, the soldiers. They caught us and locked us up. The next day they put us on a stage in front of the whole asylum. He made me choose between Willow and Melody. Melody told me to choose her. She told me to. I stood with my pistol against her head, my hand shaking. I squeezed my eyes shut - but I couldn't do it. I couldn't. I swear I didn't squeeze the trigger but a shot fired and she was dead. But I _swear_ , I didn't do it." I looked at Octavia, tears pouring down, "I didn't do it."

Octavia nodded, "I believe you."

 

She pulled me into her chest, holding me as I sobbed and sobbed and sobbed. Crying out all of the grief I had built up inside, feeling Octavia's warmth surround me, the only thing keeping me stable. The same feeling she provided the night I confessed to knowing where Emori was. Octavia had come to be my comfort, she helped with Clara and she helped me with Esme. Now she helps me with my grief and I help her with hers. As she holds me in the van, keeping me from breaking, I further question if leaving is the right thing.

 

I came up for air, my tears finally drying. Octavia wiped the pools of wet under my eyes away with her soft thumbs. Her own cheeks looking wet under the starlight, "It's okay, Rain. We will get through this. I promise. Together."

My forehead creased, "Together?"

She nodded, "Together." She looked round the van, "I'll-I'll come with you. Me and you, let's just go."

I shook my head frantically, she needed to be with Clarke and the others. They were the only ones that could save her from the death wave, "No. You have to stay with your family, Octavia."

Now it was her time to cry, "No, no. I can't let you leave, Rain. I can't watch you _leave_ me. Not again."

I put my hands on her cheeks, "You have to let me go. I'll come back, I _promise_ you. When you least expect it, I'll be back. But for now, I have to go."

Octavia shook her head, "No. No, please, no. Just one more night, please."

I looked at her, staring in her broken green eyes, "I can't."

Octavia looked down at the seats, her hands on the back of my neck, she leant close, resting her forehead on mine, "Please." She whispered.

I looked down at the seat, another tear spilling from my eye. Octavia brought her lips to mine, salty and sad. Sloppy and fragile. I kissed her back, just one kiss.

 

Octavia parted. She wiped her eyes, she looked at me one last time before forcing herself out the van. She stood on the beach with her hand on the passenger door, her hair blowing in the wind, her eyes puffy and red. "Goodbye, Rain."

 

She slammed the door shut.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is technically the end, there is an epilogue, but what a cliff hanger this would be if I left it here...


	40. Epilogue

**_ Octavia _ **

 

This is it. The end of the world. I stand with my spacesuit on in Alie's lab. Bellamy and Clarke with us too, holding hands. Raven and Monty sat in the pilot seats, Murphy and Emori behind them. My heart kept beating inside my chest. I couldn't get in just yet, there was five minutes before we had to leave and I just refused to go without her.

 

I haven't seen her since I told her goodbye. I don't know if she's still alive or not, but she's the only thing that has kept me going through it all. She's the silver lining in all of this.

 

Luna leads her people, crackling to us through a radio from the bunker, leading with Roan by her side. A democracy at last, joined by Kane, Jaha, Indra and Abby too - the new council, welcoming us to a new age. Perhaps peace is in our grasp after all.

 

But truthfully, none of that matters if she is not here right now.

 

"Two minutes, Octavia." Raven softly said from inside the pod.

I nodded, "I know." I said, feeling my heart sink. I put my helmet on, my heart breaking as I lifted my leg to step inside the spaceship.

 

"Wait!" An our of breath voice called, I turned to see her standing there, already wearing her red space suit. Blue eyes glinting as ever, her hair was in a messy plait like the day we met. She smiled, "I've come to take you up on your offer."

I smiled, my helmet on, she pulled me into a hug. Her arms wrapped around me, I had waited so long for this.

"Hurry, lovebirds, we have 30seconds to launch!" Raven told us.

I grabbed Rain's hand, pulling her in. She put in her helmet and we buckled ourselves in. This was it: the end of the fucking world.

**Author's Note:**

> So, I originally wrote this story back in 2016 on Wattpad, I decided to rewrite it on here as I always mention that I like to write about different ships, so I decided to showcase some of my earlier works but by rewriting them to improve some chapters.
> 
> You can go see the original via this link:  
> https://my.w.tt/x22ChuIrKT
> 
> There are some differences:  
> 1) Jasper is dead in the AO3 version, whereas on Wattpad he’s alive  
> 2) The ships are slightly different  
> 3) I have merged chapters as in Wattpad chapters were around 500-800 words, now they are 1000-2000 words, allowing more detail and flow of the story  
> 4) I have rewritten and added chapters, as well as changing the order of some key points within the story to build up tension better  
> 5) The Original Character is slightly different
> 
> That’s about it, I hope you like and I will most likely post everyday since I’ve alrefay edited half of it :-)


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